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GB News: a thread so you never have to watch it

The Irish Times has published a piece, taking the piss out of GB News' Euros coverage, worth reading in full for a laugh.



:D :D :D

ome full-time on Saturday there was a heap of chat about who had been the man of the evening, Harry Kane, Luke Shaw and Raheem Sterling the chief contenders for the award. Not one of them, though, had put in a shift like former England international Luther Blissett on GB News, his appearance as a panellist on Tonight Live with Nana Akua lasting a whole three hours.

So drained did he appear to be by the end of it, you had your doubts about whether he’d be fit for the semi-finals.

Psychotherapist Lucy Beresford, Luther’s fellow panellist, talked about what a unifying experience it was for the country to be following England’s thus-far-rampant Euro 2020 journey, how “there’s something quite powerful about everyone watching the game right now because we’ve got so used to streaming things and watching them when we want to”.

This was a good point, the only problem being that Luther, Lucy and Nana weren’t among those enjoying the unifying experience of watching the game live because Nana’s show started just as the second half was kicking off.

Luther, then, was being asked to analyse a game that he couldn’t actually see, only Nana’s updates – “breaking news, it’s 2-0 to England!” – letting him know the score.

Once it hit 4-0 she headed over to reporter Duncan Sleightholme who was stationed at Plymouth Argyle’s Home Park stadium where 600 people had gathered to watch the game on a big screen.

GB News, which has kind of been billed as a channel for non-woke people, has been quite rudely ridiculed for rarely captioning the location of its reporters accurately, but that was probably just a teething issue in its early days that will since have been sorted.

Coincidence​


Any way, Duncan was in Plymouth, the caption saying “Hull”, and was overcome by the avalanche of goals.

“We’re losing track here – we had a goal and then another goal and then another goal and then another goal,” he said. “And what a great night to be called Harry – three of those goals were scored by people called Harry!”

“That is a bit of coincidence, isn’t it,” said Nana.

She then returned to her panel, asking Luther “are Wales out yet”, while admiring the Aston Villa shirt Lucy had just pulled on. “I thought it was a Queens Park Rangers shirt, same colours,” she said.

While waiting for the final whistle, she parked football for a moment. “Another injury – is it time for Harrison Ford to hang up his whip?”

By now, Luther had the look of a broken man.

He was revived, though, when Nana told him they had clips of England’s four goals. First they showed the fourth, then the third, then the second, then the second again, then the first, then the fourth again, then the first, etc. By now, GB News viewers thought England had won 26-0.

Back to Duncan in Plymouth/Hull where he found a very merry beer-wielding lady called Debbie to chat to. She, too, was confused about the scoreline. “We scored FOUR goals,” she bellowed, while holding up five fingers.

Feel the energy​


Then it was up to “North Berwick” to speak by Zoom to Harry Redknapp, who lives in Bournemouth. “So many Harrys tonight,” said Nana, this one declaring the performance to be “triffic”.

Then a quick debate about a school that has made smiling compulsory for students, before heading to the Dun Cow pub in Durham to speak to landlady Jill who said the evening had been “brilliant” apart from when her customers jumped up four times to celebrate England goals when Covid regulations stipulate they should remain seated. “I can feel the energy,” said Nana.

Back to Duncan in Hull/Plymouth/North Berwick/Saigon who had three young ladies with him.

“Itsh aaaamaszhin,” said one.

“Why is it amazing,” asked Duncan.

“BECOSH FUTBOWL’S CLUMMIN’ HOOOOOOME!”

Luther smiled, by then also sensing football was coming home, but after those three hours, you’d a notion home was the only place he wanted to be.


Hang on, Luther Blissett was on GB News? Are we sure it was the actual footballer and not just some Italians on a wind-up again?
 
BARB figures for the second full week of GB News have been released, so here's the week 1 & 2 comparisons, both weeks were helped by the figures for the Andrew Neil show, so I would expect them to drop even further for week 3, and beyond.

The figures are for the total number of household TV sets that dipped into news channels / percentage share of households, the final figure is the 'average daily minutes', i.e. if someone only watches for 7 minutes in a week, that would be an average of 1 minute.

Week 1 (14th - 20th June)Week 2 - (21st - 27th June)
BBC News Channel7,240,000 / 11.94% share / 01:54 minutes7,292,000 / 12.03% share / 02:15 minutes
Sky News4,490,000 / 7.41% share / 01:06 minutes4,884,000 / 8.06% share / 01:12 minutes
GB News2,658,000 / 4.39% share / 01:01 minutes1,844,000 / 3.04% share / 00:47 minutes

So, GB News lost almost a third of households tuning in, and those that did, watched for almost 25% less time. :thumbs:

All in all, going well. :D
 
The Daily Mail and the Telegraph both print dangerous strains of Tory Politics. However, if you think you have been exposed to GB News I would strongly suggest ringing the NHS Emergency number.
 
The FT has firmly hit the nail on the head.

Like much of the content I’ve seen on GB News, it seemed that the channel was presenting a straw man. There was no Twitterstorm, no social media mob and no one trying to “cancel” the school. As I felt my eyes rolling to the back of my skull it dawned on me: GB News is so tedious, so lacking in nuance, so whiny and frankly so low-quality, it is actually making me more sympathetic to the cause of those they deem “woke”.

Its approach to culture-war issues is overly simplistic and dumbed down, making them appear trivial, while its constant need to find new outrage dilutes the impact some of its stories might otherwise have. “Surely that’s Hollywood saying gender can’t exist?” declared Dan Wootton during a discussion about Disney World removing “boys and girls” from its greeting so as to be more inclusive. I felt my eyeballs going.

During Monday evening’s “Woke Watch” on Britain’s newest broadcaster, GB News, presenter Colin Brazier railed about how a primary school had temporarily deleted its Twitter account after some negative responses to a video it had made to encourage England’s football squad.

“These were not hooligans . . . but exuberant kids enjoying a lesson in music video production,” sighed Brazier. “It’s a reminder to those in positions of authority in public life . . . that they shouldn’t be cowed by a tiny handful of po-faced types. A couple of angry tweets do not a Twitterstorm make.”

Given that there were just a couple of tweets it seemed an odd story to use for this segment in which presenters highlight supposedly egregious examples of morality policing and overzealous social activism. Even odder was that GB News then contradicted Brazier, promoting his rant by describing a “Twitterstorm” in reaction to the school video.

Like much of the content I’ve seen on GB News, it seemed that the channel was presenting a straw man. There was no Twitterstorm, no social media mob and no one trying to “cancel” the school. As I felt my eyes rolling to the back of my skull it dawned on me: GB News is so tedious, so lacking in nuance, so whiny and frankly so low-quality, it is actually making me more sympathetic to the cause of those they deem “woke”.

For a channel that is so dedicated to fighting “woke warriors”, I’m not sure my reaction is quite what GB News would be hoping for. They might be particularly disappointed to learn that I am someone who myself has been accused of being “anti-woke” (a categorisation I dislike because I resent the framing of the whole debate) due to my criticism of what I consider to be the censorious, insincere, inconsistent and detrimental brand of social justice activism that is currently sweeping across many institutions in the west.

And it seems it’s not just me finding this perma-culture-wars channel exhausting. One contact, who voted for both Brexit and Boris Johnson, told me: “I was hoping for ‘Spectator TV,’” referring to the conservative magazine, “but instead . . . it’s just tedious, dull and obvious,” adding that its production values “make the BBC look like the Royal Opera House”. Another, who voted the same way, called it “unwatchable”.

Having started strongly, the channel’s viewing figures have fallen. It pulled in a total of 1.8m viewers in the most recent week, according to data from the Broadcasters’ Audience Research Board, down from 2.6m the previous week and compared with ratings of 7.3m for BBC News and 4.9m for Sky News. Its primetime numbers are reportedly five times lower than those for the Welsh language version of the children’s cartoon Paw Patrol.

But despite what many on the left might allege — such as campaign group Stop Funding Hate, which convinced a handful of virtue-signalling companies to pull adverts from the channel — the problem with GB News is not, as far as I can see, that it’s hate-filled. While it might be trying to emulate America’s Fox News, British broadcasting laws require news channels to be impartial, and its presenting roster strikes me as more diverse in terms of ethnicity, gender and social class than its competitors. It also features commentators from across the political spectrum in almost all its panel discussions.

The problem with GB News is that it just isn’t very good. From endless technical glitches to dim lighting, echoey audio and a lack of on-screen chemistry between presenters, the channel has none of the gloss that makes Fox so compelling, and not enough gravitas to make up for it.

Its approach to culture-war issues is overly simplistic and dumbed down, making them appear trivial, while its constant need to find new outrage dilutes the impact some of its stories might otherwise have. “Surely that’s Hollywood saying gender can’t exist?” declared Dan Wootton during a discussion about Disney World removing “boys and girls” from its greeting so as to be more inclusive. I felt my eyeballs going.

I wrote last year that people shouldn’t worry about GB News reshaping the UK political and media landscape as Fox News has in the US because there is not the same media vacuum on the right in Britain. What I didn’t consider was that GB News could inadvertently help the cause it complains about so incessantly.

 
Farage has been spotted at loose in John Major's care in the community in a very silly waistcoat on GMB News. The 4 viewers must be in rapture like the return of Jesus to the earth when the apocalypse happens because of climate change.
 
Farage has been spotted at loose in John Major's care in the community in a very silly waistcoat on GMB News. The 4 viewers must be in rapture like the return of Jesus to the earth when the apocalypse happens because of climate change.
Yes, I thought I'd give it my weekly peep and quickly left.
 
No announcement on the return of Andrew Neil, which means he will be away for longer than he was actually on-air, which doesn't look good, considering he's the channel's figurehead, as chairman.

I am looking forward to seeing their week 3 viewing figures, when they are released tomorrow, I forecast another drop.
 
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No announcement on the return of Andrew Neil, which means he will be away for longer than he was actually on-air, which doesn't look good, considering he's the channel's figurehead, as chairman.

I am looking forward to seeing their week 3 viewing figures, when they as released tomorrow, I forecast another drop.
Dropping like the Dropkick Murphys
 
Andrew Neil is the Captain Oates of GBNews. He may be gone for some time.
3096186516_53c4022d47_b.jpg


Neil Oliver is the heir to Captain Scott. He's probably already started eating the huskies.
 
Want a laugh?

Week 3 figures as out, the figures are for the total number of household TV sets that dipped into news channels / percentage share of households, the final figure is the 'average daily minutes', i.e. if someone only watches for 7 minutes in a week, that would be an average of 1 minute.

2i.png

Week 3 (28th June - 4th July)Week 4 (coming next week)
BBC News Channel7,503,000 / 12.37% share / 02:16 minutes
Sky News4,412,000 / 7.28% share / 01:11 minutes
GB News1,352,000 / 2.23% share / 00:31 minutes

Basically, the number of households tuning in are half that of the first week, and those are watching for half the time too!

It's going so well. :D
 
Want a laugh?

Week 3 figures as out, the figures are for the total number of household TV sets that dipped into news channels / percentage share of households, the final figure is the 'average daily minutes', i.e. if someone only watches for 7 minutes in a week, that would be an average of 1 minute.

View attachment 278276

Week 3 (28th June - 4th July)Week 4 (coming next week)
BBC News Channel7,503,000 / 12.37% share / 02:16 minutes
Sky News4,412,000 / 7.28% share / 01:11 minutes
GB News1,352,000 / 2.23% share / 00:31 minutes

Basically, the number of households tuning in are half that of the first week, and those are watching for half the time too!

It's going so well. :D
But you just know that they're going to try and spin this into some kind of "mainstream is cancelling us" kind of narrative. I wouldn't be surprised if they try to gussie up some idea that somehow people not watching them is silencing them...
 
I finally switched over to the channel for the first time, against my better judgement.

I seem to be watching a presenter (Dewberry?) droning on about BBC salaries with some Taxpayer Alliance geek. Just re-airing tired grudges. But really badly. They really are shit at this.

No more. I lasted less than ten minutes. I hope they all fall into a slurry pit.
 
Want a laugh?

Week 3 figures as out, the figures are for the total number of household TV sets that dipped into news channels / percentage share of households, the final figure is the 'average daily minutes', i.e. if someone only watches for 7 minutes in a week, that would be an average of 1 minute.

View attachment 278276

Week 3 (28th June - 4th July)Week 4 (coming next week)
BBC News Channel7,503,000 / 12.37% share / 02:16 minutes
Sky News4,412,000 / 7.28% share / 01:11 minutes
GB News1,352,000 / 2.23% share / 00:31 minutes

Basically, the number of households tuning in are half that of the first week, and those are watching for half the time too!

It's going so well. :D
Surprised it's still going at all to be honest
 
I finally switched over to the channel for the first time, against my better judgement.

I seem to be watching a presenter (Dewberry?) droning on about BBC salaries with some Taxpayer Alliance geek. Just re-airing tired grudges. But really badly. They really are shit at this.

No more. I lasted less than ten minutes. I hope they all fall into a slurry pit.
No surprise to see the taxdodgers alliance popping up, although it’s not as though the BBC hasn’t given them a frequent platform for the last couple of decades.
 
I thought they were going to be a proper news channel, with actual news bulletins, and a helicopter over Whitehall during demos from where they point out the woke maskless rentamobs viciously tripping up police horses with their bodies. When there wasn't much political news to talk about I thought they'd have other actual news, like coastal flooding or something, perhaps putting their spin on it by suggesting foreign aid could be redirected to build flood defences.

But no, it seems they don't do any news at all, it's just endless chitchat manufacturing outrage about marginal topics that bear no relation to the headlines that other news organisations are carrying.
 
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