Crap Hooligans

[tommers]

What are your worst hooligan stories?

So far we have...

The day Chelsea won the league in 2005 I agreed to meet some mates after the match in a pub in Northern in South Manchester . I bowled in a with a Chelsea shirt on and a bottle of cava a bit pissed after having about six pints and instead of seeing my mates walked into a room of United supporters and nearly got stabbed. I wasn't aware that it was Buckethead's ( O'Neils) local away team rendezvous. Thankfully my mates turned up and having their own local reputation saved the NHS from further costs.

I went to millwall vs west Ham in the late 80s with my dad and his brother and his mate - who was a millwall fan. We went in with the millwall fans cos he bought the tickets.

They scored first and we were the only three to stay sat down. We then equalised and were the only three to jump up, cheering.

There were the usual threats, somebody actually said 'you're not gonna make the station' - so we left about 5 mins early.

Me and my mates went to see Newcastle play Inter last time we were in the Champions League, because we got the tickets from the club's official shop in Milan city centre they assumed that I was a Milanese and sold me tickets right next to where the ultras sit. That isn't just unpleasant in Italy it's dangerous sitting in their ultra's territory and supporting the other team

Luckily the police and San Siro staff were totally sound and just let us go to the Newcastle bit even though we had the wrong tickets, but still, 4 Newcastle fans against the Inter ultras, what a terrible day that would have been!

Let's hear em.

 

[biggus dickus]

I also went to Roker Park a couple of times back in the early 90s which was still pretty dangerous for Newcastle fans and even the accent could get you in trouble in those days. Luckily I was only about 12 and I was with my friend and his uncle so absolutely nothing happened

 

[FridgeMagnet]

I was in a pub when 50-100 Milwall fans ran in being chased by coppers. They hung around for about half an hour, drinking maybe half a pint each on average and talking on their phones, and then all left at once. Pretty edgy stuff I think you'll agree.

 

[Spanky Longhorn]

I used to know a hairdresser who was a hooligan.

 

[Belushi]

I was on a tube recently with a mob of West Ham fans. The were actually very friendly and in high spirits, but they could have turned at any moment.

 

[The39thStep]

When I was fifteen in Darlington I threw a coke bottle at some York fans which missed them and broke someone's front window got arrested , gave a false name and then gave my parents telephone number to the Police. Some confusion from my parents which later turned into a lot of angry words and not being allowed out to bathe in the noteriety

 

[butchersapron]

When I was fifteen in Darlington I threw a coke bottle at some York fans which missed them and broke someone's front window got arrested , gave a false name and then gave my parents telephone number to the Police. Some confusion from my parents which later turned into a lot of angry words and not being allowed out to bathe in the noteriety

Was it you who told me the story of getting trapped under a mini after one away match?

 

[silverfish]

I also went to Roker Park a couple of times back in the early 90s which was still pretty dangerous for Newcastle fans and even the accent could get you in trouble in those days. Luckily I was only about 12 and I was with my friend and his uncle so absolutely nothing happened

I worked in a pub near wearmouth bridge that got Newcastle supporters in on a Newcastle/Sunderland matchday at Roker. The boss used to unchain the fire escapes so if the Sunderland fighty types got wind and turned up the Newcastle supporters could all pile out the back as the Makkams assaulted the front

Fighting over footy teams...What a waste of energy

 

[biggus dickus]

Luckily I was only about 12 and I was with my friend and his uncle so absolutely nothing happened

now there is a sentence you'll never hear in counselling

 

[biggus dickus]

I worked in a pub near wearmouth bridge that got Newcastle supporters in on a Newcastle/Sunderland matchday at Roker. The boss used to unchain the fire escapes so if the Sunderland fighty types got wind and turned up the Newcastle supporters could all pile out the back as the Makkams assaulted the front

Fighting over footy teams...What a waste of energy

I thought that it was really funny when Newcastle and Sunderland turned into rich teams and the fans used to arrange fights in the wastelands in Gateshead because they liked fighting each other but were bored of football

 

[The39thStep]

Was it you who told me the story of getting trapped under a mini after one away match?

No but I got my head trapped in the tube doors when I was about 8

 

[T & P]

We were away at Newport and were drinking in a bar near the station when suddenly 50- 80 Newport lads went in and started eyeing us out. I thought it was going to kick off for sure but eventually one or two of them came over and started chatting to us, and everyone chilled. It felt like the school dance with the boys and the girls looking at each other across the floor

 

[JimW]

None that I recall, think other sides top boys took the day off for Crewe. The odd exciting incident with the police, but nothing special.

 

[tommers]

None that I recall, think other sides top boys took the day off for Crewe. The odd exciting incident with the police, but nothing special.

Brilliant. That's exactly what we're looking for.

 

[JimW]

Brilliant. That's exactly what we're looking for.

I recall visiting the old Millwall ground (Cold Blow Lane was it called?) with absolutely zero incident Bit of a bad view up by the floodlight pylon was the major downer of the day.
ETA: Though come to think of it, that was to watch Swindon with a mate who supported them, not Crewe.

 

[Fedayn]

No but I got my head trapped in the tube doors when I was about 8

And just after that head injury you started supporting Chelsea?

 

[Fedayn]

None that I recall, think other sides top boys took the day off for Crewe. The odd exciting incident with the police, but nothing special.

Seen a fairly nasty battle in the car-park of the Crewe Arms Hotel on the day of a Crewe v Wrexham game.

 

[editor]

This is the Spinal Tap of crap hooliganism.

 

[London_Calling]

Two fatties living the Green Street dream:

 

[tommers]

 

[editor]

Two fatties living the Green Street dream:

Is that a facepalm from Gabbidon?

 

[The Boy]

Is that a facepalm from Gabbidon?

Wouldn't you? Shirtless fatty actually looks like he's prancing. Shameful.

 

[biggus dickus]

Is that Mike Ashley streaking?

 

[London_Calling]

That photo just keeps giving

I like that tubby #2 is surrendering.

 

[twistedAM]

That photo just keeps giving

I like that tubby #2 is surrendering.

He's enjoying the man hug.

 

[tommers]

He looks like he's about to burst into song.

This isn't really what I had in mind.

 

[biggus dickus]

I love how everyone just looks disappointed

 

[oryx]

Two fatties living the Green Street dream:

no need for the crowd to askwho'd eaten all the pies.

 

[Deareg]

One afternoon after United played Liverpool at Anfield we were all queuing up to get onto the bus's that would take us back to Lime Street Station, all of a sudden there was a big roar in the distance and United fans started running away along the pavement, some of ours started shouting stand your ground, so we stopped and let off a big roar of our own and went charging back the way we had just come, we got so far back up the pavement when again we heard a roar in the distance and next thing we were running back along the pavement in the direction that we had initially run, once again some of ours started shouting stand your ground, we all stopped, let a roar out and went charging back up the pavement, this was repeated about 3 or 4 times in each direction without me seeing a single Liverpool fan.

We eventually got on the bus's and all went home.

For some reason the song, The Grand Old Duke of York, springs to mind.

 

[deadringer]

Last time West Ham played at Spurs I was wandering down the platform on my own at Liverpool St to go to WHL, with a newspaper and a latte, in my Spurs top. On the packed train were loads of vocal Hammers being escorted by the police, bashing on the windows, calling me a cunt and other nasty things. Kept my head down, walked to the front of the train where mercifully it was a bit empty. Got on board, read an article in my paper about the Eurozone, and enjoyed my latte in peace.