Colonoscopy - Toilet status: those updates you need to know

[dessiato]

Probably yes. But then toilets are household items.

*Actually I put it here with a silly title as I was shit scared things were going to turn out badly. I'll rename/move later.

Leave it here. It's doing its job. Giving us some smiles, and some relief to know you're fine.

 

[UrbaneFox]

Shouldn't this be in knobbing and sobbing?

It should be a sticky, for all those with cameras facing where the sun don't shine

Did I tell you about the time I had a camera in my bladder?

 

[Supine]

Great news editor

 

[twentythreedom]

my gp is also my inernist

I initially read that as "my GP is also my Leninist"

My GP is chair of the local green party fwiw

 

[Ming]

Excellent news ed!

 

[editor]

It should be a sticky, for all those with cameras facing where the sun don't shine

Did I tell you about the time I had a camera in my bladder?

I'll 'Colonoscopy' to the title in the hope it might help anyone else facing an imminent botty-pap invasion.

 

[SheilaNaGig]

Why the fuck is this is Suburban!?

The lavatory should be two closable doors away from the fridge.

 

[SheilaNaGig]

(Having said that, I wish you well editor . I’ve also had this procedure and mooed like a cow in labour while it was happening.)

 

[weepiper]

Very pleased to hear all is well editor

 

[cyril_smear]

I'm sat at home all day/night and thought I may as well share the moment.

So, tomorrow morning I have to go to hospital for a check up that necessitates a, err, clearing of the decks beforehand. I can't eat till after the check up (noon tomorrow) and I had my first sachet of CitraFleet 45 mins ago.

Things are a-bubbling 'down there' quietly but it doesn't feel like I'm sat on a volcano yet. Anyone with experience of these things have an idea when I may have to race to the loo?

*Please note there will be no graphic images here. I'm just tryig to make light of what is quite literally a shitty day.

I think I had to have four sachets of this horrible salty stuff... I managed about 2 sachets(it tasted awful) and felt nothing for hours until kablowee... Next two hours sat on the bog. And of course you need food cause ya stomachs empty but you're not allowed

 

[cyril_smear]

I've now more or less back to normal and am breathing an almighty sigh of relief. I'd gone for a colonoscopy after my doctor found a few niggling things that could have suggested cancer - throw in the fact that my dad died of related cancer at just 36 years old - and alarm bells were ringing.

I was at King's College Hospital and was once again reminded of the wonders of the NHS service where I was attended by people from a host of nationalities, all of whom were professional and friendly. The only downside was the young nurse who was terrible at getting that 'tap' thing into my vein. That hurt!

The first sedative had a very strange effect on me, and I ended up on the corridor floor in a gibbering mess. I usually love the stuff they dish out before treatment but this was horrible - I was sweating profusely, dizzy and unable to speak or walk. No fun. Happily I was shovelled promptly on to a very comfy bed.

45 mins later I was wheeled into the room where the colonoscopy was to take place. It was bright, stacked full of modern tech with at least 4 people attending to my needs. Despite my earlier reluctance, I was fascinated seeing my back end gubbins appearing 2ft high on the screen - at times it looked like the cameras was a whizzing through a HR Giger film set.

I'd been topped up with more sedatives at this point - and had one of those oxygen feeds under my nose - but it was pretty much totally painless.

They took a few random samples as a precaution as the camera moved around and then told me the most wonderful thing of all - I was declared all clear!

PHEW!

"Oh yes, the midazolam will make you not remember the procedure"

Lies!!

 

[May Kasahara]

So glad you've had the all clear editor. I had the bumcam five years ago as my cousin died young from bowel cancer, and while the cam was an unpleasant experience it certainly wasn't anywhere near as grim as bowel cancer would be. In fact you have reminded me to contact the hospital as I'm due for a five year follow up.

Long life and happiness to you

 

[UrbaneFox]

Why the fuck is this is Suburban!?

The lavatory should be two closable doors away from the fridge.

But it's at the bottomist end of the opposite same speculum, or speculaa. Spector

 

[twentythreedom]

I had the same experience a few months back, editor - laxatives and then a lubed up camera the tradesmen's entrance with HD vid of inside your arsehole Good times

Eat a dozen hard boiled eggs, washed down with a couple of pints of Guinness. )l9p see you right

#CaptainsLog

0)

 

[sojourner]

One of my favourite quotes of all time

Really chuffed for you Ed

 

[Chilli.s]

Good news, well done!

 

[UnderOpenSky]

So looks like I've got this to look forwards to.

Apparently I get the choice between gas or injected sedative (or nothing). Which one do you think is going to make the whole thing more bearable?

Those who've had it, how did you feel the next day? OK to work?

 

[existentialist]

So looks like I've got this to look forwards to.

Apparently I get the choice between gas or injected sedative (or nothing). Which one do you think is going to make the whole thing more bearable?

Those who've had it, how did you feel the next day? OK to work?

Regardless of what meds you get, no colonoscopy should be having effects a day afterwards - you'll be fine.

I'm fairly convinced that the #1 reason people want meds for colonoscopies isn't for pain, so much as to overcome the mental discomfort of having something shoved up your bare arse...

 

[weepiper]

So looks like I've got this to look forwards to.

Apparently I get the choice between gas or injected sedative (or nothing). Which one do you think is going to make the whole thing more bearable?

Those who've had it, how did you feel the next day? OK to work?

I did it with just gas and air and tbh it was pretty painful, wouldn't recommend. I felt basically fine the next day, you do feel a bit discombobulated for a day or two because someone has had a good rummage around in your insides after all but it was nothing I couldn't distract myself from with activity.

 

[The39thStep]

So looks like I've got this to look forwards to.

Apparently I get the choice between gas or injected sedative (or nothing). Which one do you think is going to make the whole thing more bearable?

Those who've had it, how did you feel the next day? OK to work?

Go for the sedative. I got knocked out for mine , I was in and out of the clinic in 45 mins so I guess I was out for 30 mins? No discomfort afterwards in fact I went for a few beers about three hours later.

 

[bellaozzydog]

So looks like I've got this to look forwards to.

Apparently I get the choice between gas or injected sedative (or nothing). Which one do you think is going to make the whole thing more bearable?

Those who've had it, how did you feel the next day? OK to work?

Take all the iv drugs

It’s fun fighting it trying to chat and watching your own pink innards inflated then you pretty much spark out

 

[Karl Masks]

It's n ot too bad until the camera has to turn. Then you feel it, like bad gas. Then you can huff that painkiller gas until your head spins

 

[gentlegreen]

I'm guessing we're talking about a sigmoidoscopy rather than the whole 9 yards ? (or rather 1.5 metres).
Blimey I see they've phased out the automatic one at 55 ...

 

[UnderOpenSky]

Thanks everyone. IV sedation it is then.

 

[UnderOpenSky]

I'm guessing we're talking about a sigmoidoscopy rather than the whole 9 yards ? (or rather 1.5 metres).
Blimey I see they've phased out the automatic one at 55 ...

I've really no idea.

 

[editor]

So looks like I've got this to look forwards to.

Apparently I get the choice between gas or injected sedative (or nothing). Which one do you think is going to make the whole thing more bearable?

Those who've had it, how did you feel the next day? OK to work?

Go for the sedative although it went a bit wrong for me, The nurse took several very painful attempts to find the vein in my hand and then seemed to give me way too much as moments later I collapsed and had no idea if I was standing up or sitting down. Not a bad buzz if that's what you were in the mood for, but not so good when you're making a scene in a hospital corridor!

 

[maomao]

Take all the drugs and ask for more. If you scream when it goes in they give you pethadine.

 

[hash tag]

I knew there was another thread somewhere. I did not do drugs as I wanted out of hospital and normality asap. My colonoscopy took 2.5 hours. It was fine.

I finally had my colonoscopy today. It took over two hours because two polyps were removed. One polyps was capped because of bleeding, the other looked like an alien and was less of an issue.
No drugs were involved. Watching most of it on the screen was fascinating and I spent a bit of time laughing and joking and chatting to staff while it was all happening. It felt like I had a stomach cramp once or twice but wasn't nearly as painful or uncomfortable as I had been led to believe.
I had 5 maybe 6 staff working on me the whole time, they were all lovely and amazing.

 

[RoyReed]

I've really no idea.

Find out. If it's a full colonoscopy you'll want the intravenous sedation. If it's a sigmoidoscopy (just goes up to the top on your left-hand side) then gas'n'air should be enough. If you have intravenous sedation you're meant to have someone accompany you who can see you home, and IIRC, be with you for the next 24 hours.

 

[hash tag]

Find out. If it's a full colonoscopy you'll want the intravenous sedation. If it's a sigmoidoscopy (just goes up to the top on your left-hand side) then gas'n'air should be enough. If you have intravenous sedation you're meant to have someone accompany you who can see you home, and IIRC, be with you for the next 24 hours.

But why. See above....mine took 2.5 hours as well! There was a little discomfort when they were trying to snip the polyps but I walked out immediately it was over and went straight for something to eat. Recovery time was nil.