How do you classify restaurants? (a cynic's review)

[dilute micro]

Today I went to a trendy-quaint sandwich shop....and got pissed off.

1. Sandwich restaurants - that DON'T HAVE KETCHUP ON THE TABLE. (you have to ask for it but tabasco sauce, mustard, and horseradish pepper sauce are on the table )

2. tv-dinner restaurants - this is where you basically get frozen preprepared food heated up for you.

3. Ambiance restaurants - lots of attention creating an (usually fake) atmosphere, antiques on the wall, reprinted advertisements from generations past... and crappy food.

4. Made restaurants - "made" as in the mafia, where poor service doesn't deter the faithful crowds. These are well established.

5. Lost - upstarts that haven't yet found their niche.

6. Johnny Come Lately - gone in 20 years - just here for the buck with all the latest duds - often corporate.

7. Staples - chinese, mexican, burger joints, pizza joints... nothing innovative. Inflexible. Just the sos. These will live or die without changing.

8. Corporation restaurants - big business restaurants that have employed a team of psyche experts to learn what it is that will make you go there and spend your money. These will usually include one or more of the above restaurant types.

9. Fast Food - fast food. See corporation restaurants, See Johnny Come Lately restaurants, See Lost restaurants. See made restaurants.



add to this please if I've missed a creature.

 

[Santino]

Cheer up.

 

[Johnny Canuck3]

Today I went to a trendy-quaint sandwich shop....and got pissed off.

1. Sandwich restaurants - that DON'T HAVE KETCHUP ON THE TABLE. (you have to ask for it but tabasco sauce, mustard, and horseradish pepper sauce are on the table ).

Worst part must be when they make you turn your Ford hat frontways, get a t shirt on, and put in your false teeth before they'll let you through the front door.

 

[Clair De Lune]

I think you should eat in tbh.

 

[Dr. Furface]

1. Sandwich restaurants - that DON'T HAVE KETCHUP ON THE TABLE. (you have to ask for it but tabasco sauce, mustard, and horseradish pepper sauce are on the table )

Where is it? - sounds like my kinda joint!

 

[Maurice Picarda]

US centric c/p and a shit one at that.

 

[moose]

I'm too busy eating to give it that much thought, tbh.

 

[dilute micro]

US centric c/p and a shit one at that.

Of course its going to be US centric you stupid fuck. That's where I eat at restaurants. That doesn't mean the thread is exclusively American.

 

[Maurice Picarda]

Of course its going to be US centric you stupid fuck. That's where I eat at restaurants. That doesn't mean the thread is exclusively American.

Sorry, I didn't realise you were a Sepp. That's why I assumed it was a c/p.

 

[Johnny Canuck3]

Sorry, I didn't realise you were a Sepp. That's why I assumed it was a c/p.

It's an error to automatically assume that everyone is British.

 

[Yuwipi Woman]

You know its a classy restaurant when they put a bottle of ketsup on the table.

 

[Santino]

It's an error to automatically assume that everyone is British.

I assume everyone is not only British, but from London and about the same age as me. It's up to them to correct me.

 

[strung out]

ketchup in a sandwich? unless it's a fishfinger sandwich, completely wrong imo.

 

[Yelkcub]

ketchup in a sandwich? unless it's a fishfinger sandwich, completely wrong imo.

And still wrong then Stringy!

 

[strung out]

And still wrong then Stringy!

i'd go for horseradish or hp sauce in a fishfinger sandwich personally, but i ain't going to hate on ketchup lovers in this instance.

 

[Yelkcub]

i'd go for horseradish or hp sauce in a fishfinger sandwich personally, but i ain't going to hate on ketchup lovers in this instance.

Noooo! Vinegar and black pepper is all you need.

 

[Orang Utan]

2*: doesn't give me the runs
1*: does

 

[geminisnake]

You seem to have missed good food, decent service and reasonable priced places in your list. Do you not get them where you live?

 

[strung out]

i hate those restaurants that don't sell good food

 

[Santino]

Good food is in my top 10 things to look for in a restaurant. Well, top 20 easy.

 

[Yuwipi Woman]

You seem to have missed good food, decent service and reasonable priced places in your list. Do you not get them where you live?

He lives in Missouri (pronounced "misery"). I think what passes for a restaurant there is Waffle House (pronounced "awful house").