The Dominic Cummings file

[Boris Sprinkler]

So am I. Who is he? Why is he on television?

As far I am aware he is the prime minister of the untied kingdom's big brains special advisor. He is not elected, He tells Boris what to do or something.
He went to mummy and daddys house because it's big, and in the country and the zombies were coming in London. Rather than just staying put in his undoubtedly large house in London. Cos he's a cunt.

But rumour has it...he was selling the NHS - i think he also mentioned it in his speech.

He won't resign because he has a plan. They won't fire him because he has a plan and he delivered Brexit. So he is their Svengali. I dont know, reading the tiwtter about it and people are pretty fucking angry. At best he's fucked the point of lockdown cos people will make their own executive decisions from now on. But srsly what kind of muppet does that?

 

[Wilf]

So, when for the resignation? I'm going to stick a flag in Wednesday.

He's a 100% liar, but the way this was spun doesn't give the media too much leverage. I suspect he's going to stay. His relationship with the media will be awful though.

 

[Steel Icarus]

This has just been highlighted to me. There is a outline. Can't unsee it now.

?

 

[8ball]

Professor did not nip out for a shag, she came to his flat. So lockdown was still broken that way.

But if he hadn't invited her in, it would only be her breaking the lockdown.
Cunning plan missed.

 

[maomao]

?

She's talking about his twinkle.

 

[The39thStep]

Full account in the Spectator

Dominic Cummings: Why I travelled to Durham

This is a transcript of Dominic Cummings’ statement: Around midnight on Thursday, the twenty sixth of March, I spoke to the prime minister. He told me that he tested positive for Covid. We discussed the national emergency arrangements for No.10, given his isolation and what I would do in No. 10...

www.spectator.co.uk

 

[harpo]

Alistair Campbell pulling no punches.

 

[phillm]

Testing his eyesight. So if he crashed the car and injured or killed somebody then he could conclude that he shouldn't have driven. You couldn't make it up.

 

[t0bytoo]

Alistair Campbell pulling no punches.

Crazy times. He's loving it. In a slightly sadistic way..

 

[Calamity1971]

Who's this little prick on sky?

 

[Lord Camomile]

I thought before that he had said that they had checked available avenues.

My memory was he didn't want to ask local friends to put them at risk of the deadly virus, but his nieces are 17 and 20 so in the 'safest' category.

 

[little_legs]

 

[agricola]

Who's this little prick on sky?

Darren Grimes

 

[8ball]

My memory was he didn't want to ask local friends to put them at risk of the deadly virus, but his nieces are 17 and 20 so in the 'safest' category.

That sounds about right, think there was also something about not being able to get a babysitter but tbh I've been half-working through the thing.

 

[equationgirl]

My memory was he didn't want to ask local friends to put them at risk of the deadly virus, but his nieces are 17 and 20 so in the 'safest' category.

Except there is no safe category with coronavirus, really. So he was still being a cunt.

 

[phillm]

Who's this little prick on sky?

exactly that

 

[8ball]

Darren Grimes

That is such a Sky News name.

 

[Nine Bob Note]

Who's this little prick on sky?

I just turned over and thought Tom Daley had taken up alt-right politics

 

[Roadkill]

?

 

[The39thStep]

Who's this little prick on sky?

Darren something cant stand the little jumped up weirdo

 

[Wilf]

Anyway, my middle aged bladder wants to know he was taking.

 

[ruffneck23]

There is only one thing people are going to remember.

He didn't apologise.

Cunt (upgraded from wanker deservedly)

 

[Mogden]

 

[Treacle Toes]

He's made the Trumpian fake news argument without using the expression #Scummedia is trending on twitter in defence of him.

 

[elbows]

He's made the Trumpian fake news argument without using the expression #Scummedia is trending on twitter in defence of him.

Are any actual real people involved or just bots?

 

[philosophical]

What happened to the journalist Pippa? Had she lost interest in the story?

 

[elbows]

There is only one thing people are going to remember.

He didn't apologise.

Cunt (upgraded from wanker deservedly)

They might remember the eyesight excuse too.

 

[The39thStep]

"Barnard Castle welcomes drivers who can see properly"

 

[8ball]

There is only one thing people are going to remember.

He didn't apologise.

Well, if we had a populace which could remember more than one thing we wouldn’t be in this mess.

 

[Roadkill]

He's made the Trumpian fake news argument without using the expression #Scummedia is trending on twitter in defence of him.

Has been all day. It's the latest bit of alt-right whataboutery.