The Ashes 2019

[Monkeygrinder's Organ]

So go on someone. Give us a quick summary.

England were in a strong position but have completely fucked it. Now they'll be looking to bat all day to get a draw - chances are they won't be able to but it's not impossible.

Also it might be a draw if they lose too much playing time to rain. This is the traditional draw saver for English teams.

 

[TopCat]

England were in a strong position but have completely fucked it. Now they'll be looking to bat all day to get a draw - chances are they won't be able to but it's not impossible.

Also it might be a draw if they lose too much playing time to rain. This is the traditional draw saver for English teams.

Succinct. Nice. How much rain equals draw?
How many runs to win?

 

[kabbes]

Succinct. Nice. How much rain equals draw??

probably a good number of the key hours between 11 and 6.

How many runs to win?

Too many. That’s basically impossible.

 

[TopCat]

Commentator saying some will come out and go for it.

 

[butchersapron]

Commentator saying some will come out and go for it.

It would be the craziest thing ever to happen in test cricket. We have one opener who isn't great defensively and is used to attacking as first option. That will be it on that front. Beyond no chance.

 

[TopCat]

Sun is beating down.

 

[kabbes]

England would have to bat all day and also somehow get more than 4 an over to win. Or bat for half a day for about 9 an over. It would be utterly stupid to even try it.

 

[Casual Observer]

Which commentator said England might go for it? Not even Michael Vaughan after 15 pints would say that.

Current BBC forecast says no rain for Edgbaston today.

 

[kabbes]

Boycott is a twat but he says good things about cricket:

“What I'm concerned with, if I was an England supporter, is the comments coming out this morning from England sources about playing your normal game. I'm going woah, hang on a minute. This is not normal. You're trying to save a Test match on a worn pitch.”

 

[Lord Camomile]

"If", Geoffrey?? "IF"??!

 

[butchersapron]

Our normal game is not going to save us is it? A hyper aware on every ball attitude might.

 

[Lord Camomile]

I genuinely don't believe you can jinx things or tempt fate, but fuck's sake it can be harder some days than others...

 

[planetgeli]

Never said it does compare with what you have described. Shall we turn it in? Cos really no point in us bickering about this, is there.

I’m not bickering. I answered your question. Then referred back to where the original conversation started which was me claiming you can’t play and miss 34 times without being lucky, and that one day soon your luck will run out.

Oh look. Burns out, caught for bugger all.

 

[planetgeli]

Forecaster says estimated end time of game 3.30.

 

[Argonia]

I could umpire this game better than the existing umpires

 

[Casual Observer]

3 times Root has been given out in the match so far and successfully overturned it.

 

[butchersapron]

Who Elite Panels the Elite panel?

 

[butchersapron]

3 times Root has been given out in the match so far and successfully overturned it.

And had his stumps hit.

 

[planetgeli]

3 times Root has been given out in the match so far and successfully overturned it.

Moeen Ali got given out three times in six balls once and overturned them all.

The umpiring ain’t great.

 

[SpookyFrank]

I could umpire this game better than the existing umpires

Wilson's a relative newbie, but Aleem Dar has been umpiring since god was a boy and usually to a far better standard than this. Dunno what the fuck's going on.

 

[Casual Observer]

The third umpire in this one, the appropriately Chris Gaffney, also gave Chris Gayle out twice in 6 balls in the world cup. Both overturned.

Actually one of the three Root overturned dismissals in this game was the one that hit the stumps and didn't dislodge the bail. An understandable skybound finger in that instance.

Atherton: "Talking of annoying buzzing sounds, here's Nasser"

 

[SpookyFrank]

Forecaster says estimated end time of game 3.30.

Can this lot block for two sessions though? I'm not sure they can. Root and Stokes probably the only two with that kind of mindset.

 

[butchersapron]

Can this lot block for two sessions though? I'm not sure they can. Root and Stokes probably the only two with that kind of mindset.

Buttler stokes and woakes all have the mental stuff to do that. To bat against their inclinations.

edit: mo and bairstow - who knows anymore....

 

[planetgeli]

This is getting ridiculous.

 

[Mogden]

Fucking ridiculous umpiring. At this level you need to know your stuff

 

[Casual Observer]

Up to 4/4 for Root on reviews.

Back to Burns for a minute. The '34 play and misses in a day' statistics is down to the way Cricviz overzealously categorise how the batsman plays every ball in their craving to statify anything that moves. They weren't play and misses in the traditional sense - wild slashing outside off stump. Burns was deliberately playing the line between where the ball pitched and his stumps to negate being out bowled/lbw. That the ball went passed both bat and stumps is neither here nor there. Shrewd batting from the Surrey ace.

 

[butchersapron]

Up to 4/4 for Root on reviews.

Back to Burns for a minute. The '34 play and misses in a day' statistics is down to the way Cricviz overzealously categorise how the batsman plays every ball in their craving to statify anything that moves. They weren't play and misses in the traditional sense - wild slashing outside off stump. Burns was deliberately playing the line between where the ball pitched and his stumps to negate being out bowled/lbw. That the ball went passed both bat and stumps is neither here nor there. Shrewd batting from the Surrey ace.

Yes, played and missed is often a great defensive option. Huge diff between picking line and play away and wafting at the ball. It's a naming error.

 

[planetgeli]

Up to 4/4 for Root on reviews.

Back to Burns for a minute. The '34 play and misses in a day' statistics is down to the way Cricviz overzealously categorise how the batsman plays every ball in their craving to statify anything that moves. They weren't play and misses in the traditional sense - wild slashing outside off stump. Burns was deliberately playing the line between where the ball pitched and his stumps to negate being out bowled/lbw. That the ball went passed both bat and stumps is neither here nor there. Shrewd batting from the Surrey ace.

Yeah, he’s shown that shrewdness ever since too. 19 runs for 2 dismissals (caught) since then.

Meanwhile Jason, just grind them down...oh.

 

[Steel Icarus]

Apparently he paused before entering the dressing room. Not surprised.

 

[Casual Observer]

Yeah, he’s shown that shrewdness ever since too. 19 runs for 2 dismissals (caught) since then.

Meanwhile Jason, just grind them down...oh.

You first slagged off Roy's hundred and quoted the '34 played and missed' statistic in the same post that you admitted that you hadn't seen a ball of that day's play. What's with the prejudice? You've become the Katie Hopkins of the cricket form.

Cricviz are the same people as Winviz by the way. They gave England a 75% chance of winning the game yesterday morning.