tim
EXPLODED TIM! (Help me!!!)
There's plenty of ice at the antarctic so we should send all the polar bears there; as a bonus, if they feel a little p-peckish, they can p-p-pick up a penguin.
The office 'scolding email' thread
- Thread starter Badgers
- Start date
8ball
Decolonise colons!
Bet they leave the lights on when they’re not in the room too. I’d put up some pics of Greta Thunberg glaring near all the light switches. Nights are drawing in…
Boris Sprinkler
Dont be scared
To be fair if those dickhead bears weren’t having winter with no light and no warm, we wouldn’t need central heating and leccy. Fix that one scientists
petee
no gods, no malarkey
i found the picture - you're not kidding!
Pickman's model
Starry Wisdom
e2a: this is a liquid nitrogen device - hence 'LN'
oh: and attached photo
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equationgirl
Respect my existence or expect my resistance
Pickman's model for fucks sake some clever people are really not very smart. What a twat whoever did this - how did they manage to snap it off??
My money is on someone who shouldn't have been using it in the first place.
My money is on someone who shouldn't have been using it in the first place.
Spymaster
Plastic Paddy
I've just learnt what a dewar is.
existentialist
Tired and unemotional
I was confused by the lowercase 'd'. I knew what a Dewar flask is, but it appears that, just like my favourite operating system, I'm case-sensitive
Spymaster
Plastic Paddy
I was confused by the lowercase 'd'. I knew what a Dewar flask is, but it appears that, just like my favourite operating system, I'm case-sensitive
If he'd used a capital 'D' I'd have thought it was something to do with whisky.
billy_bob
Air of bewilderment model's own
Someone's just begging to have their 'milk' tampered with...
Pickman's model
Starry Wisdom
Hi all,
In the unlikely event any of you were planning to, please do not enter the SEM room in the basement (B20). The microscope is currently disassembled, but still live, and there is an electric shock hazard for anyone touching parts of the microscope. The door will be locked until the microscope is back together again. Also, please excuse the things in the corridor, we had to clear the room for the engineers.
Best,
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Pickman's model
Starry Wisdom
Hi all,
Use of kettle in kitchen
[XXXXX] has purchased us a new kettle which is now in the kitchen*.
A reminder that this kettle should only be used to boil water, not to cook anything or heat anything else in it, e.g. milk, food, etc.
On two separate occasions now, non-water items have been found in the kettle and others have had to clean it out first. If you need to heat anything, please use the microwave.
All the best
to which the head of department has replied:
Hi all
Have to say that I am still quite astounded at this. This is a significant health and safety risk on a number of levels – fire, allergies etc.
Please let’s make sure this does not happen again. We do not want to get to a point where we cannot have a kettle available for use.
All the very best,
Use of kettle in kitchen
[XXXXX] has purchased us a new kettle which is now in the kitchen*.
A reminder that this kettle should only be used to boil water, not to cook anything or heat anything else in it, e.g. milk, food, etc.
On two separate occasions now, non-water items have been found in the kettle and others have had to clean it out first. If you need to heat anything, please use the microwave.
All the best
to which the head of department has replied:
Hi all
Have to say that I am still quite astounded at this. This is a significant health and safety risk on a number of levels – fire, allergies etc.
Please let’s make sure this does not happen again. We do not want to get to a point where we cannot have a kettle available for use.
All the very best,
Spymaster
Plastic Paddy
I reckon the same fuckwit did it twice.
Surely you can't have 2 people that fucking stupid in the same company.
Pickman's model
Starry Wisdom
it's not a particularly large department, whoever's done this must have done some other peculiar things
equationgirl
Respect my existence or expect my resistance
Yes, yes you can, in my experience.
equationgirl
Respect my existence or expect my resistance
I love reading these emails. I am eagerly awaiting an update to the credit card saga...
Pickman's model
Starry Wisdom
my favourite was the poison cupboard key one
StoneRoad
heckling from the back!
Like equationgirl said,
Yes, you certainly can.
Not necessarily expressed as doing daft things with kettles ...
However, for several years before covid stopped my business stays in hotels, more than once I had to take kettles straight to reception because they had been used for purposes other than boiling water ...
Hard boiled eggs was the usual problem, but once it had been kippers boiled in the bag ...
Pickman's model
Starry Wisdom
that sort of thing boils my piss
bluescreen
tofu eating wokerati
My son's hall of residence had someone use a kettle for boiling soup. He doesn't know if was the same person who didn't realise you had to use water when cooking spaghetti.
Mumbles274
running from law and the press and the parents
Thats why you shouldn't use kettles in hotel rooms. You'll be boiling someone's pissthat sort of thing boils my piss
Spymaster
Plastic Paddy
To do this, the fuckwit would have to override the automatic cut-off by taping the switch down, or similar.
That's spectacularly dangerous
8ball
Decolonise colons!
To do this, the fuckwit would have to override the automatic cut-off by taping the switch down, or similar.
That's spectacularly dangerous
Poached eggs are much safer.
isvicthere?
a.k.a. floppybollocks
Just a thought, but... in other European countries, Spain and France for example, the kettle is virtually unknown. Water is boiled in a saucepan. Maybe the guests in these hotels were continentals thinking of the kettle as some kind of supercharged cooking pot?
equationgirl
Respect my existence or expect my resistance
I was thinking the same thing. We in the UK take kettles for granted but other countries don't use them. Seeing a kettle for the first time might be confusing for someone if they have no experience of using one.
StoneRoad
heckling from the back!
I've stayed in "a few hotels" in France, Netherlands & Poland, as well as many in the UK.
Kettle & coffee/tea kits were present in all but the cheaper pensions [chain businesses of el-cheapo rooms] - but, even from those you could get one from "reception" [ditto irons, hair dryer and extra bedding / towels] if you asked nicely & paid the deposit.
tim
EXPLODED TIM! (Help me!!!)
The Charge of the Benefit of the Doubt Brigade
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