They may well be, but how someone describes themselves is not always exactly what someone else might perceive in them. We don't get to tell other people what to notice or pick up on. What's important is that we pay attention to each other and try to behave with empathy.
Today I didn't, and that was a conscious choice on my part because I was annoyed at seeing a large, bolshy man flouting rules that are for the benefit of eg people with invisible disabilities, who can't wear a mask.
Men are always being exhorted to deal with each others shitty behaviour instead of letting it go on unchallenged. I can hardly apologise for doing that. Still, I'm regretting it more and more with each post.