PM Boris Johnson - monster thread for a monster twat

[Raheem]

It looks better than he does in real life on the regular

It actually does. Worth half a percent in the polls, if anyone watches it.

 

[splonkydoo]

What he looks like the next day after being on the powder and champagne all night I'd say.

 

[two sheds]

Yes, you don't look at that and think "racist, antisemitic, misogynistic, lying cheat"

 

[hash tag]

Gob is wrong

He is wrong.

 

[redsquirrel]

View attachment 225150

That's really quite shit - looks more like his brother

 

[MrSki]

Does anyone know what time of day this is from?

 

[Pickman's model]

Does anyone know what time of day this is from?

9am

 

[two sheds]

Seems to be going down the trumpian school of oratory but with the extra emphasis on buffoonery. Fucking well seems to work for both of them though .

 

[Pickman's model]

Does anyone know what time of day this is from?

Should eject him from a plane over the Irish sea

 

[agricola]

Should eject him from a plane over the Irish sea

... and risk his bloated, fish-rejected carcass washing up on Talacre beach? No thanks.

 

[Pickman's model]

... and risk his bloated, fish-rejected carcass washing up on Talacre beach? No thanks.

Ok, penguin pellets he'll be then

 

[two sheds]

(((penguins)))

 

[Pickman's model]

(((penguins)))

a panel of penguin dieticians have been consulted and they report that while the thought of penguins eating the prime minister appalls most people, who would prefer to see him dissolved in acid, buried alive or hanged, his blubbery body would be very good for the Antarctic birds.

 

[brogdale]

a panel of penguin dieticians have been consulted and they report that while the thought of penguins eating the prime minister appalls most people, who would prefer to see him dissolved in acid, buried alive or hanged, his blubbery body would be very good for the Antarctic birds.

SPAGE?

 

[Pickman's model]

SPAGE?

puap

 

[Streathamite]

Does anyone know what time of day this is from?

It's not cos he's pissed, it's cos he really is lying his head off. A border in the Irish Sea is certain and unavoidable - and he must know this

 

[Pickman's model]

Seumas Milne should have used something more certain Did Corbyn's henchman Seumas Milne infect Boris Johnson with Covid?

 

[brogdale]

Seumas Milne should have used something more certain Did Corbyn's henchman Seumas Milne infect Boris Johnson with Covid?

Thought those types favoured the Bulgarian umbrella?

 

[Pickman's model]

Thought those types favoured the Bulgarian umbrella?

Yeh or polonium

 

[andysays]

Thought those types favoured the Bulgarian umbrella?

Curse you brogdale, I was going to make that joke

 

[phillm]

.

 

[MrSki]

Maybe when he says camping it just means not living in a building?

 

[brogdale]

What do we think Johnson is doing in that tent when his partner & child are in the cottage?

 

[2hats]

 

[Roadkill]

I've just seen this on Twitter, so I don't see why you lot shouldn't suffer as well.

 

[Schmetterling]

 

[stavros]

From his foreword to the DfT's new walking and cycling policy document:

Of course you can't deliver a fridge-freezer on a cargo bike

The lesson being, don't do election campaigning on a bike, lest you encounter journalists you don't like.

 

[Bahnhof Strasse]

Seems his bellend tent wasn’t pitched on the land of the cottage he rented, was on a farmer’s field and erected without permission and Boris and his entourage put chairs next to the fence to make a style rather than walk up to the gate. Boris bailed and left it to the taxpayer to clean up his mess.

 

[two sheds]

Surely not ... trespass and criminal damage

 

[maomao]

Apparently he's had to cut short his holiday because newspapers printing the location put him at risk of sniper fire. If only.