Kirstie Allsopp discussion

[LakieLady]

It was the 1960s but my dad I think cycled from Manchester to Munich with mates after his O levels, then his bike got pinched so I think he got the train home on his own.

Not sure where he would have stayed, maybe camp sites or hostels? He might have sent a postcard home every so often but I doubt it knowing him. He would have been streetwise having grown up on the mean streets of Cheadle Hulme

Luckily terrorism and child abduction by paedophiles hadn’t been invented then so todays risks were not present /s

Early 70s, I was 16 and went to the south of France with my boyfriend, by motorbike (although I was 17 when we got back).

It was very educational. I learned that France is far bigger than I imagined and that long motorbike rides literally give you arseache.

 

[skyscraper101]

I've seen people in their late teens/early twenties who have absolutely no sense of independence and its scary. Kids who are over parented, have had everything arranged/organized for them their entire lives, and then don't know how to cope when they're on their own and freak out.

All I ever wanted when I was a kid was to be an adult and do things on my own terms. I'm just glad my parents were similarly minded so I was left to it.

 

[Dystopiary]

Once you're 16 it's seen differently legally though.

I moved out of my parents' place at 16 but had I done so at 15 I'd've been sent back or taken into care.

 

[skyscraper101]

That's why it was a dick move whoever reported her to child protection. Sure he was under 16 but only by a matter of days. Virtually all his year group were already 16 (he was a summer born child) so the conundrum was to either let him enjoy a bit of independence with his slightly older friend which he'll probably remember for the rest of his life, or stick to some arbitrary age delineator because rules.

Obviously there has to be age based laws but we all know they're arbitrary because there's no other way to do these things. It's like reporting on a 17 years, and 11 months old kid for drinking a beer. Get a fucking life.

 

[danny la rouge]

In Scotland there is no law about what age you can leave your child alone.

The question would be one of how much the parent could reasonably seen as putting the child at risk.

 

[belboid]

In Scotland there is no law about what age you can leave your child alone.

The question would be one of how much the parent could reasonably seen as putting the child at risk.

no such law in England or Wales either. It's all about the risks, shock horror, all children are different.

 

[Sweet FA]

In Scotland there is no law about what age you can leave your child alone.

The question would be one of how much the parent could reasonably seen as putting the child at risk.

Not in England either - it's a trick question on every safeguarding training I've ever done.

 

[Looby]

That's why it was a dick move whoever reported her to child protection. Sure he was under 16 but only by a matter of days. Virtually all his year group were already 16 (he was a summer born child) so the conundrum was to either let him enjoy a bit of independence with his slightly older friend which he'll probably remember for the rest of his life, or stick to some arbitrary age delineator because rules.

Obviously there has to be age based laws but we all know they're arbitrary because there's no other way to do these things. It's like reporting on a 17 years, and 11 months old kid for drinking a beer. Get a fucking life.

Whoever reported it might have been acting maliciously, they might be a busy body or they might have been concerned about a 15 y/o away from home without a responsible adult.

Other kids of his age wouldn’t cope or would be a disaster. I’d say the same about a 16 year old too so it’s not just about the arbitrary age cut off.

As I said earlier, this was likely a well planned, properly monitored and funded trip but we can’t just assume it was because the parents are famous and wealthy.

Unless we know who reported it and why, we don’t know the motivation or whether the family are personally known to them. They might have had worries we don’t know about.

Anyway, she got a phone call and it’s done. Why is this such an issue?

 

[purenarcotic]

Whoever reported it might have been acting maliciously, they might be a busy body or they might have been concerned about a 15 y/o away from home without a responsible adult.

Other kids of his age wouldn’t cope or would be a disaster. I’d say the same about a 16 year old too so it’s not just about the arbitrary age cut off.

As I said earlier, this was likely a well planned, properly monitored and funded trip but we can’t just assume it was because the parents are famous and wealthy.

Unless we know who reported it and why, we don’t know the motivation or whether the family are personally known to them. They might have had worries we don’t know about.

Anyway, she got a phone call and it’s done. Why is this such an issue?

Because the upper middle class don’t think social services apply to people like them. It is a well known issue within social care of struggling with these kinds of families because they will have their solicitor present from the get go, their attitude and expectations are very different… I don’t know what the evidence is (and hard I think to gather it) but there has been concern that abuse in these families is missed because of this. I once had a GP receptionist refuse to book me a room to use at the practice to meet a patient in a posh area because ‘domestic abuse doesn’t happen here’. How our concepts and understanding of class and the interactions around that have a real impact when it comes to child protection.

 

[skyscraper101]

As I said earlier, this was likely a well planned, properly monitored and funded trip but we can’t just assume it was because the parents are famous and wealthy.

I'm not assuming though. She was literally on Radio 4 the other day explaining that it was planned, monitored and funded, and was totally fine. I linked to it above.

 

[Looby]

I'm not assuming though. She was literally on Radio 4 the other day explaining that it was planned, monitored and funded, and was totally fine. I linked to it above.

After the concern was raised I’m guessing because that’s why she was on the radio wasn’t it?

 

[Looby]

Because the upper middle class don’t think social services apply to people like them. It is a well known issue within social care of struggling with these kinds of families because they will have their solicitor present from the get go, their attitude and expectations are very different… I don’t know what the evidence is (and hard I think to gather it) but there has been concern that abuse in these families is missed because of this. I once had a GP receptionist refuse to book me a room to use at the practice to meet a patient in a posh area because ‘domestic abuse doesn’t happen here’. How our concepts and understanding of class and the interactions around that have a real impact when it comes to child protection.

Exactly! I’ve seen it a lot.

 

[skyscraper101]

After the concern was raised I’m guessing because that’s why she was on the radio wasn’t it?

She was on the radio last Wednesday on the 21st because of the 'controversy' and there was no mention that she'd been reported. The story that she'd been reported to the social only broke two days ago. I could be wrong but it looks like someone reported her only after they read the news, and he'd returned safe and well.

 

[trashpony]

I think the whole thing is a lie for publicity. Hotels and hostels don’t take under 18s unless they’re with an over 18.

So I think Oscar and his friend went and visited some of their boarding school mates in their homes around Europe. Which is not quite as exciting a story but more plausible. Or they were with an adult.

 

[danny la rouge]

So I think Oscar and his friend went and visited some of their boarding school mates in their homes around Europe. Which is not quite as exciting a story but more plausible.

Good point. I think that’s highly likely.

 

[JimW]

Me and a mate went off hitchhiking around France and the low countries sleeping rough aged 16 after leaving school, funny looking back.

 

[Jennaonthebeach]

She was on the radio last Wednesday on the 21st because of the 'controversy' and there was no mention that she'd been reported. The story that she'd been reported to the social only broke two days ago. I could be wrong but it looks like someone reported her only after they read the news, and he'd returned safe and well.

I read the claim on Twitter that she was only reported after she made statements in support of trans kids. Which seems mad but I've seen worse happen.

 

[danny la rouge]

I read the claim on Twitter that she was only reported after she made statements in support of trans kids. Which seems mad but I've seen worse happen.

I wouldn’t be surprised. That’s the kind of bizarre stuff that the anti trans lobby would get up to. “Child abusers” and all that hysteria.

 

[Thora]

I think the whole thing is a lie for publicity. Hotels and hostels don’t take under 18s unless they’re with an over 18.

So I think Oscar and his friend went and visited some of their boarding school mates in their homes around Europe. Which is not quite as exciting a story but more plausible. Or they were with an adult.

Totally this, she wanted to sound all controversial and edgy and it has blown up in her face How dare some pleb social worker question her parenting!

 

[Jennaonthebeach]

Because the upper middle class don’t think social services apply to people like them. It is a well known issue within social care of struggling with these kinds of families because they will have their solicitor present from the get go, their attitude and expectations are very different… I don’t know what the evidence is (and hard I think to gather it) but there has been concern that abuse in these families is missed because of this. I once had a GP receptionist refuse to book me a room to use at the practice to meet a patient in a posh area because ‘domestic abuse doesn’t happen here’. How our concepts and understanding of class and the interactions around that have a real impact when it comes to child protection.

When i stood for election a few years ago i had the misfortune of having to chat with former Tory leader of the local council who told me straight out that child abuse only happens in poor households.

 

[purenarcotic]

When i stood for election a few years ago i had the misfortune of having to chat with former Tory leader of the local council who told me straight out that child abuse only happens in poor households.

Urgh it is so depressing and unsurprising.

 

[Jennaonthebeach]

Urgh it is so depressing and unsurprising.

She thought posh people were too well educated to be abusive. Makes you wonder why they go out of their way to exclude poor kids from having a decent education if that's what they believe.

 

[Bahnhof Strasse]

I think the whole thing is a lie for publicity. Hotels and hostels don’t take under 18s unless they’re with an over 18.

They do, but you need to arrange things in advance. In the US it can be a very different matter with hotels refusing to let under 21s in to pre-paid rooms and just chucking them out in to the night in places like New York and Chicago

So I think Oscar and his friend went and visited some of their boarding school mates in their homes around Europe.

^^^
But this is the more likely scenario.

 

[Dystopiary]

There are definitely posh women in refuges. I've met them. One time these burly male coppers came looking for this woman; her husband had sent them. I didn't half feel sorry for her.

 

[tim]

I don't think loads of 15 year olds go travelling abroad alone with their mates, no. I'd be very surprised if any of the kids from my son's state school did.
Even when I was at school, our post-GCSE trip was to Newquay not abroad.
If you left your 15 year old home alone for a week I wouldn't be surprised at school/neighbours reporting you.

Isn't Newquay where all public school kids go to surf after their exams? I wouldn't trust myself or any blood relatives on a surfboard in big waves.

 

[bellaozzydog]

It was the 1960s but my dad I think cycled from Manchester to Munich with mates after his O levels, then his bike got pinched so I think he got the train home on his own.

Not sure where he would have stayed, maybe camp sites or hostels? He might have sent a postcard home every so often but I doubt it knowing him. He would have been streetwise having grown up on the mean streets of Cheadle Hulme

Luckily terrorism and child abduction by paedophiles hadn’t been invented then so todays risks were not present /s

If I had to cycle to Munich I think I’d have had my bike stolen in the first week and done the rest letting the train take the strain

 

[tim]

It was the 1960s but my dad I think cycled from Manchester to Munich with mates after his O levels, then his bike got pinched so I think he got the train home on his own.

Not sure where he would have stayed, maybe camp sites or hostels? He might have sent a postcard home every so often but I doubt it knowing him. He would have been streetwise having grown up on the mean streets of Cheadle Hulme

Luckily terrorism and child abduction by paedophiles hadn’t been invented then so todays risks were not present /s

Safer than flying from Manchester to Munich in the 1960s

 

[bellaozzydog]

I've seen people in their late teens/early twenties who have absolutely no sense of independence and its scary. Kids who are over parented, have had everything arranged/organized for them their entire lives, and then don't know how to cope when they're on their own and freak out.

All I ever wanted when I was a kid was to be an adult and do things on my own terms. I'm just glad my parents were similarly minded so I was left to it.

I live with a 35 year old and a 25 year old and neither of them know how to empty a bin

 

[brogdale]

Safer than flying from Manchester to Munich in the 1960s

Unfunny enough without getting the decade wrong.

 

[tim]

Unfunny enough without getting the decade wrong.

Sorry, Munich to Manchester in the late 1950s