Local Newspaper Headlines!

[Santino]

'Hi, this is Chris Tranter speaking.'

'Bell end?'

'Yes, how did you know?'

'Know what?'

 

[Orang Utan]

yeah, bell bottoms/end is what it meant to me. No idea what purple mitre means, I guess penis?

The glans (Latin for acorn)

 

[little_legs]

 

[Yuwipi Woman]

Oops! They did it again...

LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) — A California couple arrested in Nebraska last month for carrying 60 pounds of marijuana they described as family Christmas gifts have again been arrested in Nebraska, this time on suspicion of carrying drug money.

Patrick Jiron, 80, and his 70-year-old wife, Barbara, both of Clear Lake Oaks, California, were arrested Tuesday along Interstate 80 in southeastern Nebraska, the Lincoln Journal Star reported. They were arrested last month along the same roadway — in the same vehicle — just two counties west....

Authorities have said that when the Jirons were arrested in York County on Dec. 19, they said they didn’t know it was illegal to transport marijuana through Nebraska and that they were planning to give the drug as Christmas presents to relatives in Vermont and Massachusetts.

Here's the real kicker:

The Jirons are the parents of a Vermont prosecutor in Chittenden County, Justin Jiron....

California couple with marijuana gifts arrested again in Nebraska

In their defense, Social Security doesn't go very far these days.

 

[Badgers]

 

[dessiato]

View attachment 125028

Some good meals for the fire crews coming up.

 

[existentialist]

View attachment 125028

I suspect the lorry crashed/caught fire as a result of being driven in reverse along a major road, if that photo is anything to go by...

 

[cupid_stunt]

View attachment 125028

That photo doesn't appear to match the actual scene in anyway whatsoever.



A30 closed because of 17 tonnes of gammon roasted in lorry fire

 

[Mumbles274]

That photo doesn't appear to match the actual scene in anyway whatsoever.

View attachment 125041

A30 closed because of 17 tonnes of gammon roasted in lorry fire

Jack Frost nipping at your nose

 

[a_chap]

 

[wiskey]

Liverpool fan's birthday spoilt by "offensive" sticker on Asda cake box

 

[a_chap]

Dad horrified to find swear word printed on daughter's KFC gravy tub

Worth it even if only for all the very supportive comments

 

[cybershot]

This one from the day before is even better

Liverpool fan's birthday spoilt by "offensive" sticker on Asda cake box

Sticker was probably put there by a relative!

 

[kabbes]

This one from the day before is even better

Liverpool fan's birthday spoilt by "offensive" sticker on Asda cake box

Sticker was probably put there by a relative!

Two posts above your one...

 

[cybershot]

Two posts above your one...

Do'h

 

[petee]

Car Flies About 60 Feet Into Upper Floor of a Building in California

 

[Yuwipi Woman]

Car Flies About 60 Feet Into Upper Floor of a Building in California

It takes talent to get that much air.

 

[wiskey]

Wow!

 

[kabbes]

Car Flies About 60 Feet Into Upper Floor of a Building in California

...the woman, who declined to provide her name, said. “It’s a big hole.”

 

[OzT]

^^^^^^ In the Metro said they were 'high' on drugs when they got airboure after hitting a barrier . . . .

ok, I added the 'high' bit

 

[dessiato]

^^^^^^ In the Metro said they were 'high' on drugs when they got airboure after hitting a barrier . . . .

ok, I added the 'high' bit

Apparently one of the two people in the car admitted to being on drugs. Lucky they didn't kill someone.

 

[cupid_stunt]

What's a Skyscrapper?

 

[Yuwipi Woman]

Seriously! Our drug mules really need to get their shit together:

Two arrested after big bag of pot falls from trailer
Troopers say a driver called about a package falling from a trailer on I-80 in Nebraska.

Nebraska State Troopers say a driver called them after seeing a package fall from a flatbed trailer along Interstate 80 Friday afternoon.

A trooper stopped a Dodge Ram truck that was towing the trailer near the town of Odessa, which is near Kearney.

Another trooper recovered the fallen package and determined that it was filled with marijuana.

Two arrested after big bag of pot falls from trailer

 

[Puddy_Tat]

BMW driver's shock as flying CABBAGE smashes into his car

(Lincolnshire Echo)

Sadly, not a mutant flying vegetable sort of thing. One fell off a lorry...

 

[DaveCinzano]

Early contender for thread POTY:

Woman asks for waffle maker, is reportedly told to f*** off

 

[Opera Buffa]

RSPCA volunteers to dress as bunnies and sleep in hutches to pay for new rabbit accommodation

Volunteers to dress as bunnies and sleep in hutches

 

[DaveCinzano]

Early contender for thread POTY:

Woman asks for waffle maker, is reportedly told to f*** off

bread lover
2 days ago

Never mind asking for a waffle maker, you should try going in there and asking for a toaster !!

 

[cupid_stunt]

I put this on the bandwidth thread, but thinking about it, it should be on this thread...

My God, they are throwing the stuff at each other!

 

[dessiato]

DP

 

[dessiato]

JUICY ARRESTS: Police detain five for 4,000 kilo orange theft