Films ruined by child characters

[Maltin]

Fatherhood was single handedly ruined by macauly culkins pageboy haircut, which even managed to out-cunt ted dansons appaling pony tail

What is this film? The only film called Father Hood on IMDB features Patrick Swayze and Halle Berry and Brian Bonsall.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0106877/?ref_=sr_1

Can't find easily a film staring Danson or Culkin either.

 

[Maltin]

I give you the kid from T2 though, Edward Furlong couldn't act for toffee and was lumbered with some awful dialogue.

But he doesn't ruin the film in my opinion though.

 

[Maltin]

As for Edward Furlong, things have not been peachy for most of his adult life, it seems. He's just been banged up for six months as well. Then again after that performance in T2, I guess there weren't many film scripts landing on his doormat...

I don't think T2 was an issue. I think he was lined up for T3 but due to various problems he had/was causing they decided to go with Nick Stahl instead.

 

[Reno]

But he doesn't ruin the film in my opinion though.

True, I wouldn't go that far.

I don't think T2 was an issue. I think he was lined up for T3 but due to various problems he had/was causing they decided to go with Nick Stahl instead.

He was never considered. Apart from his substance abuse issues he was passed over because he wasn't considered a lead actor who can carry a film.

 

[Fez909]

War of the Worlds (Tom Cruise version).

Saw it the other day for the first time. It was better than I expected because I had such low expectations of it, but fuck me, that kid's annoying. Not sure if the son counts as a "child actor" too, but while his performance wasn't awful, the pointlessness of him being in the story definitely contributed to the shitness of the film.

 

[DexterTCN]

 

[Reno]

War of the Worlds (Tom Cruise version).

Saw it the other day for the first time. It was better than I expected because I had such low expectations of it, but fuck me, that kid's annoying. Not sure if the son counts as a "child actor" too, but while his performance wasn't awful, the pointlessness of him being in the story definitely contributed to the shitness of the film.

Dakota Fanning was excellent and acted exactly how an 8 year old girl would act when the world goes to shit around her: terrified. It made the horror of the situation real.

 

[Reno]

Are you sure you're on the right thread ?

 

[DexterTCN]

Are you sure you're on the right thread ?

I know, sorry. I just didn't want to run in and put the boot into one of the many children who have annoyed me in films.

That pic would be ruined with a kid. Apart from Hit Girl or Matilda from Leon....probably.

 

[Fez909]

Dakota Fanning was excellent and acted exactly how an 8 year old girl would act when the world goes to shit around her: terrified. It made the horror of the situation real.

She was irrelevant to the story, though. She wasn't in the original book and there was no need to write her into the new story. I suppose the original story was a bit too nuanced for a big budget blockbuster, so they needed her and her brother to do loads of pointless and stupid shit that gets them in danger so super Tom can come rescue them after some mild tension.

Could've done without either of them, IMO.

 

[Maltin]

He was never considered. Apart from his substance abuse issues he was passed over because he wasn't considered a lead actor who can carry a film.

Whilst not necessarily a sign of the truth, it is reported as such on Wikipedia and IMDB and in this contemporaneous report.

http://culture.com/news/item/5587/furlongs-contract-terminated.phtml

 

[Reno]

She was irrelevant to the story, though. She wasn't in the original book and there was no need to write her into the new story. I suppose the original story was a bit too nuanced for a big budget blockbuster, so they needed her and her brother to do loads of pointless and stupid shit that gets them in danger so super Tom can come rescue them after some mild tension.

Could've done without either of them, IMO.

Her function is exactly what I pointed out, to bring home the terror of the situation, to make it real. To watch people being terrified is what sells a dangerous situation, unless you make a film all about badasses who are being cool and kick alien ass. Who in their right mind cares about what happens to that dumb lunk Cruise, so they gave him characters to be responsible for. I found Tim Robbins awful performance far more irritating than the kids.

I think that whole hatred of child characters in films has more to do with some men's lack of empathy for fictional characters. Sure, there have been irritating or inept child actors, but I never understand this hatred of children who when placed in peril, for behaving like children would and finding them irritating.

 

[Reno]

Whilst not necessarily a sign of the truth, it is reported as such on Wikipedia and IMDB and in this contemporaneous report.

http://culture.com/news/item/5587/furlongs-contract-terminated.phtml

Oh blimey and he is standing next to Natasha Lyonne in that photo, who is even more of a drug addled celebrity disaster zone than he is.

 

[DarthSydodyas]

the day the earth stood still, the remake with keanu. moderately shit film ruined by that i'm-here-cos-of-daddy shit for brains.

 

[ymu]

How daaaaare you

Kate Capshaw was the problem in that film. Shoulda been a buddy flick, but nooooooo, we've got to have smooching for the giiiiirls. Bleurgh.

I didn't really like Karen Allen either, to be honest. Again though, hers is but one in a film full of sins.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that girls just get in the way of adventure.

Insecure in your masculinity much?

Revealing as it is, cut out the misogynistic shit, yeah?

 

[Fez909]

Her function is exactly what I pointed out, to bring home the terror of the situation, to make it real. To watch people being terrified is what sells a dangerous situation, unless you make a film all about badasses who are being cool and kick alien ass. Who in their right mind cares about what happens to that dumb lunk Cruise, so they gave him characters to be responsible for. I found Tim Robbins awful performance far more irritating than the kids.

I think that whole hatred of child characters in films has more to do with some men's lack of empathy for fictional characters. Sure, there have been irritating or inept child actors, but I never understand this hatred of children who when placed in peril, for behaving like children would and finding them irritating.

I don't hate child characters in films. I like the kids in Jurrassic Park and hadn't even considered them ruining the film until reading this thread. Ditto T2.

I'll certainly admit to lacking empathy for some fictional characters, but their sex or age doesn't come into it for me.

I've just found this which sums up how I felt about her, but not with the same zeal as this guy

Hateful, hateful hateful child. Her high pitched girl-screaming cuts through your brain like an an anglegrinder through sheet metal - which would have been soothing mood music by comparison. This alone would be reason enough to have us cheering with glee if she had been slain by aliens.
Even in her quieter moments though, she adds nothing to the soul of a film already bereft of sympathetic characters. Her performance stinks with the ordure of teams of people molding her into being the cutest-little-princess-the-audience-ever-has-seen, but this effort backfires with a vengeance - we truly believe entire auditoriums were sitting watching the screen, willing her to die.
This obviously never happens though, and she spends the whole film revelling in her role as a two-dimensional living prop that needs constant rescuing.

I suspect I've just confirmed my lack of empathy for child actors to you though.

And yes, Tim Robbins character was infuriating. The film was just shite, tbh. Decent aliens, though. Was impressed by them!

 

[IC3D]

The kids in Bugsy Malone ruined a potentially classic gangster flick.

 

[sunnysidedown]

Near Dark

 

[Reno]

I don't hate child characters in films. I like the kids in Jurrassic Park and hadn't even considered them ruining the film until reading this thread. Ditto T2.

I'll certainly admit to lacking empathy for some fictional characters, but their sex or age doesn't come into it for me.

I've just found this which sums up how I felt about her, but not with the same zeal as this guy


I suspect I've just confirmed my lack of empathy for child actors to you though.

And yes, Tim Robbins character was infuriating. The film was just shite, tbh. Decent aliens, though. Was impressed by them!

As to your quote, it's one thing to dislike Dakota Fanning's characters, but to dismiss her acting in such hateful terms is typical forum hyperbole, where someone has zero grip on their critical faculty and think speaking in extremes somehow gives their argument weight. She was quite rightly considered the best child actor of her time.

I think War of the Worlds is fantastic till they get stuck in the basement with Tim Robbins. I thought the sub-E.T. aliens were pretty lame myself when they finally reveal themselves.

 

[Fez909]

As to your quote, it's one thing to dislike Dakota Fanning's characters, but to dismiss her acting in such hateful terms is typical forum hyperbole, where someone has zero grip on their critical faculty and think speaking in extremes somehow gives their argument weight. She was quite rightly considered the best child actor of her time.

I think War of the Worlds is fantastic till they get stuck in the basement with Tim Robbins. I thought the sub-E.T. aliens were pretty lame myself when they finally reveal themselves.

Fantastic? Like the bit where the crowd set upon their car, zombie-like, coming through the windscreen and even tearing open the glass with their bare hands just to get inside? Or the bit where the daughter runs as far away as it's possible to get to go for a piss despite her dad telling her not to go far, and seeing how dangerous the world has just become? Or the bit where the son decides to stand in the middle of a battlefield with the army and their heavy weapons being destroyed by giant, seemingly indestructible alien machines, even refusing to leave when the army, in their tanks and helicopters, are retreating?

And this was all before the basement scenes.

 

[Balham]

chitty chitty bang bang

But there was hope in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

 

[Citizen66]

I think we should include a synopsis of the plot with those characters removed.

Home Alone: The tal of a group of clumsy burglars who nonetheless succeed in burgling a large house and then argue during the celebratory feast.

Terminator 2: A love story of two androids out of their time.

Jurassic Park: 'Caution, scenes of strong sexual violence'

etc.

Bugsy Malone - A tour around pinewood studios.

 

[Reno]

Fantastic? Like the bit where the crowd set upon their car, zombie-like, coming through the windscreen and even tearing open the glass with their bare hands just to get inside? Or the bit where the daughter runs as far away as it's possible to get to go for a piss despite her dad telling her not to go far, and seeing how dangerous the world has just become? Or the bit where the son decides to stand in the middle of a battlefield with the army and their heavy weapons being destroyed by giant, seemingly indestructible alien machines, even refusing to leave when the army, in their tanks and helicopters, are retreating?

And this was all before the basement scenes.

I've written about this plenty of times already, but I'm not always bothered if things are 100% plausible in a real life scenario. I don't judge films by how they conform to real life situations, they are fictions which have to get from point A to B within a certain time and for that they take dramatic licence. I thought the film was exciting till they got to the basement and that's what I wanted from it.

 

[Fez909]

I've written about this plenty of times already, but I'm not always bothered if things are 100% plausible in a real life scenario. I don't judge films by how they conform to real life situations, they are fictions which have to get from point A to B within a certain time and for that they take dramatic licence. I thought the film was exciting till they got to the basement and that's what I wanted from it.

But one of the things you took exception to earlier in the thread was my complaining about the girl being annoying, who you claimed was "acting exactly as an 8 year old would" in that situation.

So, when annoying screaming girls gets added to the story: good, added realism, empathy
When same added children do lots of stupid infuriating things in order to create excitement: good, realism not important, dramatic license.

OK.

 

[ymu]

Suspension of disbelief matters, surely Reno?

If it's really badly unbelievable, I'm usually too annoyed by the stupidity of it to enjoy the rest.

 

[Reno]

But one of the things you took exception to earlier in the thread was my complaining about the girl being annoying, who you claimed was "acting exactly as an 8 year old would" in that situation.

So, when annoying screaming girls gets added to the story: good, added realism, empathy
When same added children do lots of stupid infuriating things in order to create excitement: good, realism not important, dramatic license.

OK.

OMG, you are proving me wrong THE EVIDENCE IS MOUNTING !

I'm generally more interested in believable character beats than in plot plausibility and as I said, the girl's terror sold the danger of the situation to me as much as the effects, so sue me. We can go in circles about this now...:winkywink:

 

[Reno]

Suspension of disbelief matters, surely Reno?

If it's really badly unbelievable, I'm usually too annoyed by the stupidity of it to enjoy the rest.

Yes, I suspended my disbelief. It's something you have to do for any fantastic fiction.

 

[ymu]

Yes, I suspended my disbelief. It's something you have to do for any fantastic fiction.

I can handle fantastic fiction. I'm very good at suspending disbelief, to the point where I cannot watch horror at all. It's when characters act in ways that make no sense given who they are and the situation they are in, especially when there were valid options that do make sense, that a film is ruined for me.

 

[Fez909]

OMG, you are proving me wrong THE EVIDENCE IS MOUNTING !

I'm generally more interested in believable character beats than in plot plausibility and as I said, the girl's terror sold the danger of the situation to me as much as the effects, so sue me. We can go in circles about this now...:winkywink:

I didn't meant it to be an argument over who is right and who is wrong There's clearly no right answer.

And we obviously look for different things from films, so yep, might as well agree to disagree.

 

[Reno]

I can handle fantastic fiction. I'm very good at suspending disbelief, to the point where I cannot watch horror at all. It's when characters act in ways that make no sense given who they are and the situation they are in, especially when there were valid options that do make sense, that a film is ruined for me.

In the end what matters to me was that WotW was a thrilling ride (up to a point) because Spielberg knows how to do this kind of thing unlike almost anyone else. The characters acted no more stupidly than those in most blockbusters, to me they feel slightly more real because Spielberg generally doesn't resort to badass heroics and gives his blockbusters a human dimension which makes the action relatable. And the girl was the character which made that happen.

Now if you want to pick the film apart because some things were implausible to move the plot along, fine, but for me it wasn't bad enough not to get caught up in it. Till they get to Tim Robbins' basement is still think WotW is one of the best modern films of its kind. Then it nosedives, but for me that's more down to pacing problems than to plausibility.