Dullest Film Ever

[belboid]

'Paris,Texas'.

god, could anyone be so wrong!

that opening scene, harry walking through the desert, the valleys so perfectly replicated in the lins onhis face...all but perfect. the genius with which it contrasted all the means to communicate with the fact that no one could....

however,

It's got the slowest car chase ever comitted to film.

is a very top comment

 

[YojimboUK]

or:

"anyone who doesn't understand the true meaning of the word 'pathetic' is officially stupid."

From the Greek, innit?

 

[Major Tom]

Most dull films I've had to sit through have been while travelling:
Star Trek 5 --- on a plane & thankfully fell asleep
Meet Joe Black
Titanic
Pearl Harbour
Scarface

But I rented Howard the Duck - the production obviously ran out of money after making the duck costume which is why the whole film seems to consist of endless chase scenes across car parks and through wharehouses.

Independence Day - I resisted seeing this for years but recently saw it on tv. Biggest load of tedious shite I've seen in my life.

Godfather 3 - in the cinema, stayed hoping it would get better, but it got worse

 

[oryx]

Moulin Rouge - 2 hours that I will never be able to get back.

Oooh yes - couldn't agree more. Can't think of a film I've seen in the last 5 or so years that has been more overrated. What I could've done with those 2 hours - even cleaning the bog would have been more useful.....& probably more exciting.

(
okay, we went to see this 'cos Antelope fancies Nicole Kidman.....it was rough justice for me dragging him to "Bridget Jones' Diary" 'cos of Colin Firth...)

 

[Orang Utan]

Moulin Rouge is ace - what are you talking about it?
Admittedly on paper, it sounds dreadful.
When my flatmate got it out of the shop, my heart sank, but it turned out to be loads of fun and a spectacle to watch.

 

[Mrs Miggins]

The only good bit in Moulin Rouge is Jim Broadbent singing "Like a Virgin"

The rest is a steaming pile of horse manure

 

[T & P]

The English Patient must surely be a contester.

 

[big_c]

No no no you are all wrong.

The award for the worlds most boring film goes to: <drum roll>

Citizen Fucking Kane

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I only managed the first 10 minutes and it nearly killed me, did it get any better?

 

[Mrs Miggins]

No

 

[Orang Utan]

Citizen Kane is a masterpiece.
Barbarians the lot of you.

 

[Major Tom]

The English Patient must surely be a contester.

I never made it to the end.

And to that can I add The Piano?

 

[Choc]

shaun of the dead

citizen kane (i also didn't finish it)

the calender girls

 

[Major Tom]

shaun of the dead

No way - I watched it last week - twice - and would be willing to watch it again right now.

Great film

 

[kyser_soze]

Scarface

Say hello to my leetle fren'!!!

This is surely the most dull film in the English Language:

 

[Apocalypse21]

"The Village", which was the last film I saw at the pictures, was one of the most poorly scripted and drabbest films I have ever had the displeasure to sit through. The majority of it's 1 hr 30/2 hrs sees the characters in the same location talking endlessly about nothing. Without doubt the biggest Hollywood flop of 2004!

 

[pilchardman]

Oh, and Apocalypse Now. What a tedious drag that was.

 

[Choc]

captain corellis mandoline

seconded: moulin rouge -yaaawnnn!

 

[upsidedownwalrus]

And can I also mention Bladerunner? How many times have I fallen asleep during that borefest? Why anyone thinks it's good, I have no idea.

I understand the Hovis ad guy made it. Figures...

Yeah, I think Bladerunner is one of the most overrated films ever. Not actually bad, but definitely boring with no real story and basically quite pointless.

BUT a beautiful soundtrack though! (I've got hte CD somewhere)

 

[upsidedownwalrus]

well since i thought Vol 1 was a steaming pile of shite, i didn't even bother with 2..

Indeed. KB 1 was toss.

Personally I think all Tarantino's directed films are shit. Reservoir Dogs is annoying, dull 'trying to be shocking' crap, Pulp Fiction is pretentious wank, Jackie Brown is just boring.

On the other hand other things that he has been associated with but not entirely directed have been much better, like From Dusk Til Dawn (which I believe he part-directed) or True Romance (which he wrote)

 

[Random One]

League of Extraordinary Gentlemen and Daredevil, pile of shite both of them.

 

[girasol]

Solaris has to be the winner though.

I so, so wanted to watch Solaris (the original), and like it, but everytime time I've fallen asleep... I tried watching it twice... I never fell asleep when I read the book though.

(I didn't fall asleep on the remake, however, but I can't remember much of it...)

 

[jæd]

Lost In Translation. Two boring people being boring. Fuck knows what the critics watched but it wasn't this film...

 

[kyser_soze]

League of Extraordinary Gentlemen and Daredevil, pile of shite both of them.

Come on hun, you were setting yerself up for a fall here by going to see them in the first place.

I mean Ben 'Dullest man alive' Affleck as a blind superhero...

The only thing that saved that film was Jennifer Garner...

 

[Monkeygrinder's Organ]

I'll probably be burned as a heretic for suggesting this, but I've never even got close to being able to watch the whole of 2001 A Space Odyssey. I just find it completely numbing.

And I'd second (or third, or whatever) Moulin Rouge as well.

 

[swelegant]

Russian Ark. I tried so hard to like this film, but I came away only liking the idea of it, the photography and costumes. Some scenes just went on for too long, and learning about Russian history should have been a pre-requisite before seeing it.

I don't understand why there is so much fuss about Kill Bill. It's just a revenge movie that pays homage to anything that Tarantino has ever liked. Big deal

Apocalypse now. I'm an enormous fan of Heart of Darkness, and to see the book being completely mutilated was just too much

The BBC's version of Mansfield Park is pretty shit. The sound quality is really bad. You have to turn up the tv to maximum volume to be able to hear what they're saying. Considering that the BBC is normally excellent with these types of movies, it's really disappointing.

 

[Loki]

Citizen Kane is a masterpiece.
Barbarians the lot of you.

^ Agree! Many rate it as the best film ever made. I certainly enjoyed it.

 

[Juice Terry]

Tried to watch Spirit of the Beehive at the weekend but fell asleep after half an hour, its a bit hazy but I'm pretty sure absolutely fuck all happened.

Anybody know if its worth me giving it another try?

 

[YojimboUK]

Tried to watch Spirit of the Beehive at the weekend but fell asleep after half an hour, its a bit hazy but I'm pretty sure absolutely fuck all happened.

Anybody know if its worth me giving it another try?

Definitely worth another try, if you're in the mood for something slow and contemplative that doesn't answer all the questions it asks. One of my favourite films, hopeless arty twaddle-lover that I am.

 

[Juice Terry]

Definitely worth another try, if you're in the mood for something slow and contemplative that doesn't answer all the questions it asks. One of my favourite films, hopeless arty twaddle-lover that I am.

ok might do that when I'm more receptive, it was late, I was drunk, American Pie 47 would probably have been more appropriate for my mood

 

[nks487]

Stalker is the dullest film IMAO

Inspired by the thread on Charlotte Gray.
I fell asleep during Gangs Of New York, Gladiator and The English Patient.
Solaris has to be the winner though.

Try this one "Stalker" by Andrei Tarkovsky.. 163 mins long rated about 7.6 on
IMDB http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0079944/

I like independent cinema - own 1000s of DVDS of indies. Only ever turned
off a movie before the end in the case of Matrix 2, even that was a majority
decision!

20 min shot of guys crawling along over rocks was too much - I gave up and
turned Stalker off!

Yep.. he did do the screenplay for Solyaris (1972) the inspiration for Solaris (remake!).

P.S. I liked both Solyaris and Solaris!