My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding

[5t3IIa]

because it is a closed community though, i doubt they would allow those kinds of documentaries to be made - i reckon if you said 'what happens if someone was gay' they would most likely say 'there are no gay travellers'. would love to be proved wrong on that, just a gut instinct. that's my main worry, is that there is soo much responsibility on these young people, especially the young women and girls to be a 'good traveller girl' and as i say its similar to keeping strictly christian children home schooled (i think this is wrong) or forced (not arranged) marriaged in the muslim community (i think this is wrong) - that doesn't mean i think people shouldn't be christians or muslims.

It might be a closed community but it's not hiding in a box with one locked door

 

[Proper Tidy]

also, the glaring contradictions. if the girls are pure til marriage through their own choice, why do they have to be chaperoned? i think there is an awful lot of cognitive dissonance going on.

Interesting point. In last night's episode, one of the women said that if a rumour goes around it will be believed and will ruin the woman's life - maybe as big a factor as anything actually happening.

 

[5t3IIa]

It must have happened though

 

[radio_atomica]

Interesting point. In last night's episode, one of the women said that if a rumour goes around it will be believed and will ruin the woman's life - maybe as big a factor as anything actually happening.

That's true, if a 3rd party is there they can be backed up if anyone starts rumours. But it must be a headfuck - its their choice to wait until marriage, but they're not even allowed to carry out that choice without other people interfering, the risk of rumours, the possibility that their reputation will be ruined and then that'll be it forever because nobody will marry them.

Also the pure til marriage, only go out in groups doesn't apply to boys as well, but they're not supposed to mix with outsiders so who are they getting their jollies with?

 

[5t3IIa]

I imagine the boys can fuck whoever they want.

 

[Proper Tidy]

I imagine the boys can fuck whoever they want.

Yeah, seems that way

 

[radio_atomica]

Yeah - so who?

 

[Proper Tidy]

I used to drink in a pub which a lot of travellers used to drink in - all nice fellas - but anyway they didn't seem to have many reservations about flirting with non-travelling women. No idea if anything ever happened or if it was just flirting though. Also they used to buy us a fuckload of drinks. I liked them!

 

[Ivana Nap]

some questions though - what happens if a young person in that community is gay? what happens to a girl who is raped or sexually abused - is she classed as 'dirty' and therefore unmarriable same as a girl who has consentual sexual activity before marriage? what happens to a girl who gets 'too old' to get married? what about kids who want to keep going to school?

It's a five part series so hopefully some of that will get covered, they can't just show five hours of gaudy dresses.

 

[5t3IIa]

Yeah - so who?

Well, anyone, in a manner of speaking. I am not sure closed community means what you think it means. The young people go to school, college and the pub among a million other places. They live in West London.

 

[skyscraper101]

That Liverpudlian dress maker woman must be loving all the promo she's getting too.

 

[Serotonin]

I've worked with a couple of traveller women who claimed that domestic violence and sexual abuse were endemic in the traveller cOmmunity. Both had been disowned by their families for speaking out about their experiences.

 

[Chairman Meow]

The money behind the bar is for drinks, but also compensation to the bar owner should things kick off. There are a few bars and hotels that will accomodate them, but they all want extra money. I know in Youghal last time there was a gypsy wedding they shut most of the town for the afternoon, as the other shops and bar owners didn't want to take any chances.

 

[Phenol]

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Gypsy-Boy-Struggle-Escape-Secret/dp/0340977965


Read this and it will answer just about all the questions asked on this page - great book actually!

 

[radio_atomica]

Well, anyone, in a manner of speaking. I am not sure closed community means what you think it means. The young people go to school, college and the pub among a million other places. They live in West London.

I realise that - but a lot of the boys in the last program said they would never marry a girl from outside the community. Presumably they would sleep with them though - which just raises more questions about attitudes to women.

e2a; the girl getting married stopped going to school at 11. i know that kids younger than that from the site round here don't go to school (definately not full time anyway) because the young lad knocks on my door (probably about 10) to ask if we've got anything we want taking away (old tellys etc).

 

[Chairman Meow]

I've worked with a couple of traveller women who claimed that domestic violence and sexual abuse were endemic in the traveller cOmmunity. Both had been disowned by their families for speaking out about their experiences.

Yeah, I got that impression when they asked the two girls what kind of man the wanted to marry, and one of them said ''one that doesn't beat you'!

I liked Swanley until he laughed about being directed to the P*** wedding. Then wore a vest to cut the cake.

 

[girasol]

I realise that - but a lot of the boys in the last program said they would never marry a girl from outside the community. Presumably they would sleep with them though - which just raises more questions about attitudes to women.

A lot of their attitudes are very much the same as the mainstream attitudes of the 40s/50s I thought... With men having carte blanche to do as they pleased... Still, I'll continue to reserve judgement until I watch a bit more.

 

[5t3IIa]

I realise that - but a lot of the boys in the last program said they would never marry a girl from outside the community. Presumably they would sleep with them though - which just raises more questions about attitudes to women.

Oh, I do apologise. I thought you were going to say something insightful. Sorry to bother you

 

[spawnofsatan]

The best bit was Swanley getting lost on the way to the church, no one else notice the massive Sat-Nav stuck to his windscreen

 

[radio_atomica]

Oh, I do apologise. I thought you were going to say something insightful. Sorry to bother you

no sorry

 

[gabi]

aww I thought swanley was ace.

Ace?!

Leaving aside being racist, sexist AND thick as two hundred short planks, what else was ace about him?

 

[radio_atomica]

Ace?!

Leaving aside being racist, sexist AND thick as two hundred short planks, what else was ace about him?

cutting the wedding cake in his vest...

 

[skyscraper101]

Interesting the tradition of children arriving by themselves to communion. What's that all about?

 

[keithy]

I liked that he asked what the non-racist way to say "it's a fucking Paki wedding!!" would be.

 

[skyscraper101]

Before correcting himself by saying 'Indian'

 

[5t3IIa]

Interesting the tradition of children arriving by themselves to communion. What's that all about?

That's about as interesting as whether one opens their Christmas presents in the morning or waits 'til after The Queen's Speech

 

[rutabowa]

Before correcting himself by saying 'Indian'

no, that was the guy making the documentary who corrected him by saying that.

 

[5t3IIa]

Before correcting himself by saying 'Indian'

The Guardian reading programme maker suggested that, dipshit

 

[rutabowa]

The Guardian reading programme maker suggested that, dipshit

the programme makers were racist too! it all makes sense.

 

[skyscraper101]

That's about as interesting as whether one opens their Christmas presents in the morning or waits 'til after The Queen's Speech

Well I'm interested. What's the deal with that? For a community that's so protective over its children, it seems odd that they're happy to let them make their own way to a massive ceremony like communion on their own with only a limo driver as adult supervision.