PM Boris Johnson - monster thread for a monster twat

[Argonia]

They're such lovers of freedom that they've just pushed this through.

Pushed it through like a morbidly constipated man finally pushing through a turd after a laxative in a Japanese squat hole toilet

How does Japanese squat hole toilet in the ground work?

Answer (1 of 11): The toilets are actually known as Turkish toilets. I lived in Paris for a few years as a student. There are thousands of Turkish style toilets in apartments. I actually shared an old second floor, 2 bedroom apartment that had a small foyer, basic kitchen, with a sink and a trick...

www.quora.com

 

[scalyboy]

Pushed it through like a morbidly constipated man finally pushing through a turd after a laxative in a Japanese squat hole toilet

How does Japanese squat hole toilet in the ground work?

Answer (1 of 11): The toilets are actually known as Turkish toilets. I lived in Paris for a few years as a student. There are thousands of Turkish style toilets in apartments. I actually shared an old second floor, 2 bedroom apartment that had a small foyer, basic kitchen, with a sink and a trick...

www.quora.com

Now there's an image

 

[Argonia]

Now there's an image

I found China and Japan a bit trying when there was a public trough in the ground and you had to squat in front of all comers. The best were the Japanese techno toilets - much better than the squatters.

 

[brogdale]

They're such lovers of freedom that they've just pushed this through.

They certainly love the freedom not to be offended by our protest at their venal governance.

 

[Argonia]

They certainly love the freedom not to be offended by our protest at their venal governance.

The kind of freedom that reminds me of George W Bush's freedom fries

BBC NEWS | World | Americas | US Congress opts for "freedom fries"

news.bbc.co.uk

 

[krtek a houby]

I found China and Japan a bit trying when there was a public trough in the ground and you had to squat in front of all comers. The best were the Japanese techno toilets - much better than the squatters.

Dunno about China, but we don't have public troughs in Japan. There are squat toilets though, but tend to avoid them on account of the acrobatic endeavour involved.

 

[Argonia]

Dunno about China, but we don't have public troughs in Japan. There are squat toilets though, but tend to avoid them on account of the acrobatic endeavour involved.

Maybe you're right, there were squatters in individual but secluded toilets in the land of the rising sun. On my trip to Beijing and the Great Wall I was forced to squat in front of a crowd of Chinese guys and I was basically constipated and in agony the whole time,.

 

[Argonia]

I see the evil Tories are phasing out their meagre £20 top up in hopeless pound sterling to the 3 million (or more) unemployed. That's jolly decent and civilised of them as they live in palaces with wardrobes full of luxury suits.

Covid: Universal credit £20 top up to be phased out

The £20-a-week boost - brought in to help with Covid - will be adjusted from this autumn, a minister says.

www.bbc.co.uk

 

[glitch hiker]

I see the evil Tories are phasing out their meagre £20 top up in hopeless pound sterling to the 3 million (or more) unemployed. That's jolly decent and civilised of them as they live in palaces with wardrobes full of luxury suits.

Covid: Universal credit £20 top up to be phased out

The £20-a-week boost - brought in to help with Covid - will be adjusted from this autumn, a minister says.

www.bbc.co.uk

It's only fair....to the legacy claimants who haven't received this top up.

Now everyone can be fucked over by the cunts equally

 

[Petcha]

God he's a cunt

Angela Crawley (SNP) asks if the PM supports her private member’s bill to give paid leave to any woman who suffers a miscarriage before 24 weeks.

Johnson says he feels very sorry for any woman who goes through this. He says the government offers bereavement leave to women who lose a baby after 24 weeks.

 

[Argonia]

God he's a cunt

I nearly made the grave error of turning on BBC2's Politics Live and looking at that 18th century cesspit of a House of Commons but fortunately saved myself and watched a black and white war film on Film Four as I ate my salad for lunch instead. Every time I see that chamber I want to cry and riot simultaneously. I tweeted Hannah Bardell MP and told her I disagree with Scottish independence completely but that the SNP are one of the sanest parties around. I was amused when she got a football out in the House. She still had to say an oath to Queenie like all the rest of them though.unlike Charles Bradlaugh.

Letter from Charles Bradlaugh to the Speaker

www.parliament.uk

 

[brogdale]

Quite good for an MP; expect she nicked it, though?

 

[Pickman's model]

I nearly made the grave error of turning on BBC2's Politics Live and looking at that 18th century cesspit of a House of Commons but fortunately saved myself and watched a black and white war film on Film Four as I ate my salad for lunch instead. Every time I see that chamber I want to cry and riot simultaneously. I tweeted Hannah Bardell MP and told her I disagree with Scottish independence completely but that the SNP are one of the sanest parties around. I was amused when she got a football out in the House.

The houses of parliament nineteenth century, the previous ones burned down in the 1830s

 

[Argonia]

The houses of parliament nineteenth century, the previous ones burned down in the 1830s

Ah yes

 

[Gasmantell]

 

[Pickman's model]

View attachment 277385

Ice-t should come up with a better album cover than that

 

[elbows]

Quite good for an MP; expect she nicked it, though?

View attachment 277383

Johnson variant as a phrase has been around for a while. What happened today is that Labour actually decided to use it, Starmer mentioned it during PMQs, the Labour party twitter account used it, there is a hashtag for it that they want to get trending etc.

I dont think they've picked up on the idea of using Javid-19 yet.

 

[brogdale]

Johnson variant as a phrasehas been around for a while. What happened today is that Labour actually decided to use it, Starmer mentioned it during PMQs, the Labour party twitter account used it, there is a hashtag for it that they want to get trending etc.

I dont think they've picked up on the idea of using Javid-19 yet.

I meant the donor quip tbh.

 

[Pickman's model]

I meant the donor quip tbh.

There's about enough of him to make a big doner thing out of and then serve him to all the Tory bigwigs

 

[Argonia]

Why can't a python bite Alexander Boris on the rear end when he squats over his khazi like this poor chap in Austria?

Man sits on toilet, gets bitten by python

Walter Erhart, 65, got a shock when his neighbour's snake escaped and got into his sewage pipe.

www.bbc.co.uk

 

[glitch hiker]

I don't think I have ever hated someone as much as I hate Boris and his cunt cabal.

It's reached beyond standard issue contempt for the Tories to an active visceral hatred.

 

[Argonia]

I don't think I have ever hated someone as much as I hate Boris and his cunt cabal.

It's reached beyond standard issue contempt for the Tories to an active visceral hatred.

You're not alone. Everywhere you look there is la haine.

 

[Calamity1971]

I hate Boris

Johnson

 

[Argonia]

1 Tory down, 364 to go. The only thing this one got right is that Parliament is "a very strange place"

Rob Roberts: Stay away from Parliament, disgraced MP told

Tories tell Rob Roberts not to come back as his suspension for sexual harassment ends.

www.bbc.co.uk

 

[Artaxerxes]

 

[quiet guy]

What a shocker - Johnson cleared over the Mustique holiday
"Standards committee says Johnson's lack of candour over Mustique holiday 'regrettable', but clears him of breaching code"
"It is unsatisfactory that neither [David Ross, the Tory donor who facilitated Johnson’s stay on a villa in Mustique] nor Mr Johnson explained the arrangements to the commissioner until last autumn and that Mr Ross only provided minimal information on the arrangement this spring and in response to our own enquiries. Mr Johnson has stated himself that it is “regrettable that information has been provided to the commissioner in stages”.

This matter could have been concluded many months ago if more strenuous efforts had been made to dispel the uncertainty. Given that Mr Johnson was twice reprimanded by our predecessor committee in the last parliament in the space of four months for “an over-casual attitude towards obeying the rules of the House”, we would have expected him to have gone the extra mile to ensure there was no uncertainty about the arrangements."

 

[Argonia]

What a shocker - Johnson cleared over the Mustique holiday
"Standards committee says Johnson's lack of candour over Mustique holiday 'regrettable', but clears him of breaching code"
"It is unsatisfactory that neither [David Ross, the Tory donor who facilitated Johnson’s stay on a villa in Mustique] nor Mr Johnson explained the arrangements to the commissioner until last autumn and that Mr Ross only provided minimal information on the arrangement this spring and in response to our own enquiries. Mr Johnson has stated himself that it is “regrettable that information has been provided to the commissioner in stages”.

This matter could have been concluded many months ago if more strenuous efforts had been made to dispel the uncertainty. Given that Mr Johnson was twice reprimanded by our predecessor committee in the last parliament in the space of four months for “an over-casual attitude towards obeying the rules of the House”, we would have expected him to have gone the extra mile to ensure there was no uncertainty about the arrangements."

Just like all those cops getting cleared of the 1788 deaths in police custody since 1990

Deaths in police custody

To date there have been 1901 deaths in police custody or otherwise following contact with the police in England & Wales since 1990 Below is a breakdown of deaths in police custody or following other forms of contact with the police, as well as vehicular pursuits and road traffic incidents (RTIs)...

www.inquest.org.uk

 

[equationgirl]

Yes, the Mustique holiday was always a bit dubious. Boris clearly knows the rules, he just doesn't see why they apply to him.

 

[Argonia]

Yes, the Mustique holiday was always a bit dubious. Boris clearly knows the rules, he just doesn't see why they apply to him.

I want Alexander Boris's carbon footprint to be calculated

 

[equationgirl]

I want Alexander Boris's carbon footprint to be calculated

Steady on, could require a Kray supercomputer.