PM Boris Johnson - monster thread for a monster twat

[Nine Bob Note]

‘Spiritually reluctant’ is great,

Sounds like brewers droop.

 

[Pickman's model]

Stiff upper lip eh?

Lie back and try not to think of england

 

[MrSki]

Edited cos of source.

 

[Artaxerxes]

He's fucked things up so bad there won't be any pantos this year...

...there may not even be any Christmas.

...

Fuck now I like Boris.

 

[Pickman's model]

...

Fuck now I like Boris.

It'll be always winter but never Christmas

 

[Mogden]

The round up of the year programmes are going to be great this year aren't they! It'll just be a montage of Johnson fuck ups.

 

[MrSki]

The round up of the year programmes are going to be great this year aren't they! It'll just be a montage of Johnson fuck ups.

Led by Donkeys did a good one for the beginning of Covid-19. ETA up to early May.

 

[MrSki]

Here it is. Well worth the 9 minutes.

 

[Nine Bob Note]

It'll be always winter but never Christmas

I put the first xmas stock out at work in August FYI

 

[two sheds]

Here it is. Well worth the 9 minutes.

Damning - would also have like to have seen 5th March with him saying we should "take it on the chin"

 

[Mogden]

Here it is. Well worth the 9 minutes.

It's like a bad Hollywood movie when you think the plot is too far fetched isn't it. Well summarised though.

 

[Mogden]

For contrast we could do with a Boris interview, preferably one in his youth, that talks about his ambition to be PM and what he hopes to achieve for the Great British public.

 

[Nine Bob Note]

Damning - would also have like to have seen 5th March with him saying we should "take it on the chin"

Bit late after 29th Feb

 

[tim]

Do I detect a lack of appreciation for our Glorious Leader?

Having nearly been killed by Covid19 he is clearly a wiser but no less incompetent man

 

[MrSki]

Having nearly been killed by Covid19 he is clearly a wiser but no less incompetent man

He was not nearly killed by it. He needed a bit of oxygen. Not on a ventilator or an induced coma.
His policies have led to countless deaths. If he had any sense of duty he would step down.
Herd immunity?
Take it on the chin?
He has got blood on his hands.

 

[Puddy_Tat]

if he really had it and wasn't hiding in a fridge...

 

[MrSki]

if he really had it and wasn't hiding in a fridge...

Or drying out.

 

[Raheem]

Something that was missed in the video is that the first Cobra meeting Johnson did attend, on 2 March was an "emergency" meeting which was supposed to happen on 27 February, but was postponed because Johnson had made plans to celebrate his engagement over the intervening weekend.

 

[two sheds]

Bloody good summary though that the Inquiry will ignore when it gives the government a resounding thumbs up

 

[MrSki]

 

[MrSki]

Daily Star continuing its support for cuntchops.

 

[wtfftw]

Good confidential masterplan

 

[ska invita]

strangely satisfying

 

[quiet guy]

strangely satisfying

Ooh do we all get a go?

 

[MrSki]

 

[Part 2]

Ooh do we all get a go?

It used to be possible here (although it doesn't work for me now)... Boris Johnson: give the blithering buffoon a well deserved slap!

 

[Streathamite]

I must admit, I am baffled by how Johnson continues to be so monumentally shit at PMQs.
OK, I get that a skilled, experienced and very able barrister has a huge natural advantage over a hack journo who has wiunged it all the way to becoming PM, but even so....ever since he stood for Tory leader as overwhelming favourite to win, he knew these sessions were coming his way. He's had over a year's practice at them now, and he has a whole flotilla of advisers and civil servants to prepare him for them. And it really shouldn't be that hard ro anticipate what questions Sir Quiff might ask. It's not as if there aren't obvious contenders.
Today wasn't his worst ever, but he was still truly dreadful.

 

[Pickman's model]

I must admit, I am baffled by how Johnson continues to be so monumentally shit at PMQs.
OK, I get that a skilled, experienced and very able barrister has a huge natural advantage over a hack journo who has wiunged it all the way to becoming PM, but even so....ever since he stood for Tory leader as overwhelming favourite to win, he knew these sessions were coming his way. He's had over a year's practice at them now, and he has a whole flotilla of advisers and civil servants to prepare him for them. And it really shouldn't be that hard ro anticipate what questions Sir Quiff might ask. It's not as if there aren't obvious contenders.
Today wasn't his worst ever, but he was still truly dreadful.

He may have gone to Eton and Oxford and been mayor of London but that doesn't mean he can't be a thick as pigshit ignorant yahoo with all the charm of a dog shit in your bed

 

[Streathamite]

He may have gone to Eton and Oxford and been mayor of London but that doesn't mean he can't be a thick as pigshit ignorant yahoo with all the charm of a dog shit in your bed

All true!
The thing is, I've met him - on several occasions, albeit a long time ago. I instnctively knew that one shoulod never, ever trust him, but It was clear that there was a brain whirring away in there - in fact, that's precisely why he has this upper class twit persona, as camouflage for that. And he has knowledge and 'culture' of the sort that you expensively buy in.
I think the reason why he is so dreadful at PMQs is that he believes such humdrum, mundane things as doing your preparation and mastering ylur briefs is beneath him, it's for lesser beings (he has a huge ego). And also because this is a man who became PM at 54, but who had winged it in every single other job he had, for the previous 33 years, relying on improvisation, bluster, charm and cheap gags (and a certain way with words), and often outright lies, to get wherever and whatever he wanted. It's too late for him to change that now.

 

[MrSki]

all the charm of a dog shit in your bed