Your DJ stories, "DJ assistants" and more

[twentythreedom]

Dave angel had a fella what done did that

Edited: pic of Dave Angel in a hat replaced with pic of Dave Angel in a hat

 

[DaveCinzano]

View attachment 64271

See three posts back

 

[twentythreedom]

That'll teach me to not read threads through. Probably

Although great minds etc

 

[Enviro]

I once helped DJ Zinc to get to his car after he played a set at a small festival in Manchester. Maybe I should put that on my CV

 

[DaveCinzano]

great minds

Let's not run before we can walk, captain

 

[Yelkcub]

I appeared on flyers for a number of major clubs for a few years while carrying out less actual duties than my 'assistant'.

 

[JTG]

I once helped DJ Zinc to get to his car after he played a set at a small festival in Manchester. Maybe I should put that on my CV

I once told DJ Fresh to go away when he wanted help to find his manager. I'm definitely putting that on mine

 

[DaveCinzano]

DJ E********e asked me if I would like to assist him in smoking some crack whilst he was waiting to play at a pirate radio station I was hanging about at (I politely declined).

 

[JTG]

DJ Campbell once asked me if I wanted to help him fix the results of some football matches

(Heh heh, not really Mr Lawyer, just joshing!)

 

[Blagsta]

I once helped Sister Bliss (her from Faithless) do The Guardian crossword

 

[DaveCinzano]

I once helped Sister Bliss (her from Faithless) do The Guardian crossword

Quick or cryptic?

 

[krtek a houby]

Those Moonies have some serious sets.

Yeah but the sect is great

 

[Blagsta]

Quick or cryptic?

The quick one.

 

[pinkmonkey]

 

[DaveCinzano]

The quick one.

Took you twenty minutes to answer that, the omens are not good

 

[stuff_it]

I've been told that a) I was on the DJ list for Alchemy, so I should have gone and that b) my other half was down as my assistant. Since I can't mix for toffee and he can we can surmise that the DJ Assistant is there to mix the records for a useless munted twat of a DJ who can't mix and didn't know they were playing until after the event.

 

[editor]

I think I'll get a couple of DJ assistants off workfare for my next gig.

 

[Nanker Phelge]

It's the person who gets to chat up all the good looking people while you're stuck behind the decks trying to make them all dance....

I did a 6 hour set on my own at the Barfly the other week, all vinyl, I woulda liked an assistant...just to press play if I didn't make it back from the bog in time (I did make it!)

 

[lizzieloo]

Gets in the way that was my official job when mr steev was DJing

 

[editor]

It's the person who gets to chat up all the good looking people while you're stuck behind the decks trying to make them all dance....

I did a 6 hour set on my own at the Barfly the other week, all vinyl, I woulda liked an assistant...just to press play if I didn't make it back from the bog in time (I did make it!)

Piss into a bag and throw it at the crowd if you don't like the way they're dancing.

 

[Nanker Phelge]

Piss into a bag and throw it at the crowd if you don't like the way they're dancing.

I did that once and was told I was being undiplomatic...

 

[editor]

I did that once and was told I was being undiplomatic...

Get the DJ assistant to clear it up and smooth over any problems,

 

[Nanker Phelge]

He was too busy snogging some girl from Clacton in the bogs...

 

[JTG]

It's the person who gets to chat up all the good looking people while you're stuck behind the decks trying to make them all dance....

I did a 6 hour set on my own at the Barfly the other week, all vinyl, I woulda liked an assistant...just to press play if I didn't make it back from the bog in time (I did make it!)

Actually, an ex-Urbanite issued me with instructions on which CDJ to press 'play' on while he nipped to the bog at Beautiful Days the other year. He was gone ages, I had no idea when the tune playing was going to finish and had forgotten what he'd told me (I was on drugs ). I spotted him muntedly chatting away to everyone outside the tent having possibly forgotten that he was supposed to be entertaining everyone. He finally got back in just in time. Close shave.

Thus ended my career as a DJ Assistant.

 

[Enviro]

I used to help a guy run a mobile disco - setting up, playing some tunes while he had a break, etc.

The second to last time I helped him I'd not done it for about a year, and felt that I had lost what little touch I had with what sort of music the punters would expect. The critical moment came, about an hour and a half after the start of the disco, when the main man had to go and have a chat with the hotel bar manager. At the point when he left he had got everyone dancing to oldies (not my forte!), and I was having a bit of a panic over what to play next... I think I ended up going for some Jamiroquai tune or something, but the CDJ's had sticky track skip buttons and the track I ended up playing was a slow number ... I talked over the mic to introduce the track and had to pause mid sentence "That was *some oldie crowd pleaser*, now I've got .... .... a bit of a slow one for you... "

Everyone left the dance floor and some people came up to me complaining that I ruined their good time ... The main man said he'd be gone for 15-30 mins and didn't come back for an hour and a half - that was one of the longest hour and a half's of my life!

 

[twentythreedom]

:/

 

[ska invita]

I used to help a guy run a mobile disco - setting up, playing some tunes while he had a break, etc.

The second to last time I helped him I'd not done it for about a year, and felt that I had lost what little touch I had with what sort of music the punters would expect. The critical moment came, about an hour and a half after the start of the disco, when the main man had to go and have a chat with the hotel bar manager. At the point when he left he had got everyone dancing to oldies (not my forte!), and I was having a bit of a panic over what to play next... I think I ended up going for some Jamiroquai tune or something, but the CDJ's had sticky track skip buttons and the track I ended up playing was a slow number ... I talked over the mic to introduce the track and had to pause mid sentence "That was *some oldie crowd pleaser*, now I've got .... .... a bit of a slow one for you... "

Everyone left the dance floor and some people came up to me complaining that I ruined their good time ... The main man said he'd be gone for 15-30 mins and didn't come back for an hour and a half - that was one of the longest hour and a half's of my life!

ooooff.
i feel your pain

 

[ViolentPanda]

Got this email from someone wanting a gig at my night:

What the fuck could a DJ assistant do? Rack out the drugs? Get the beers in? Press play when told to?>

Hold the DJ's piss bottle if the DJ needs a between-sets wazz. Rims the DJ if the DJ hasn't wiped properly. That sort of thing.

 

[stuff_it]

tbh i wouldn't employ as a dj anyone who said anything about deejays. and i am not entirely certain a rave is necessarily a private event.

It's always a "private event" occifer!

 

[hipipol]

wears shite like this