Local Newspaper Headlines!

[Yuwipi Woman]

The actual campaign isn't that bad:

That slogan though!

 

[eatmorecheese]

Tree gives middle finger to Croydon | Your Local Guardian

A slow news day today...

 

[cupid_stunt]

Tree gives middle finger to Croydon | Your Local Guardian

A slow news day today...

I am loving the photo & caption.

A rude tree has been spotted giving the middle finger to Croydon.

 

[eatmorecheese]

I am loving the photo & caption.

A rude tree has been spotted giving the middle finger to Croydon.

View attachment 150046

The article could only be the product of someone out of their mind with boredom

 

[neonwilderness]

In tree related news...

Angry grandma uses Vauxhall Zafira to stop 'beautiful' trees being chopped down

"It is a beautiful view, stunning- we don't even close our blinds so we have the full view of the trees.

"Especially now in the autumn - people go to America just to see a view we have on our back doorstep.

 

[two sheds]

That should be national not local news

I read they're cutting down thousands of trees without proper cause.

 

[a_chap]

Use any means possible to stop the bastards cutting trees down. Even a Vauxhall Zafira will do.

 

[two sheds]

well obviously you'd push a bmw in the way if you could find one.

 

[petee]

Man who jumped out of freezer and died was cold-case suspect

 

[catinthehat]

72 Year Old Farmer Visits Reykjavík For The 1st Time - The Reykjavik Grapevine

In which a farmer is forced to visit the city for the first time in his life due to a cow related injury. He finds it unsatisfactory. His wife finds him changed on his return - he is all Hollywood and cocky now after the big city.

 

[Nine Bob Note]

The headline is much as you would expect from a local paper in the arse end of nowhere, but what a photo!

 

[Voley]

'Face Of Jesus' appears in split tea-bag.

Woman claims split tea bag makes the face of Jesus

'I believe it's a sign.'

 

[DotCommunist]

72 Year Old Farmer Visits Reykjavík For The 1st Time - The Reykjavik Grapevine

In which a farmer is forced to visit the city for the first time in his life due to a cow related injury. He finds it unsatisfactory. His wife finds him changed on his return - he is all Hollywood and cocky now after the big city.

This is the quote of lol:

“It’s of course somewhat of a tragedy having to break the principle of never going to Reykjavík, but the decision wasn’t taken lightly,” Guðmundur told RÚV. “A cow hit its tail into my eye and caused heavy bleeding, it got better, but a couple of days ago I got dark circles under my eyes and my vision went blurry. So I had two options–neither good–to lose my sight or go to Reykjavík.”



Farmers, the same worldwide

 

[Ground Elder]

New 'Face Of Jesus' appears in split tea-bag.

I'm not convinced that is Jesus

 

[kabbes]

I'm not convinced that is Jesus
View attachment 150379

Jesus is in the eye of the bag-holder.

 

[pseudonarcissus]

The headline is much as you would expect from a local paper in the arse end of nowhere, but what a photo!

Barrow Eveing Mail....arse end of nowhere.....how very dare you!

 

[hash tag]

Robbers told to come back later; so they did
Are these the most incompetent robbers?

 

[dessiato]

Not a newspaper, but a headline (and funny story) nonetheless

Belgian robbers asked to come back - and arrested on their return - Are these the most incompetent robbers?

 

[petee]

Not a newspaper, but a headline (and funny story) nonetheless

Belgian robbers asked to come back - and arrested on their return - Are these the most incompetent robbers?

don't look up ...

 

[cupid_stunt]

Robbers told to come back later; so they did
Are these the most incompetent robbers?

They didn't just come back once, but twice at 17.30 & again at 18.30.

 

[hash tag]

 

[neonwilderness]

Watch bus driver's odd decision to stop on roundabout in rush hour

This is the moment a bus driver made the bizarre decision to stop while travelling around a Gatesheadroundabout - causing a rush-hour traffic jam.

Exiting from High Street West, Jason Bourne captured the dash cam footage while driving at about 4.30pm on Tuesday.

Watch the video to see the "rush-hour traffic jam". It's a pretty shit addition to the Bourne film series

 

[cupid_stunt]

Watch bus driver's odd decision to stop on roundabout in rush hour

Watch the video to see the "rush-hour traffic jam". It's a pretty shit addition to the Bourne film series

That's not a traffic jam, this is a traffic jam...

Comedian David Baddiel says Worthing traffic 'is like no other I've ever seen'

Thousands of drivers have been affected by the gas main repairs along Worthing seafront - and it turns out a comedy legend was among them.
Three Lions hitmaker David Baddiel was driving from Brighton towards Worthing yesterday when he hit the traffic caused by emergency gas repairs along Brighton Road.

He said: "Pulled over from a traffic jam between Brighton and Worthing which is like no other I’ve ever seen. We may be unwittingly part of an art installation entitled Driving Is A Really ******* Stupid Idea."

His tweet said: "Lancing Beach, looking worth the hour and a half it took to get here from Brighton yesterday afternoon."

OK, an hour and a half to travel 12 miles is bad, but has he never been in a jam on the M25?

Besides, it was caused by emergency gas repairs, FFS, the whinging twat.

 

[cupid_stunt]

Another non-story from the Worthing Herald...

Adur and Worthing police clamp down on rogue traders and cold-callers

Prevention teams for Adur and Worthing went out with two trading standards officers and spoke with 12 to 15 tradespeople.

Police said the team did not identify any rogue workers and everybody spoken to was happy with the work being completed.

 

[hash tag]

Watch bus driver's odd decision to stop on roundabout in rush hour



Watch the video to see the "rush-hour traffic jam". It's a pretty shit addition to the Bourne film series

I like that, the bus driver was obviously a great team player and was helping out their fellow bus drivers
Traffic jams - you aint seen nuffin until you been to London in the rush hour on a Friday night - starts around 15:00 and goes on until about 20:00, though by comparison,
its a rush hour most of the day here

 

[neonwilderness]

I like that, the bus driver was obviously a great team player and was helping out their fellow bus drivers
Traffic jams - you aint seen nuffin until you been to London in the rush hour on a Friday night - starts around 15:00 and goes on until about 20:00, though by comparison,
its a rush hour most of the day here

I know that bit of town and it clearly wasn't filmed anywhere near rush hour. The 10 seconds or so obviously made a massive difference to the guy's day

 

[hash tag]

Dont forget a bus conveys many people. Outside home, we have a choice of two buses to get us to the centre of town. At worst they are every 12 minutes.
If they run ahead of schedule, they will often take an enforced pause at a stop, complete with an announcement to the effect that they are regulating
the service, correcting the flow or some such like.

 

[editor]

Black bra found on the ground in Chesterfield

On Friday afternoon, reader Adam Ward discovered a black bra on the way into Tesco Extra on Lockorford Lane. Cestrefeldians are growing used to such an occurance. In the summer, a black pair of underwear and a pink sock were found on a Chesterfield footpath. READ MORE: Underwear and sock found dumped on Chesterfield footpath And last year, a pink bra was discovered draped over a tree branch - with the Crooked Spire in the background - on the town's cycle path

Black bra found on the ground in Chesterfield

 

[neonwilderness]

Gordan Ramsay 'gutted' his son is at Exeter University - and is now wearing his pants

"All mine were in the bloody wash so I thought Jack has nicked my bloody pants again. Low and behold upstairs in his drawer.

"So I put them on and just sat on the bed thinking, “damn bud I miss you”. Seriously."

 

[petee]

Anyone Want to Adopt a 28-Pound Cat? Doughnut Needs a Home

he's big-boned