I'm sitting staring at my computer screen, very bored. Last week my company of the last 18 months started the process to make me redundant. This is a firm I took a pay cut to join thinking it was an opportunity to join a partnership. I lost a fortune in forfeiting shares in the old place.
This is a couple of weeks after a great and expensive holiday so savings are at a low ebb, and the credit card bills are due.
I'm having problems concentrating. It's very depressing, on the scrap heap at 50....looks like my first break in employment since aged 18 is on the cards. I'm not sleeping, having panic attacks.
Hopefully something will come up. I'm in a very specialist field (ship surveys and salvage work) and I know a lot of companies are quiet at the moment, however I had an encouraging chat with a former colleague who works for a competitor yesterday. I'm meeting a friend tonight who might have some freelance work for me, and I've sent my CV to another competitor who are advertising.
I shouldn't really be feeling this depressed. I know I'm being irrational.