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London SlutWalk - now *11th*June, 1pm Trafalgar Square

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On this point? Several people are claiming that refusing to withdraw is not rape, and they're giving wildly different reasons.

From memory, spanky, louloubelle, TruxTa, revol, past caring, lbj.

I justvwant to know when no really means no, cos I xan't see this grey area being anything but abused. And dangerously confusing for some people too.

I never said such things at all, prick.

and ofcourse a grey area is open to abuse, that's the fucking trouble with all grey areas, it doesn't mean that you can just wish them away.
 
On this point? Several people are claiming that refusing to withdraw is not rape, and they're giving wildly different reasons.

From memory, spanky, louloubelle, TruxTa, revol, past caring, lbj.

I justvwant to know when no really means no, cos I xan't see this grey area being anything but abused. And dangerously confusing for some people too.

You better have a quote where I use those words or very very similar. Honestly, you're not reading very well at the moment. Take a break, is my advice.

But sure, you answer it then - how long between request to withdraw and compliance before it's rape? Seeing as you're keen to pin these things down, what do you reckon?
 
ymu

I don't really understand what is going on in your mind but you seem to be alternating between victim and perpetrator with mercurial rapidity.

Something like ; I'm a rapist / you're all against me / (insert various potty mouthed insults here)

it is disturbing to witness and I'm just wondering if you are acting out some past trauma by participating in this thread in the way that you are. I appreciate that this might sounds like cod psychology to you but I'm really struggling to make sense of your posts and your interaction with others.

Seriously girl, I think you are better than this. Step away for a while and have a rest and a think about what is going on for you.
 
ymu

You just seem to want a definitive rule that will be applicable in any one of a number of diverse scenarios.

The fact is that, much as though it would be lovely to have 100% certainty about all possibly permutations of sexual experience; people are individuals, context is everything and there is no one rule that applies rigidly to all scenarios.

Sometimes you just have to struggle with thinking about something rather than proclaiming that you know The Truth with absolute certainty.

You have expressed the opinion that refusing to withdraw is not rape. I don't know why the other stuff is relevant. It's a complex crime to prosecute, yes. Has nothing to do with the question of whether you should withdraw when asked to or not.

So, when is it permissible to carry on fucking someone when you know they want you to stop?

Because I am gobsmacked at anyone claiming this isn't rape, I thought it was standard. But you were one of those that did. So explain.
 
I'm really struggling to make sense of your posts and your interaction with others.

Seriously girl, I think you are better than this. Step away for a while and have a rest and a think about what is going on for you.


Hear hear, well said, Louloubelle.

Edit: Having said that, I predict another 10 pages by midnight :rolleyes:
 
My point is that I don't know it all and neither do you or anyone else.

Some situations are very clear to all, some are more complex
You were rather categorical when you accused me of trivialising rape. Now, you aren't so sure.

Cheers for that.
 
You have expressed the opinion that refusing to withdraw is not rape. I don't know why the other stuff is relevant. It's a complex crime to prosecute, yes. Has nothing to do with the question of whether you should withdraw when asked to or not.

So, when is it permissible to carry on fucking someone when you know they want you to stop?

Because I am gobsmacked at anyone claiming this isn't rape, I thought it was standard. But you were one of those that did. So explain.


Not playing

You are relating to people in a very distorted way and to continue with this feels like bear baiting or something

Seriously girl, take a break, get a hug / cuddle, have think about what feelings are being triggered in you and why

I have a feeling (could be wrong) that you need a big hug and a long cry about some other thing.

This isn't helping
 
happy-friday.gif
 
I'm not having fucking control freaks telling me how I or anyone else conducts themselves sexually.

this is your whole problem on this thread. you dishonestly characterise perfectly reasonable statements or views from those with whom you disagree

the closest i or anyone else on this thread have come to your statement, is to say that we might not choose to go out with, or have relationships with excessively promiscuous partners.

something that would be perfectly acceptable for a female to say about men, but not vice versa, apparently.

so nothing about controlling you, or women's bodies, or any of that shit, just saying that to some people, myself included, promiscuous behaviour is a big turn off. i'm not telling you how to behave, it's up to you how you live your life. i'm just turning my back on you, is all. that's my fucking prerogative
 
Right, what's going on?

A bunch of people tell me what I did wasn't rape, but they're not saying that refusal to withdraw isn't rape.

Wut?

Rape is an act. The intent and aftermath are irrelevant. I don't get why you're talking about the prosecution side. I'm interested in how a kid like me could have been better prepared for that situation and not become an accidental rapist. That is all.
 
Yes, violence is certainly the right response to hearing something you don't like.

but it is a common response to endless vile insults. if you call someone a cunt and get smacked in the mouth, you can hardly claim it was out of the blue or even unprovoked
 
ymu:

At this point you live by the sword or you die by the sword. Nail it down or keep quiet.

How long does it take you to get your cock out?

I'm interested in what the other person experiences. not what their lawyer says.
 
Just how the fuck have you come up with that conclusion?

You seem to have turned this whole thread into a 'you against everyone else' job, despite only 2 or 3 other posters making vile & totally unacceptable comments towards you.

I've still not read the whole thread, but what I have so far, it seems you have jumped on almost everyone posting, totally misreading what the majority have posted, it's almost like you are responding to a totally different thread on a different site, most odd. :(

I can only go by what people post. Pages of people saying it's not rape and no dissenters ...
 
Right, what's going on?

A bunch of people tell me what I did wasn't rape, but they're not saying that refusal to withdraw isn't rape.

Wut?

Rape is an act. The intent and aftermath are irrelevant. I don't get why you're talking about the prosecution side. I'm interested in how a kid like me could have been better prepared for that situation and not become an accidental rapist. That is all.
Rape is an act. Yes.
It is committed by a person. Yes?
The person is prosecuted, because of the act.

So.

1. Is it the act that's under discussion i.e. what act constitutes rape? Or
2. Is it the person that's under discussion i.e. when is a person's sexual activity subject to criminal sanction?

You may say 2 because of 1 - that's logic.
But it's not the act that's prosecuted. It's the perpetrator of the act.

My guess is that you're trying to establish what constitutes 1 and you're less interested in 2?
 
ymu listen to Loulou, she's genuinely kind and wise x
I know she can be. But I don't do heroes and villains, and on this thread she's criticised me for coarse language whilst ignoring some really shitty stuff. Which doesn't fill me with confidence here.

And she's told me refusal to withdraw isn't rape, but now she doesn't know.

Kinda annoying. I didn't move any goalposts, as far as I can tell.
 
teahead, we have a 6% conviction rate for rape in this country. Discussing it in terms of enforceable lawn is a bit of a non-starter. I would like fewer accidental rapists out there, that's all. I find the discussion about uncertainties and legal problems here offensive. It's offering excuses before it's even been agreed what the boundaries are. Can we not start with some unambiguous boundaries? Like "get out of me" means "get out of me NOW"?
 
jesus fuck this thread took a turn for the fucking messed up.

Consensual sex is consensual sex. If you agree that a sexual encounter is on the cards, and have sex, then it isn't rape. If you decide at the vinager strokes, that you don't want to have sex, then it's it's a bit late, and you're nothing but a prick teaser. If you don't want to get spunk in you, use protection. And yes, someone should pull out of asked. (but it still makes you prick teaser) What the fuck is thread about?
 
You are shifting goal-posts ymu - you wanted a clear, b/w separation between yes and no. I challenged you to do just that using an example you'd previously referred to, but you wouldn't, instead shifting onto what the putative victim thinks/feels.
 
ymu

As I said before (maybe you didn't see it?) this thread has brought out the ugly side of lots of people. In some people just a little bit, in some people a lot.

Please, please take a break. Have think about what's going on for you and if you want to then post again later once you are more clear headed.

Can people please stop provoking her?

I sense that many people on here have been raped or violated in some way, others have been hurt and traumatised in other ways and the thread is triggering people's hurts and traumas and has largely just become people twisting knives in each others wounds.

I don't think it will get much better unless ymu and everyone else steps away for a while.

Pretty please?
 
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