PM Boris Johnson - monster thread for a monster twat

[existentialist]

You're all just cynics. Who wouldn't be delighted by another Johnson in the world?

Me?

 

[krtek a houby]

Marty1.1. Not quite enough differentiation to warrant a new release.

Party with marty

 

[Lucy Fur]

You're all just cynics. Who wouldn't be delighted by another Johnson in the world?

Nobody needs to be delighted by Boris's 'johnson'

 

[two sheds]

See, just cynics . If we're nice I'm sure Marty1.1 will appear on the Trump threads to praise his farsighted policies and admire his fragrant wife.

 

[maomao]

I hear Thomas, after the hospital and that auld fella who raised that dough

Prick. Now I've got a kid with the same name as that cunt does.

 

[two sheds]

That'll teach you to call him Boris

 

[equationgirl]

Prick. Now I've got a kid with the same name as that cunt does.

I'm sure Bojo will insist his new child had a string of ridiculous middle names, so you should be safe on that front.

 

[Sprocket.]

Elton Johnson.

 

[andysays]

My money's on Simon John Symonds-Johnson

Or maybe John Simon Johnson-Symonds

 

[krtek a houby]

I'm sure Bojo will insist his new child had a string of ridiculous middle names, so you should be safe on that front.

One of them should be NHS, as a mark of respect.

 

[wayward bob]

i keep mishearing the news as boris johnson and beyonce have had a baby

 

[Steel Icarus]

i keep mishearing the news as boris johnson and beyonce have had a baby

Beautiful/liar

 

[Yossarian]

Richard William Penis Johnson

 

[Saul Goodman]

 

[equationgirl]

Thelonius Thomas Norman Humberto Sherbet Johnson.

 

[Looby]

Mr Looby has suggested Douglas Hurd Immunity Johnson. It needs work.

 

[Combustible]

Prick. Now I've got a kid with the same name as that cunt does.

Chances are most parents do

 

[maomao]

Chances are most parents do

Yeah but one of the ones you're allowed to talk about.

 

[Artaxerxes]

Prius Humboldt Johnson Pfifel

 

[Septimus Rufiji]

Dagon Cthulhu 'Yig' de Pfeffel Johnson.

 

[Orang Utan]

Boris Piccaninny Watermelon Letterbox Cake Bumboys Vampires Haircut Wall-Spaffer Spunk-Burster Fuck-Business Fuck-the-Families Get-Off-My-Fucking-Laptop Girly-Swot Big-Girl’s-Blouse Chicken-frit Hulk-Smash Noseringed-Crusties Death-Humbug Technology-Lessons Surrender-Bullshit French-Turds Dog-Whistle Get-Stuffed FactcheckUK@CCHQ 88%-lies Get-Brexit-Done Bung-a-Bob-for-Big-Ben’s-Bongs Cocaine-Event Spiritual-Worth Three-Men-and-a-Dog Whatever-It-Takes Johnson Jr

 

[equationgirl]

Damn, I forgot about the de Pfeffel bit.

 

[Chilli.s]

Thomas Winston Artimus Trebuchet Johnson

 

[tim]

Nice to hear some good news for a change and reporters smiling for once when it was announced instead of the c word.

I don't love Boris but he's got character. Congratulations to him and his fiancè on a bouncing baby boy.

Nice to see a lurker giving the pot a good stir.

 

[existentialist]

Nice to see a lurker giving the pot a good stir.

We seem to be breaking out in them at the moment. Is there some sort of cream that can be applied?

 

[equationgirl]

We seem to be breaking out in them at the moment. Is there some sort of cream that can be applied?

Disinfectant should do it.

 

[gentlegreen]

The resident alt-right edgelord twat at work has changed his skype for business message ...
You would have thought the new one (bottom) might have prompted comment in a public university - albeit it's only staff members who see it - but it appears he can do no wrong at the moment...

 

[tim]

We seem to be breaking out in them at the moment. Is there some sort of cream that can be applied?

This should smooth away the rashes

 

[oryx]

I was going to suggest they'll call him something classical and pretentious, in the way that Rees-Mogg called his sixth child Sixtus.

This being Johnson I can see a problem with that. 'Septimus, Decimus?' 'Not really sure to be honest...'.

 

[teuchter]

We seem to be breaking out in them at the moment. Is there some sort of cream that can be applied?

Yeah, self control. It's not really so hard just not to reply. Well, clearly it is for some.