BK You say in your article in the Sunday Times:
"People later asked me what it was like. They said they couldn’t imagine it. For a long time I couldn’t say. It was like a dream you can’t remember, a puzzle you can’t solve. But then I saw a television documentary about the bombings. Immediately I began to have flashbacks."
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,2092-1892288_2,00.html
Okay, I can see how this reads
when taken out of context. Let me explain: People asked exactly what it
felt, tasted, sounded like when the bomb went off. Up until the 7/7 documentary I had managed to avoid going into vivid concscious details, though I had horrific dreams. The film however triggered taste/sound/visual horror-flashbacks, which I am now having EMDR treatment for. I
use 'flashbacks' here in the medical sense of the word as a PTSD symptom of
overwhelming physical re-experiencing of the event in an inappropriate setting ( such as when writing at a desk having just seen a film) . Not in the film -maker'' use of the word as a narrative device, a way of adding in additional detail or generating false memory.
Recently I have been having CBT and specific trauma therapy, to deal with the after-effects of what I saw and have only just been able to bear to think about in detail.The reason I had been blocking the specific details of the explosion and just how horrific it was, was because the memories were, frankly, unbearable, as was the accompanying visual, rational memory of a desperately injured passenger - a dying man - whom I, a First Aider- couldn't save and in fact walked away from, when evacuating the train. The visceral, physical, adrenalised flashbacks of the taste of blood, smell of peroxide hair and meat and taste of choking smoke - brought
this image back too, which is why I spent 4 month exhausting myself trying to block it out. Some things are too much to deal with all at once and take time, do you see? That's why we have the survivor group - people are in many cases just starting to come out of shock and start to process the grief, survivor guilt and fear.
My memory of getting on the train, the bomb, the aftermath is all fine - it is just the brief minutes after the bomb itself exploded behind me and I fell to the floor in total darkness, then struggled to my feet - that I have blocked out the
feelings for. An immensely violent, physical experience, it was not experienced rationally, like a documentary maker or a journalist, it was experienced through the senses and the body and is hard to put into words.
I have given you a lot of info here in good faith, and I hope that you will share it with other theorists if you will accept it as a refutation of your theories by a survivor who has access to more information than you, and is a credible witness.
It may be an exciting game to you but it is not a game for us, going through all this and I am not going to keep dragging it out in order to stop the conspiracies. I will however do it here because I hope that it makes you think twice and I know, depsite the editor's best attempts, there are people using the site who seriously subscribe to some of the wilder theories doing the rounds.
Someone else who was there: "Blue Watch relive the bomb hell inside carriage 346A"
http://observer.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,6903,1588239,00.html
"It was a routine call out - but within minutes firefighter Aaron Roche and his colleagues were plunged into the carnage of the 7 July bombings. For the first time, they tell their stories"
In this article firefighter Aaron Roche tells us 11 times that the carriage he enters on the Piccadilly line is number 346A. He is also the first person to enter the carriage at 10 am. There are still injured people on the train. "Blue Watch dragged six people alive from carriage 346A, some with miraculously minor injuries. The elderly woman sustained only a sore ankle."
"It had just turned 10am when Roche began striding along the dark tunnel towards the stranded train. No one had a clue what had caused its sudden breakdown. Roche had begun to fear the worst, though, as he came across a bedraggled string of passengers, their blackened, bleeding faces almost invisible in the choking clouds of smoke"
Easy. It is my understanding that '346A' is the name that the carriage has been given in the criminal investigation as an exhibit/murder scene and that is what the ruin of the carriage I was travelling in is known as these days.
Suspicious of why a carriage number should be mentioned in a headline and in a story so many times, I checked this carriage number with Clive D W Feather of Davros fame
http://www.davros.org/rail/culg/
I wrote:
>> The Observer carried a long article quoting firemen who attended the
>>scene on the Piccadilly line and going into carriage 346A, are the
>>carriages numbered differently to the trains?
He wrote:
The Piccadilly Line train consisted of the following vehicles:
166-566-366-417-617-217
Car 166 was the one holding the bomb.
No mention of a carriage 346A.
See above. It's a total and utter non-issue.
Another survivor story on the BBC:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/4659293.stm
"But then it sounded like another train had come up behind us and the carriage filled with smoke again and people became really, really frightened."
As I have already indicated, these are just a few of the many inconsitencies in the official narrative
Firstly - not an 'official narrative' at all but a witness account, posted shortly after the event by a traumatised witness who wasn't in the carriage with the bomb but much further down the train. Jacqui Head was in carriage 5, I know her, she's in my group. She and some of the others in carriage 5 thought at one time that they were being 'bumped ' by a train approaching behind, certainly they began to fear this after being trapped underground with no word from the driver for ages and no info and not knowing they had been bombed because it hadn't gone off in their carriage. The banging they heard from carriage 6 was the panicking passengers in the carriage thundering at the glass and the doors with all their might, with their hands, umbrella, swith as much force as they could muster.
Anymore tripe about the
iccadilly line suicide bombings you feel like throwing out? I can't say I enjoy this, but anything to stop the lies, which I find deeply insulting. To go through this is one thing, to be made out to be a liar by conspiracy theorists is almost unforgivable.