Do angry vegans turn you against going vegan?

[kebabking]

Just in case anyone thought being angry was obligatory if you're vegan

Redruth vegan woman's 'shock' at frog in her Aldi lettuce

Sorry, has yet no one noticed Shevaughan?

Christ, what fucking illiterate crisp packet named, and then recorded that - or was it done over the phone and the 'reporter' so imbecilic that he'd no idea how to spell Siobhan?

 

[ddraig]

chase this one quoad

 

[existentialist]

Sorry, has yet no one noticed Shevaughan?

Christ, what fucking illiterate crisp packet named, and then recorded that - or was it done over the phone and the 'reporter' so imbecilic that he'd no idea how to spell Siobhan?

Proper vegans never use a word with the "bh" letter combination

 

[kebabking]

Actually, the only thing that gets on my tits about preachy vegans is the tediously sanctimonious 'ethical' and 'cruelty free' label they drape themselves in.

Personally I couldn't care less if they break wind and faint all over each other - and actually I have an interest in vegan arguments about the use of resources in livestock Vs arable food production - but fuck me sideways, being a sanctimonious, holier than thou smug cunt is not the way to win friends and influence people...

(And, dear vegans, I have a sneaky feeling that for lots of the brethren, it's not - it's about feeling all superior to the carnists and plastic vege's - that for a true vegan, animals must die at the hands of others...).

 

[8ball]

I've decided to go along to the vegan stand-up comedy night with a vegan mate of mine.

Will report back...

 

[kebabking]

I've decided to go along to the vegan stand-up comedy night with a vegan mate of mine.

Will report back...

Will the joke be that the Vegans can't stand up for more than a few minutes at a time?

 

[8ball]

Will the joke be that the Vegans can't stand up for more than a few minutes at a time?

I've got a feeling from looking up blurb and some names that these ones will be at the upper end of the self-awareness curve, so one of them might make that joke themselves.
We'll see, though.

 

[Saul Goodman]

Actually, the only thing that gets on my tits about preachy vegans is the tediously sanctimonious 'ethical' and 'cruelty free' label they drape themselves in.

Personally I couldn't care less if they break wind and faint all over each other - and actually I have an interest in vegan arguments about the use of resources in livestock Vs arable food production - but fuck me sideways, being a sanctimonious, holier than thou smug cunt vegan is not the way to win friends and influence people...

(And, dear vegans, I have a sneaky feeling that for lots of the brethren, it's not - it's about feeling all superior to the carnists and plastic vege's - that for a true vegan, animals must die at the hands of others...).

Just kidding... but on my quest to garner more knowledge on the subject, I've been getting to know a few of more of our vegan friends. So far only 88% of them are sanctimonious cunts, so not all of them are in it for self-righteous reasons.

 

[Spymaster]

I've decided to go along to the vegan stand-up comedy night with a vegan mate of mine.

Why did the carnist cross the road?

 

[andysays]

Why did the carnist cross the road?

No, wait, I know this one. Does it have something to so with fragility?

 

[Jeff Robinson]

Torture as usual on Britain's farms. Video shows piglets being smashed against a wall

Red Tractor accepts need for change as shoppers want more spot checks

 

[8ball]

Torture as usual on Britain's farms. Video shows piglets being smashed against a wall

Red Tractor accepts need for change as shoppers want more spot checks

I think this is a wonderful thing.

Would be a hypocrite to say otherwise.

 

[Saul Goodman]

Why did the carnist cross the road?

To carry the vegan across who wasn't strong enough to manage it himself?

 

[Spymaster]

No, wait, I know this one. Does it have something to so with fragility?

Possibly. I’m sure we can think of a few.

Similarly, how many vegans/carnists does it take to change a lightbulb?

 

[Saul Goodman]

Similarly, how many vegans does it take to change a lightbulb?

It depends how heavy the bulb is, but I'll hazard a guess at 12.

 

[Brownglass]

I have a feeling you’re not going to be here very long.

Story of my life!

 

[existentialist]

No, wait, I know this one. Does it have something to so with fragility?

I think chickens are going to be involved.

 

[Brownglass]

I think chickens are going to be involved.

They do taste good, though!

 

[existentialist]

Possibly. I’m sure we can think of a few.

Similarly, how many vegans/carnists does it take to change a lightbulb?

One carnist, one vegan. The carnist changes the bulb, while the vegan reminds everybody that he's a vegan.

 

[existentialist]

They do taste good, though!

Wouldn't know: I'm a fragile carnist vegetarian.

 

[8ball]

One carnist, one vegan. The carnist changes the bulb, while the vegan reminds everybody that he's a vegan.

And a second vegan to steam the first vegan's vagina.

 

[Spymaster]

One carnist, one vegan. The carnist changes the bulb, while the vegan reminds everybody that he's a vegan.

.... and therefore, morally superior to bulb changers.

 

[existentialist]

.... and therefore, morally superior to bulb changers.

...and decide that light is meat, so we should all be living in the dark.

 

[8ball]

To carry the vegan across who wasn't strong enough to manage it himself?

To persecute the vegan who had freed the chicken from the chains of carnist oppression?

While picking up the chicken's remains for dinner, since chickens have little road sense, possibly.

 

[Saul Goodman]

the vegan reminds everybody that he's a vegan.

This is what I've come to notice in my quest to learn a little more about our vegan friends.
It's like that Apple fanboi joke. How do you know someone owns an iPhone/iPad? Wait for 2 seconds and they'll tell you. The same seems to apply to the majority of vegans (in my research). They seem to be wearing veganism as a fashion* statement.

*see: moral superiority.

 

[8ball]

This is what I've come to notice in my quest to learn a little more about our vegan friends.
It's like that Apple fanboi joke. How do you know someone owns an iPhone/iPad? Wait for 2 seconds and they'll tell you. The same seems to apply to the majority of vegans (in my research). They seem to be wearing veganism as a fashion statement.

I've got an iPhone *and* an iPad.

*And* I had a vegan tea last night.
Mostly because I'd accidentally frozen my eggs, but it counts.

 

[existentialist]

This is what I've come to notice in my quest to learn a little more about our vegan friends.
It's like that Apple fanboi joke. How do you know someone owns an iPhone/iPad? Wait for 2 seconds and they'll tell you. The same seems to apply to the majority of vegans (in my research). They seem to be wearing veganism as a fashion statement.

More than fashion - there is usually (but not invariably) a moralistic element

 

[Saul Goodman]

More than fashion - there is usually (but not invariably) a moralistic element

Corrected as you were replying.

 

[8ball]

More than fashion - there is usually (but not invariably) a moralistic element

I think there's a notion of "purity" pervading it.

There is definitely a sub-group of vegans that look down on the sub-group of vegans that enjoy dirty processed vegan snacks.

 

[Saul Goodman]

I've got an iPhone *and* an iPad.

*And* I had a vegan tea last night.
Mostly because I'd accidentally frozen my eggs, but it counts.

See, you're getting there