Coronavirus meme/panic/fear mongering general thread

[Badgers]

British professor Neil Ferguson, who was in 10 Downing Street this week after convincing the Prime Minister to stiffen his response to the Coronavirus Outbreak has self-isolated after developing a persistent dry cough and a fever

 

[2hats]

 

[Badgers]

Snotty snoughts in the trough eh?

Hopefully the Tories have stopped sharing roll up £50 notes and have isolated Gove's private bathroom.

 

[bellaozzydog]

The best Corvus-19 thread

 

[The39thStep]

Just had an email about my pet insurance in the U.K.

‘Good afternoon,​

We appreciate you might be worried about the impact the coronavirus may have on your insurance with us. Please be assured that Debenhams Pet Insuranceis closely monitoring the situation and doing all that we can to provide the services you require at this time. In order to help us deliver the best possible service, we ask that you only call if absolutely necessary. For example; if you have a concern regarding your renewal or you wish to cancel your policy.’ I wasn’t aware dogs could get the virus ? ​

 

[treelover]

 

[The39thStep]

He disappeared after a particularly messy episode of Heartbeat I think

Always possessed a large moustache and filmed in a sheepskin standing in front of some trees and the odd animal

 

[Teaboy]

London rumour mill is really whirring. Talk of full City shut down from tomorrow. All bars, cafes and restaurants to be forced to shut as no one was taking any notice of Johnson's advice. This is the problem when virtually everything you say is an obvious lie, people ignore you even when you're trying to be honest.

I'm sure its nothing to do with Westminster area and all the old moneyed types there.

 

[Teaboy]

Just had an email about my pet insurance in the U.K.

‘Good afternoon,​

We appreciate you might be worried about the impact the coronavirus may have on your insurance with us. Please be assured that Debenhams Pet Insuranceis closely monitoring the situation and doing all that we can to provide the services you require at this time. In order to help us deliver the best possible service, we ask that you only call if absolutely necessary. For example; if you have a concern regarding your renewal or you wish to cancel your policy.’ I wasn’t aware dogs could get the virus ? ​

I think the virus can survive on their fur but won't affect them. Probably just people jamming the phones line trying to find out whether their mutt will be covered if it gets the virus.

 

[editor]

Wrestling without an audience is like weird theatre

 

[mx wcfc]

London rumour mill is really whirring. Talk of full City shut down from tomorrow. All bars, cafes and restaurants to be forced to shut as no one was taking any notice of Johnson's advice. This is the problem when virtually everything you say is an obvious lie, people ignore you even when you're trying to be honest.

I'm sure its nothing to do with Westminster area and all the old moneyed types there.

I'm off out to the pub as soon as I can turn off the work laptop. It feels like any day now could be my last proper cask conditioned ale in a pub for months.

 

[Teaboy]

I'm off out to the pub as soon as I can turn off the work laptop. It feels like any day now could be my last proper cask conditioned ale in a pub for months.

Oh. I fear that statement will get you proper internet shamed here. 10, 9, 8, 7...

 

[belboid]

I'm off out to the pub as soon as I can turn off the work laptop. It feels like any day now could be my last proper cask conditioned ale in a pub for months.

I was wondering about ordering a barrel from the brewery. I'll be asking when we go to the pub quiz later tonight

 

[cupid_stunt]

Wrestling without an audience is like weird theatre

TBF wrestling with an audience is like weird theatre.

 

[ruffneck23]

Wrestling without an audience is like weird theatre

very weird

 

[cupid_stunt]

I'm off out to the pub as soon as I can turn off the work laptop. It feels like any day now could be my last proper cask conditioned ale in a pub for months.

I was wondering about ordering a barrel from the brewery. I'll be asking when we go to the pub quiz later tonight

Urbs on a mission to catch & spread coronavirus.

 

[FridgeMagnet]

 

[little_legs]

 

[Doctor Carrot]

 

[belboid]

Urbs on a mission to catch & spread coronavirus.

there'll be four or five tables of people in different corners of the pub. our table would all be seeing each other anyway (and will all be symptomless, as i trust the others will be). The whole place will be less crowded than the supermarket I just pointlessly walked around, or the workplace mrsb has spent all day in. and the pub will need some trade if it isn't to be completely fucked.

 

[petee]

 

[little_legs]

 

[mx wcfc]

I was wondering about ordering a barrel from the brewery. I'll be asking when we go to the pub quiz later tonight

Lots of local breweries have started free deliveries of bottled beers. I took delivery of a mixed case this morning. I expect your local brewery will be very happy to deliver a barrel to you!

 

[brogdale]

BBC R5 saying that THERE IS NO LOCKDOWN OF LONDON IMMINENT!!

Can't be long, then.

 

[The39thStep]

Local bar social distancing in action

 

[sojourner]

Two people in work have shown me photos on their phone of soldiers and army trucks supposedly on the M62 by us today. When asked the source of the photos, both said 'a friend'. What questioned further, they had no fucking idea of the actual source, but claimed that the military will be imposing a lockdown on us tomorrow

 

[belboid]

Local bar social distancing in action

didn't know you'd grown a beard!

 

[Teaboy]

Two people in work have shown me photos on their phone of soldiers and army trucks supposedly on the M62 by us today. When asked the source of the photos, both said 'a friend'. What questioned further, they had no fucking idea of the actual source, but claimed that the military will be imposing a lockdown on us tomorrow

This rumour is going round London as well.

 

[sojourner]

Just had someone else say it too - said her brother had actually seen them.

 

[Pickman's model]

Two people in work have shown me photos on their phone of soldiers and army trucks supposedly on the M62 by us today. When asked the source of the photos, both said 'a friend'. What questioned further, they had no fucking idea of the actual source, but claimed that the military will be imposing a lockdown on us tomorrow

it's obvs a coup attempt