Local Newspaper Headlines!

[flypanam]

Irishman, 33, admits injecting himself with his own SEMEN to treat severe back pain | The Irish Post

 

[dessiato]

It's an old one but few people believe me when I tell them.



It was 28 years ago today.
The night the circus turned into a 'horror movie'

Mrs Miggins

 

[Dom Traynor]

It's an old one but few people believe me when I tell them.

View attachment 159424

It was 28 years ago today.
The night the circus turned into a 'horror movie'

Mrs Miggins

I was living there then and had totally forgotten about it!!

 

[dessiato]

I was living there then and had totally forgotten about it!!

There's a few of us from there on here.

 

[neonwilderness]

'Beheaded swan' was actually plastic ornament

 

[Raheem]

Irishman, 33, admits injecting himself with his own SEMEN to treat severe back pain | The Irish Post

When offered treatment by his GP, he 'opted to discharge himself', according to the article.

 

[Dom Traynor]

There's a few of us from there on here.

I lived there from 90 to 96

 

[Badgers]

 

[petee]

Man says emotional support alligator helps his depression

 

[Bus Honeygun]

Old one.
We've all felt a bit peckish after reading about mercy killings...

 

[Poi E]

At least the corpse didn't go to waste.

 

[neonwilderness]

Woman refused Take A Break mag over £1 row

 

[sim667]

The picture for this one is incredible.

Residents irate over shop alarm going off for four nights

"
Bath residents irate over shop alarm blaring out for four nights"

 

[Calamity1971]

The picture for this one is incredible.

Residents irate over shop alarm going off for four nights

"
Bath residents irate over shop alarm blaring out for four nights"

No wonder he can't sleep, state of that fucking pillow.

 

[dessiato]

No wonder he can't sleep, state of that fucking pillow.

Nice slippers though.

 

[chandlerp]

Maybe if he didn't sleep out in the street he wouldn't hear the alarm.

 

[Badgers]

 

[Yossarian]

 

[petee]

Bill Would Make Sasquatch Washington’s Official State Cryptid

"Senate Bill 5615 revives a measure first introduced in 2017 by Sen. Ann Rivers (R-Vancouver etc.). That bill, SB 5816, was “reintroduced and retained in present status” a few times, but never made it out of committee. That doesn’t mean it lacked support, necessarily; it was supposed to be taken up at a public hearing on February 2, 2018, but only after diligently scanning more than 40 minutes’ worth of transcript did I learn that the matter was tabled because the primary witness couldn’t make it:

I have sad news[, the committee chair said]. The sighting of a Sasquatch is not true. The young student who is proposing that—Senator Rivers said that person couldn’t make it up here today, so we’re going to try to do that at a later date. So there is no Sasquatch today.

Nor was there any Sasquatch for the rest of that session, so far as I can tell. But Sen. Rivers is trying again this year"

 

[neonwilderness]

Customer of more than 30 years vows: 'I will never shop at Waitrose again'

 

[two sheds]

Customer of more than 30 years vows: 'I will never shop at Waitrose again'

Needs more detail I think:

A WAITROSE customer of more than 30 years says he will never shop there again after staff mistakenly believed he was taking advantage of the company’s free coffee offer.

 

[neonwilderness]

Needs more detail I think:

I went over to the customer service desk and complained. They were apologetic, to be fair but I emailed the chief executive to ask for an explanation.

 

[two sheds]

The 69-year-old, who lives near the store, then went to get his drink from a coffee machine but it was not working so he tried two other machines, but they were not working either.

Then he said a staff member approached him and accused him of trying to take a free coffee.

• Read more: 'My eggs were full of black spots'- Mum's fears over lack of supermarket response >>>

Mr Hope said he was furious. He added: "She said to me 'it's Waitrose policy to question customers we believe are abusing the system'.

"At that point the coffee machine behind me started working again.

And what were the black spots?

 

[cupid_stunt]

Customer of more than 30 years vows: 'I will never shop at Waitrose again'

It's attracted 115 comments, so far!

LOL Makes a mockery of the Brighton's claim to being a 'City', when its main newspaper publishes such a trivial story as 'news'...

Jesus Wept Argus. Get a proper news editor. This isn't news and you've wasted a graduate's time and money writing this nonsense.

I read this thinking there must be something outrageous about Waitrose, but no, just some fool throwing a tantrum over a drink. How this ever made it into the paper beggars belief.

I want to see this turned into a movie.

"In a world torn apart by war and strife, a man vows he will never shop at Waitrose again"

I can't be the only one who has noticed a marked decline in the reporting (and editing) standards in the Argus (which were never that high anyway) since the move from Hollingbury to Central Brighton. Perhaps the proximity of several pubs within walking distance of the new Argus offices have something to do with it.

 

[dessiato]

'Would you like a w*nk?' - PubSpy gets surprise proposition on latest visit

 

[cupid_stunt]

Does this one win the thread?

PubSpy offered ‘a wank’ on visit to Mad Hatter Inn

'Would you like a w*nk?' - PubSpy gets surprise proposition on latest visit

Grrr.

 

[two sheds]

Surely the place couldn’t get any crazier, could it?

And on reflection I think Waitrose Man was trying to defraud them out of a cup of coffee.

At that point the coffee machine behind me started working again.

Yes of course it was broken when you tried it before.

 

[chandlerp]

How can you steal something that’s free?

 

[Raheem]

How can you steal something that’s free?

Because everything's free if you steal it.

 

[petee]

it's political correctness gone mad

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