An American's observations about his visit to England go viral

[Chick Webb]

they're lush with butter, jam and clotted cream on. or just butter tbf

I knew you were a wrongun. What are they? Cake or bread? They are a shit example of either.

 

[danny la rouge]

Duel, eh? Forks at dawn!

I *fucking* hate this phone! Honestly, I could spell before I got it, now I'm posting all sorts of crap. I had a car breaking rather than braking yesterday!

 

[Orang Utan]

I knew you were a wrongun. What are they? Cake or bread? They are a shit example of either.

do they have to be one or the other? i love their clagginess. i can see why that not appeal to some.

 

[Chick Webb]

That seems a bit gratuitous.

I like scones, but as you attest, their existence is not in question. Saveloys on the other hand probably don't exist.

I'm giving out about scones, not as a contested thing that may not exist, but as an example of what's wrong with this country, in line with the theme of the thread. I've already admitted that they are equally popular in Ireland!

 

[danny la rouge]

French Germans.

Alsatians?

I wonder what kind of mustard they like?

 

[fishfinger]

ah, you're one of those types who has to have a little of each food crammed on their fork. you know it would be easier if you turned it over and scooped it all up instead?

I like to vary it a bit - sometimes only one foodstuff on the fork, sometimes more than one.

 

[Chick Webb]

do they have to be one or the other? i love their clagginess. i can see why that not appeal to some.

Ugh, your wrongness knows no bounds. Although I saw a recipe for lemon cream scones the other day that looked nice. I like an auld pain au raisin, me.

 

[danny la rouge]

I'm giving out about scones, not as a contested thing that may not exist, but as an example of what's wrong with this country, in line with the theme of the thread. I've already admitted that they are equally popular in Ireland!

Ah, ok.

But scones are great. What else can you bake in 12 minutes if you have sudden guests but nothing in the house to give them with tea?

 

[danny la rouge]

i'm afraid they're all over england

Scones or saveloys?

 

[Chick Webb]

Ah, ok.

But scones are great. What else can you bake in 12 minutes if you have sudden guests but nothing in the house to give them with tea?

I give me guests fuck all when they show up bar tea. That's a nice idea though. Maybe i should give them something.

 

[Chick Webb]

You can't make pain au raisins in 12 mins, that's for sure.

 

[danny la rouge]

I give me guests fuck all when they show up bar tea. That's a nice idea though. Maybe i should give them something.

Of course you give guests something!

 

[danny la rouge]

You can't make pain au raisins in 12 mins, that's for sure.

Not without Paul Hollywood frowning at you anyway.

 

[Celyn]

I *fucking* hate this phone! Honestly, I could spell before I got it, now I'm posting all sorts of crap. I had a car breaking rather than braking yesterday!

I love nitpicking at typos to make people shout at their clever phones.

 

[Chick Webb]

Of course you give guests something!

Give, yes, but bake? What kind of Stepford wife are you, Danny?

 

[Chick Webb]

Ooh, guests! I better get on some scones! They only take 12 minutes.

 

[danny la rouge]

I love nitpicking at typos to make people shout at their clever phones.

Sometimes it consults me before changing something, but other times it just goes ahead and changes it; those are the ones I tend not to notice before clicking "reply".

 

[Celyn]

And if they are guests that you don't like, scones can also be weapons, like the Discworld Scone of Stone.

 

[danny la rouge]

Give, yes, but bake? What kind of Stepford wife are you, Danny?

Clearly one who doesn't have any penguins left in the biscuit tin.

 

[Orang Utan]

Scones or saveloys?

Saveloys

 

[Chick Webb]

And if they are guests that you don't like, scones can also be weapons, like the Discworld Scone of Stone.

Do you serve it, or chuck it? I've only read 4 of the Discworld books.

 

[danny la rouge]

Saveloys

Chin doesn't think so.

 

[Chick Webb]

WHAT THE FLIP IS A SAVELOY?

 

[Orang Utan]

Chin doesn't think so.

Who?

 

[danny la rouge]

Who?

That's a piece of youth speak you taught me the other day!

 

[Orang Utan]

WHAT THE FLIP IS A SAVELOY?

A sausage that has a weird rubbery skin. And you fucking BOIL it.

 

[danny la rouge]

WHAT THE FLIP IS A SAVELOY?

A mythical luminous red sausage the people of England tell gullible tourists exist.

 

[fishfinger]

WHAT THE FLIP IS A SAVELOY?

Oi, oi, saveloy



The things under it are called chips.

 

[Chick Webb]

A mythical luminous red sausage the people of England tell gullible tourists exist.

We have luminous pink pig meat called brawn. Do you have that here?

 

[danny la rouge]

Chips I've seen.