Disastrous family seasonal attractions and the never to be forgotten Lapland New Forest Theme Park

[ExtraRefined]

Seasonal bump

On a related note

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/topics/c...-Grotto-staff-over-invalid-Groupon-offer.html

 

[pogofish]

I see the original "Lapland" UK is getting a hammering from consumers this year - Looks like price/popularity have shot through the roof and the craks are beginning to show.

 

[Badgers]

On a related note

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/topics/c...-Grotto-staff-over-invalid-Groupon-offer.html

The grumpy grotto group shouted at a woman dressed as a Christmas Tree

but

 

[Badgers]

Sorry for the pointless bump but this is still making laugh so much. Lest we forget.

 

[xes]

I wonder if the olympics closing ceremony could be done under the same legal shnizzle....

 

[longdog]

Sorry for the pointless bump but this is still making laugh so much. Lest we forget.

We will never forget. When I'm sitting in god's waiting room and the local infants school bring their annual tin of alphabetti-spaghetti for harvest festival they will gather around the by now 158 year old longdog and clamour for his recollections of the 21st century.

"Tell us about the time you won your fifth Victoria Cross during the Third World War!" They'll cry.

"Fuck off!" I'll say "has anybody seen my fag lighter?"

"Tell us about the time you saved the environment by inventing a machine that turned atmospheric CO2 in to Polo Mints" They'll beg.

"Go away you little brats" I'll say "Where the fuck is that bottle of gin? Or did I finish it?"

"Tell us about the time you devised a vaccine which cured cancer, reversed autism, increased intelligence by a factor of five and gave politicians eternal life and excruciatingly painful and untreatable piles!"

"Are you shower of bastards still here?" I'll grumble "Piss off or I'll shove my walking stick up your nose!"

"Then please Uncle Doggy, please tell us about Lapland New Forest!" They'll plead, their eyes becoming moist with disappointed tears.

"Are you all sitting comfortably?"

 

[free spirit]

Sorry for the pointless bump but this is still making laugh so much. Lest we forget.

was it the olympic closing ceremony that reminded you of this thread?

 

[Badgers]

was it the olympic closing ceremony that reminded you of this thread?

Well.....

 

[skyscraper101]

I will never, ever, tire of this thread being bumped.

 

[Badgers]

I will never, ever, tire of this thread being bumped.

Me too

 

[plurker]

Me neither

 

[Firky]

I wonder how much that lad was paid to play angry birds in court

 

[Stanley Edwards]

Still brilliant Britain at its best. Makes me wonder why I left.

 

[Badgers]

 

[Badgers]

Anyone seen any adverts for a 2013 Christmas theme park yet?

 

[Badgers]

Bahnhof Strasse

 

[Mation]

Oh god - I'm so busy at work doing Important and Serious Things, but popped in for a two-minute break, made the mistake of looking at this thread again and now I can't stop giggling. I'm crying. It's giving me away.

 

[colacubes]

The festive season is upon us

 

[TopCat]

How crap does a Christmas event have to be before the police can be called? I am thinking this year of any Pantomime that has that cunt Jim Davidson involved, any shop that gets decorations up in November, shops that force their staff to listen to looped Christmas songs for over a month. Kill them all.

 

[Badgers]

The "bustling" Christmas market consisted of about four stalls, one woman told the BBC, and she had to pay further money to gain entry to it.

 

[Bahnhof Strasse]

Anyone seen any adverts for a 2013 Christmas theme park yet?

Pimlico plumbers were putting out their decorations this morning. tbf their offering on a roof near Waterloo is far superior to Lapland new Forest's. But really, it's still SEPTEMBER

 

[pogofish]

Anyone seen any adverts for a 2013 Christmas theme park yet?

How could you miss them:

https://www.gulliversfun.co.uk/warrington/events/christmas-at-gullivers-30-nov-to-31-dec-2013.htm
http://www.altontowers.com/short-breaks/christmas-breaks/
https://paultonspark.co.uk/christma...php/upcoming-events/the-christmas-experience/

And of course the much imitated Lapland UK has shifted to a new home:

http://www.laplanduk.co.uk/

 

[pogofish]

Pimlico plumbers were putting out their decorations this morning. tbf their offering on a roof near Waterloo is far superior to Lapland new Forest's. But really, it's still SEPTEMBER

Even my local butcher is getting the decorations-up - I went for a pound of mince and a Dingwall Pudding today to be greeted by flying Santas and golden beasties!

 

[spliff]

I was in Gloucester earlier in the month and saw xmas chocolates on display, I made a beeline for them assuming them to be cheapo out of date stock. But hey! I'm an idiot.

http://www.gloucestercitizen.co.uk/...b-Gloucester/story-19817422-detail/story.html

 

[Badgers]

 

[tufty79]

one thread, infinite joy <3

 

[Badgers]

I just wished I could have been there

 

[rubbershoes]

Anyone seen any adverts for a 2013 Christmas theme park yet?

I saw Father Christmas in a parade on Saturday. I'm surprised his robes are back from the dry cleaners after last year's messiness

 

[Voley]

"Usually used for banger racing".

 

[el-ahrairah]

I just wished I could have been there

maybe we should open "The Lapland New Forest Experience - an authentically crap tribute to the world's crappest festive theme park".

"Our Santa is a drunk, our elves have cancer, and the huskies have been run over in the car park. Bring your own snow."