PM Boris Johnson - monster thread for a monster twat

[Calamity1971]

Hahaha

We’re like a herd of elephants smelling danger,” a senior backbencher tells me. “There’s been a distinct stirring, we’re anxious and distressed. There’s some trumpeting. But the real shift is we’re slowly on the move – away from Boris.”

 

[MrSki]

 

[Badgers]

Boris Johnson is not suing a news outlet that ran claims he made a “callous jibe” about his own wife, Downing Street said today.

A source told The New European Mr Johnson had claimed he had “buyer’s remorse” after marrying Carrie, who is pregnant with the couple’s second child, last year.

No10 deny Boris Johnson is suing paper that claimed he made jibe about his wife

Downing Street said the claim the PM said he had 'buyer's remorse' after his marriage to Carrie was 'completely untrue' - but said he is not taking legal action

www-mirror-co-uk.cdn.ampproject.org

 

[equationgirl]

Oooh I bet Carrie has had a few choice words on the matter.

 

[Pickman's model]

Oooh I bet Carrie has had a few choice words on the matter.

I wouldn't be surprised if she's seeking a book contract

 

[Pickman's model]

Oooh I bet Carrie has had a few choice words on the matter.

Wouldn't it be appropriate if she left him holding the babies? See how he likes being a single parent for a change. Bet he'd be on the phone to gingerbread about every little thing

 

[Chilli.s]

I wouldn't be surprised if she's seeking a book contract

I guess that's the way he'll try and weasel his way out of it with her, make it chapter fodder. Most will see it as her public humiliation. Ha ha ha

 

[equationgirl]

Serve him right if she did walk out.

 

[not a trot]

Serve him right if she did walk out.

Bet he keeps the dog and abandons the sprog.

 

[Badgers]

Bet he keeps the dog and abandons the sprog.

Again

 

[equationgirl]

Again

Yes but this time I hope she takes the dog with her, and sells her story to OK! and Hello! magazines, after screwing him for all the hidden millions he has.

 

[Calamity1971]

 

[Monkeygrinder's Organ]

Exclusive: Boris Johnson in fresh inquiry after Jennifer Arcuri agrees to assist ethics watchdog

The American businesswoman, and the prime minister’s ex-lover, is to let officials at London City Hall see extracts from her diaries

www.theguardian.com

Suspect this is mostly the Guardian getting breathless as usual but it's fun to speculate right?

 

[quiet guy]

 

[eatmorecheese]

I'm still a bit amazed that this self-centred blancmange with hair is still as popular as he is. At least with the electorate. The parliamentary Tory Party are starting to turn, citing 'character issues' that were blindingly obvious to any vaguely sentient person years ago.

Despite the futility of it, I'm looking forward to the usual Tory regicide that comes eventually

 

[Dogsauce]

I’ve given up on being optimistic about the decline and death of the Tory party. Too many false hopes. Remember the absolute shitshow of May’s premiership, discord everywhere? Yet here we are again. Cockroaches won’t die.

 

[Badgers]

 

[two sheds]

Has Carrie heard what he said and punched him?

Shame the nameplate it wasn't Uganda.

 

[LeytonCatLady]

 

[Storm Fox]

Boris is screwed, The Express has the Headline today "Boris IS Still a Winner" Based on 'The Rule of The Express Weather Headlines' assume the opposite and you can't go far wrong.

 

[Badgers]

National embarrassment

 

[quiet guy]

Don't limit his range, he's a fully fledged International embarressment.

 

[teuchter]

I’ve given up on being optimistic about the decline and death of the Tory party. Too many false hopes. Remember the absolute shitshow of May’s premiership, discord everywhere? Yet here we are again. Cockroaches won’t die.

Urban75's most consistent characteristic is being wrong about the imminent implosion of the conservative party.

 

[Badgers]

 

[Orang Utan]

View attachment 297609

“Where’s my coke? I thought that was part of the deal”

 

[elbows]

Boris is screwed, The Express has the Headline today "Boris IS Still a Winner" Based on 'The Rule of The Express Weather Headlines' assume the opposite and you can't go far wrong.

THe smallprint reveals that he is still a winner of the most hated tory shithead competition.

 

[equationgirl]

His mad idea of having a bridge between Ireland and Scotland has been scrapped, because of high forecasted costs.

Northern Ireland to Scotland bridge plans scrapped

Building a fixed link would be too expensive, a feasibility study is expected to conclude.

www.bbc.co.uk

Fuck me, I did not see that coming

 

[Pickman's model]

His mad idea of having a bridge between Ireland and Scotland has been scrapped, because of high forecasted costs.

Northern Ireland to Scotland bridge plans scrapped

Building a fixed link would be too expensive, a feasibility study is expected to conclude.

www.bbc.co.uk

Fuck me, I did not see that coming

Fortunately there is no danger of the grytviken - buenos aires friendship bridge being cancelled, so Johnson will get to work on it

 

[Puddy_Tat]

His mad idea of having a bridge between Ireland and Scotland has been scrapped, because of high forecasted costs.

Northern Ireland to Scotland bridge plans scrapped

Building a fixed link would be too expensive, a feasibility study is expected to conclude.

www.bbc.co.uk

Fuck me, I did not see that coming

there's a surprise

and at peter hendy for managing to do a feasibility study rather than just laughing at the whole thing...

 

[quiet guy]

Still you've got to wonder what they've spent so far on feasibility, market focus groups etc. etc.
I'm sure someone has made a tidy packet out it.