The 2024 UK General Election - news, speculation and updates

[kebabking]

I've had one email and three SMS texts from Labour since 5pm - two asking for money, and two asking for volunteers. Disappointedly it seems they aren't making my constituency - Wyre Forest - a priority, but want help in Worcester, Wolverhampton, and Coventry.

It's now four emails - two national, one regional and one CLP. Election was only called 5 hours ago.

Heard on the radio - PM one assumes - that Labour have been ready to go since May, and that the Tories aren't ready at all. The surprise election - a surprise to the people who called it.

Fuck me laughing....

 

[ouirdeaux]

Strong and stable...

 

[gosub]

We hope

If I wake up on 5th July to find that Luz Truss is the only tory left think I'll despair...its not the main problem but not having an opposition is part of the current problem

 

[gosub]

It's now four emails - two national, one regional and one CLP. Election was only called 5 hours ago.

Heard on the radio - PM one assumes - that Labour have been ready to go since May, and that the Tories aren't ready at all. The surprise election - a surprise to the people who called it.

Fuck me laughing....

True Llap Goch masters

 

[Puddy_Tat]

Must admit I was surprised the election's been called so early. I was assuming that he'd hang on in the sure and certain knowledge that, given time, Starmer or Labour would do something so despicable that they'd screw their chances.

A friend (not on here) has reminded me that I said round xmas time that he might try and call it so as to (try and) benefit from a euro 24 bounce.

but more recently, i've thought they would wait

and in the meantime can siphon off more money to their mates and bugger a few more things up for the next government to deal with / get blamed for

wonder what they are expecting to hit the fan over the summer?

 

[two sheds]

I can imagine the tories are pissed off with the decision, a lot of them will be losing six months salary.

Touch wood.

 

[Petcha]

I cannot wait for election night watching Suella on that shitty little stage tamely applauding the winning candidate next to a guy in a silly hat. Thank you Rishi, at least for that.

 

[gosub]

I can imagine the tories are pissed off with the decision, a lot of them will be losing six months salary.

Touch wood.

Plus pension calculations

 

[two sheds]

and any final insider trading tips for their port.fo.lio.

 

[T & P]

I can imagine the tories are pissed off with the decision, a lot of them will be losing six months salary.

Touch wood.

I suspect that’s the chief reason. Regardless of the defying message they might try to convey in front of a TV camera, surely none of them can be so naive/ disconnected with reality to fail to realise the reason for calling a July election is because the results would be even more devastating to the Tories a few months later.

 

[Ted Striker]

JUST FUCKING ONCE can someone pretend not to open the door after these lecturn announcement, for the lols?

I don't think there has been a better opportunity than May's tearful exit, but someone had the opportunity to do the funniest thing ever

 

[Kaka Tim]

This is hilarious. Tory mps are massively pissed off and his big announcement descends into a rain soaked farce. I really cant think of how Sunaks big play could have gone worse short of strangling Larry the cat on live TV

Bafflement. That is the mood among many Conservative MPs and campaigners at the news Rishi Sunak has called an election for 4 July.

"Conservative MPs are feeling “baffled” and “furious” about the election, and some are submitting letters of no confidence in Sunak, The New Statesman reports.

“To say Westminster did not see this coming was an understatement,” writes editor Rachel Cunliffe. “Up until this morning, No 10 had sent very strong signals that an election would not be called until the autumn.”

There is “widespread fury” in the party from MPs, candidates, grassroots activists, advisers and parliamentary aides, who will lose their jobs if the people they work for lose their seats.

One texted Cunliffe to tell her the decision was cruel”. Another described it as “heartbreaking”.

There is still no understanding of why Sunak chose to make the announcement, she writes, but MPs have told her “it’s a terrible idea”, “I don’t get it”, “really odd”, “he’s given up” and “we deserve to lose”.

Another called the day’s proceedings “a shitshow”.

“It’s hard to imagine a less united party heading into a six-week election campaign,” she concludes. "

“Indoors, dry, no music,” a confused comms adviser pointed out. “There are so many things you can’t predict, but ‘rain makes you wet’ really isn’t one.”

Why Conservatives are furious with Rishi Sunak

heres to more of the same over the next 6 weeks

 

[Wilf]

It's almost as if Number 10 and tory party officials don't look at their phones 35 times a day and see the weather on the homescreen.

 

[spitfire]

snip...There is “widespread fury” in the party from MPs, candidates, grassroots activists, advisers and parliamentary aides, who will lose their jobs if the people they work for lose their seats.

One texted Cunliffe to tell her the decision was cruel”. Another described it as “heartbreaking”...snip

My heart bleeds purple piss for them. I hope the DWP shows them benevolence and understanding.

 

[spitfire]

Anyhoo...

I'm on ur boardz, wasting ur 2024 election bandwidthz

www.urban75.net

 

[Calamity1971]

 

[Nine Bob Note]

It's almost as if Number 10 and tory party officials don't look at their phones 35 times a day and see the weather on the homescreen.

They did. They were going to have the speech indoors until people (including here) started calling him a wuss for being afraid of a little rain and he was duely sent outside.

 

[Wilf]

They did. They were going to have the speech indoors until people (including here) started calling him a wuss for being afraid of a little rain and he was duely sent outside.

He should have known his party history, as he'll now and forever be classed as a wet.

 

[Elpenor]

Gove must have done a couple of slugs to come out with this

Michael Gove, however, backed the prime minister’s decision by channelling the SAS. “Who dares wins,” he is said to have told colleagues. “And you have dared, PM, and will win.”

Rishi Sunak takes gamble by calling UK general election for 4 July

PM announces date with Tories trailing Labour by 20 points in polls, saying it is ‘the moment for Britain to choose its future’

www.theguardian.com

 

[T & P]

You can see why the reboot of Spitting Image a few years ago was a damp squib. These cunts are so surreal in their shitness and batshit politics there’s nothing left worth satirising. They make the likes of John Major look almost good by comparison ffs…

 

[Wilf]

Is there still time for Nadine Dorries to defect to Labour?

 

[gosub]

You can see why the reboot of Spitting Image a few years ago was a damp squib. These cunts are so surreal in their shitness and batshit politics there’s nothing left worth satirising. They make the likes of John Major look almost good by comparison ffs…

Nah more they wouldn't be able be able to keep upwith puppet production. Takes a while for a characterisation to bed in...
Back then you could storm off from Robin Day for calling you a here today gone tomorrow politican...statement of fact these days

 

[oryx]

So, what are people's theories as to why they called it now?

I've heard:

• the Rwanda scheme is likely to fail spectacularly, so let's call an election before we make tits of ourselves over it
• announcement about inflation coming down, that should make people forget the cost of living crisis, Partygate, Lettuce Truss crashing the economy, not being able to get a doctor's appointment until October, shit in the water, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.
• the footy is on and that will result in a spontaneous outburst of joyous patriotism which will make people forget the Lettuce, Partygate, see above, and vote Conservative.

I haven't heard that a huge scandal is about to break or anything like that, which could add to the fun.

 

[Wilf]

Nah more they wouldn't be able be able to keep upwith puppet production. Takes a while for a characterisation to bed in...
Back then you could storm off from Robin Day for calling you a here today gone tomorrow politican...statement of fact these days

By the by, realising the tories are almost certainly gonners, I wonder if the beeb will be a little less craven to them for the next few weeks (regardless of the impartiality rules they've been ignoring for a while anyway)?

 

[gosub]

So, what are people's theories as to why they called it now?

I've heard:

• the Rwanda scheme is likely to fail spectacularly, so let's call an election before we make tits of ourselves over it
• announcement about inflation coming down, that should make people forget the cost of living crisis, Partygate, Lettuce Truss crashing the economy, not being able to get a doctor's appointment until October, shit in the water, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.
• the footy is on and that will result in a spontaneous outburst of joyous patriotism which will make people forget the Lettuce, Partygate, see above, and vote Conservative.

I haven't heard that a huge scandal is about to break or anything like that, which could add to the fun.

As said. no room for tax breaks in an autumn budget. Will still probably have a rate cut ahead of election. Rwanda was always appearance doing something rather than a thing so wherls were always going to fall off. Football won't do them favours. ...hope German passport control is up to the challenge

 

[Raheem]

So, what are people's theories as to why they called it now?

I've heard:

• the Rwanda scheme is likely to fail spectacularly, so let's call an election before we make tits of ourselves over it
• announcement about inflation coming down, that should make people forget the cost of living crisis, Partygate, Lettuce Truss crashing the economy, not being able to get a doctor's appointment until October, shit in the water, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.
• the footy is on and that will result in a spontaneous outburst of joyous patriotism which will make people forget the Lettuce, Partygate, see above, and vote Conservative.

I haven't heard that a huge scandal is about to break or anything like that, which could add to the fun.

It's the first one. Just from the point of view that making one policy the centre of everything and then timing the election for just before it comes to fruition would make no sense at all. So it must be that it was probably/certainly not going to happen.

Inflation coming down makes no sense because it's been coming down and it will probably carry on doing so.

Football makes no sense because it's a gift to Starmer, who will spend day after day talking about football in interviews.

 

[Wilf]

Football won't do them favours. ...hope German passport control is up to the challenge

Going to be tricky for starmer though, he'll obviously want to fly the flag of St George on every bodily surface. But then he was a ....... Palestinian.

 

[Petcha]

Amusingly the guy blasting out the shitty song on whitehall came armed not just with with his dodgy yet surprisingly little set of speakers. But, also. A huge fucking umbrella.

 

[kenny g]

Amusingly the guy blasting out the shitty song on whitehall came armed not just with with his dodgy yet surprisingly little set of speakers. But, also. A huge fucking umbrella.

It sounded like he used pretty intense sound compression to have maximum impact.

Noticeable you are able to trundle that size of black boxes along Whitehall without being tasered, presumably a euro umbrella and beer fed countenance is enough to convince the peelers one is not carrying things that go bang.

 

[PR1Berske]

It sounded like he used pretty intense sound compression to have maximum impact.

Noticeable you are able to trundle that size of black boxes along Whitehall without being tasered, presumably a euro umbrella and beer fed countenance is enough to convince the peelers one is not carrying things that go bang.

He's managed to circumnavigate the increasingly tight protest laws, and we all know they've been moving the goalposts every time he finds a new way to score against them.