I wrote this some years ago
Come on, let’s save the planet!
I don’t think you poor people are really trying.
You could do more.
Haven’t you invested in solar panels?
You should keep chickens.
Surely you have time to make your own cheese, yoghurt, and bread.
Especially if you don’t have a job.
You could even get your children to help you.
It would do you good to have activities the whole family could participate in.
Try not to overfill your kettle.
Organic food is much tastier, so it’s worth those few extra pennies!
Plan where you could put your compost bin.
And a pen for a lovely goat.
Surely you could do without your week’s holiday somewhere warm.
Especially if you don’t have a job.
Both our cars runs on ecologically sound fuel.
You don’t have to stop spending, as long as you buy lots of eco-friendly things.
We can all save the planet together.
Just promise us
if all the good things we’re doing
and all the lovely green products we’re buying maniacally
somehow don’t work
and the climate changes apocalyptically
and we’re all trying to survive
you won’t eat us.
