Local Newspaper Headlines!

[cupid_stunt]

 

[chandlerp]

FFS, the public are thick.

 

[seeformiles]

Not all heroes wear capes..

https://www.yorkshireeveningpost.co.uk/news/crime/banned-leeds-driver-caught-with-can-of-stella-and-kebab-behind-the-wheel-4723417

 

[Indeliblelink]

Pole vaulter's Olympic dream shattered by his own penis

What a way to miss out on a medal chance.

metro.co.uk

That's got to be hard to take.

 

[Cerv]

Rioter is much less gobby as he cries in court after police dog bit his arse​

Rioter is much less gobby as he cries in court after police dog bit his arse

Steven Mailen, 54, and his partner pleaded guilty to violent disorder in court today.

metro.co.uk

are you allowed to say 'arse' in the paper?

 

[cupid_stunt]

 

[cupid_stunt]

 

[T & P]

 

[cupid_stunt]

'I named my baby after a tasty type of tinned fish - I just love the ocean'

A pair of ocean-loving parents have settled on the perfect name for their little girl, but not everyone is too keen on the name, which puts some in mind of a classic sandwich filling

www.mirror.co.uk

They named it Tuna, but linked from that article is this one...

 

[cupid_stunt]

Seriously, WTF did she expect?

 

[Cerv]

that camera angle is something.
looks like the road is level with the top of her fence and the garden is sunk 2m down.

 

[two sheds]

I'd be more concerned about the pollution tbh

 

[trabuquera]

Cryptozoology headlines are always the best headlines

 

[T & P]

^ That has reminded me of one of my favourite ever stories (and photograph!!)

Rescued baby hedgehog turns out to be hat bobble

A wildlife rescue was handed the ornamental tuft by a well-intentioned rescuer.

www.bbc.co.uk

 

[Artaxerxes]

Cryptozoology headlines are always the best headlines

Mr Trump?

 

[T & P]

 

[moochedit]

View attachment 437526

If only there was some way of preventing people look through a window? (Gap in the market there)

 

[T & P]

Which paper is this, I wonder? This kind of pointless story is the staple of provincial papers but not something I’d expect in the Evening Standard or even Metro.

Also, kudos to the bored content writer trying to get sacked

 

[cupid_stunt]

 

[cupid_stunt]

 

[hitmouse]

View attachment 437526

Not every day you see an actual print headline that reads like a dodgy popup ad that comes up on a pirate streaming site. Not that I would know anything about pirate streaming sites of course.

 

[zedr]

View attachment 437762

Which paper is this, I wonder? This kind of pointless story is the staple of provincial papers but not something I’d expect in the Evening Standard or even Metro.

Also, kudos to the bored content writer trying to get sacked

If it's local I'd assume its the Ham & High?

 

[Boo Radley75]

View attachment 438111

Fe fi fo fum!

 

[hash tag]

View attachment 437526

Did anyone read that story? " my wife looks pretty wife her clothes on, less so without".

 

[T & P]

Another day, another tale of weirdo tinfoil hat NIMBYs concerned local residents angry and confused about a nearby telecommunications mast

'I knew something was up when my pans started rattling'

The mast was taken down eight months ago but now it is back

www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk

The headline is nothing special, but this did make me laugh...

 

[prunus]

Another day, another tale of weirdo tinfoil hat NIMBYs concerned local residents angry and confused about a nearby telecommunications mast

'I knew something was up when my pans started rattling'

The mast was taken down eight months ago but now it is back

www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk

The headline is nothing special, but this did make me laugh...

View attachment 438131

Boo to the subeditor who wimped out with 'a huge mast' rather than 'an unsightly erection'.

 

[cupid_stunt]

 

[chandlerp]

silencer butt deadly

 

[hitmouse]

I know this one isn't actually local news, but I feel it's local news in spirit:
English ChatGPT users flummoxed by language glitch as bot turns Welsh

 

[cupid_stunt]

I guess 123 is the limit.