Golf. Do you hate it?
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heinous seamus
Perfect in an empty room
Spotted this top piece of utter bellendry on the bbc website this morning:
"Veteran BBC golf commentator Peter Alliss said women who want to play at Muirfield should "marry a member" in order to play.
He also said he had spoken to the wives of Muirfield members and claimed there was "a look of horror" on their faces when he suggested they might be able to become members in their own right.
He reckoned they did not want to become members because they would have to start paying for something they currently got for free.
"The women who are there as wives of husbands, they get all the facilities," he told BBC Radio 5 live. "If somebody wants to join, well you'd better get married to somebody who's a member."
Alliss, 85, said he understood why members had failed to vote in large enough numbers to overturn the ban on women members.
"Clubs were formed years ago by people of like spirit - doctors, lawyers, accountants, bakers, butchers - and they joined in like spirit to talk amongst themselves and do whatever," he said.
"I want to join the Women's Voluntary Service, but unless I have pieces snipped away from my whatever, I'm not going to be able to get in."
Nobhead.
"Veteran BBC golf commentator Peter Alliss said women who want to play at Muirfield should "marry a member" in order to play.
He also said he had spoken to the wives of Muirfield members and claimed there was "a look of horror" on their faces when he suggested they might be able to become members in their own right.
He reckoned they did not want to become members because they would have to start paying for something they currently got for free.
"The women who are there as wives of husbands, they get all the facilities," he told BBC Radio 5 live. "If somebody wants to join, well you'd better get married to somebody who's a member."
Alliss, 85, said he understood why members had failed to vote in large enough numbers to overturn the ban on women members.
"Clubs were formed years ago by people of like spirit - doctors, lawyers, accountants, bakers, butchers - and they joined in like spirit to talk amongst themselves and do whatever," he said.
"I want to join the Women's Voluntary Service, but unless I have pieces snipped away from my whatever, I'm not going to be able to get in."
Nobhead.
There's plenty of them about - and not all old farts either.
Johnny Canuck3
Well-Known Member
I've got a job where a lot of people play golf. I've never played a game of golf in my life.
When I finally stop working, I'm looking forward to being able to say: "I went the whole time, and didn't play one single game of golf." I will consider it a small but meaningful [non]achievement.
When I finally stop working, I'm looking forward to being able to say: "I went the whole time, and didn't play one single game of golf." I will consider it a small but meaningful [non]achievement.
Johnny Canuck3
Well-Known Member
A while ago, I was at a private golf club, picking up someone who was working there. While I was waiting, I was looking at the photos and trophies. At some point, I made an imaginary golf swing. Like air guitar, but air golf.
Some golfer saw me, and made a jovial joking comment.
I thought, 'Now I'm joking with fucking golfers. I'm already into this too deep for my liking."
Driving ranges are different, though. I've been to driving ranges. It's fun to whack a ball. If you do it right, it makes a satisfying sound. A weird rubber/plastic/metal impact sound.
I even bought a driver at Walmart for $7. It had a big head, and was kind of wobbly.
So I'm at a driving range, and this guy compliments me on one of my hits, and tells me about his clubs. They even have special names, and they cost a fuckload of money. But he couldn't drive a ball as far as I could.
He asks me what brand club I use. I say: "I don't know what brand it is - I got it at Walmart, and it cost me $7."
Some golfer saw me, and made a jovial joking comment.
I thought, 'Now I'm joking with fucking golfers. I'm already into this too deep for my liking."
Driving ranges are different, though. I've been to driving ranges. It's fun to whack a ball. If you do it right, it makes a satisfying sound. A weird rubber/plastic/metal impact sound.
I even bought a driver at Walmart for $7. It had a big head, and was kind of wobbly.
So I'm at a driving range, and this guy compliments me on one of my hits, and tells me about his clubs. They even have special names, and they cost a fuckload of money. But he couldn't drive a ball as far as I could.
He asks me what brand club I use. I say: "I don't know what brand it is - I got it at Walmart, and it cost me $7."
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The Octagon
Stop...Hammertime
Hell of a round from Stenson, deserved winner, 63 in the final round, unbelievable
Wilf
Slouching towards Billingham
True, but it loses a few points for having the word 'golf' in it.
Mogden
I like tea
I don't follow sport avidly but this weekend I was torn with the cricket, TdF and the golf. I nearly went with TMS this morning. Glad I stuck with the golf!! That was an incredible round. Mickelson was proper gutted when interviewed. Any other Open year, bar 4, he would have won with that score.
Dr. Furface
One small step for me
That really was something special - the greatest final round in Open, or majors, history. The lowest ever winning score, the winning score equaling the best ever round in a major, and the top two players obliterating the rest of the field. Two great sportsmen at the top of their game, going head to head and giving everything. Sadly one of them had to lose, but I'm pleased Stenson won as he's been a top player for years and never managed to win a major, and better still that it didn't go to a playoff. Commiserations to Mickleson, but he already has an Open (and a few other majors) and there's no disgrace to lose like he did today. Incredible stuff.
The Octagon
Stop...Hammertime
RIP Arnold Palmer, the game's first superstar 
US golf legend Arnold Palmer dies at 87 - BBC News
Could see in recent years his health was going, but 87 isn't bad in fairness.
Also managed to fit in inventing a cocktail too
US golf legend Arnold Palmer dies at 87 - BBC News
Could see in recent years his health was going, but 87 isn't bad in fairness.
Also managed to fit in inventing a cocktail too
The Octagon
Stop...Hammertime
Sergio finally wins a major, great final day, some stunning golf 
Unlucky for Rose but at least he's already got one.
Unlucky for Rose but at least he's already got one.
bi0boy
Power User
Sergio finally wins a major, great final day, some stunning golf
Unlucky for Rose but at least he's already got one.
What was stunning about it? Let me guess...did he keep hitting the ball until it went into the hole? And then he did it again, and again?
What a star!
maomao
普費斯
According to my colleague it was truly crazy unbelievable stuff. But when he explained further it turned out that they had in fact been hitting little balls repeatedly with sticks until they went into holes. He'd made it sound like they'd successfully fought off an alien invasion or had an orgy on the course or something.
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gosub
~#
Sergio finally wins a major, great final day, some stunning golf
Unlucky for Rose but at least he's already got one.
Back in the village Rose and I grew up in. (vaguely knew him). All the golf bores were aghast at being kicked out the pub at normal time, with him being so close to not winning a new coat.
bi0boy
Power User
It's almost like the golf we know is just a faint farcical memory of real golf, which involved tactical play such as merping your shots near the bunkers forcing your opponents to gramble towards the flag from outwith the sharm line before you could lay the green with a cunning flip-back or counter-shot. It's so sad that get-it-in-the-hole is all that survives of what was once a great game.
skyscraper101
0891 50 50 50
Yep I hate it too.
I think my opinion was formed from a very early age by having a golf enthusiastic granddad who tried to instil a love of the game in me from an early age (golf lessons, golf club for christmas etc). Meanwhile I wasn't allowed to wear or be inside his clubhouse if I had jeans on like a proper Alan Partidge country club situation. I sided against the whole established culture of it then like my Dad and have never once regretted it.
My grandad is in his mid 80s now with memory issues, and I go and look after him. The one good thing about golf is I can stick it on telly in the evening where it'll be live from America and it lasts like 4 or 5 hours. The next day, they'll repeat the whole thing on Sky Sports 4 or something and he'll have forgotten he's already watched it. Keeps him entertained for hours.
I think my opinion was formed from a very early age by having a golf enthusiastic granddad who tried to instil a love of the game in me from an early age (golf lessons, golf club for christmas etc). Meanwhile I wasn't allowed to wear or be inside his clubhouse if I had jeans on like a proper Alan Partidge country club situation. I sided against the whole established culture of it then like my Dad and have never once regretted it.
My grandad is in his mid 80s now with memory issues, and I go and look after him. The one good thing about golf is I can stick it on telly in the evening where it'll be live from America and it lasts like 4 or 5 hours. The next day, they'll repeat the whole thing on Sky Sports 4 or something and he'll have forgotten he's already watched it. Keeps him entertained for hours.
The Octagon
Stop...Hammertime
maomao
普費斯
This is the 'Golf, do you hate it?' thread. Do you need the rules explaining?
The Octagon
Stop...Hammertime
Answer: No, I personally don't.
The question makes all the difference, so seems like I'm fine rule-wise, thanks
You're familiar with another sport called 'football' of course? I assume you feel the same about that, given the basic 'goal' is the same? Perhaps you simply don't like sport in general?
bi0boy
Power User
With football you have to work with your team mates against the other team to score a goal.
Imagine how boring football would be with only one team with one player in it.
