Disastrous family seasonal attractions and the never to be forgotten Lapland New Forest Theme Park

[neonwilderness]

There haven't been as many photos coming from this one - I get the feeling it's not nearly as bad as previous efforts, and people are just doing it out of tradition.

Like Christmas mass.

I think you might be right, this review makes it sound half decent

http://www.tamingtwins.com/2014/11/22/the-magical-journey-review/

However I'm willing to overlook that to get into the Christmas spirit

 

[Lord Camomile]

However I'm willing to overlook that to get into the Christmas spirit

Good for you, we mustn't let things ruin our festive cheer!

Somehow I did manage to get duped by a pair of 2 and a half year olds into spending £10 on a pair of blow up penguins.

See, it's these kind of traditions that remind us all what this time of year - November - is all about

 

[JTG]

Are we desperately trying to reach the unattainable heights of six years ago? Or is this really the second coming of the anti-Christmas?

 

[Lord Camomile]

http://www.tamingtwins.com/2014/11/22/the-magical-journey-review/

Yeah, if you look at the photos in this review they're nowhere near the Poundland efforts of yesteryear.

(Big photos - click on them to see full size)

 

[DotCommunist]

at least this year we won't have the teeth grindingly villainous sight of peoples payed for bit by bit over the year hampers getting boyed off

 

[neonwilderness]

Yeah, if you look at the photos in this review they're nowhere near the Poundland efforts of yesteryear.
(Big photos - click on them to see full size)

yeah, it's certainly no Lapland New Forest

 

[Lord Camomile]

Now that's how you do Crapmass.

e2a: or Shitmass.

We're waiting to hear which branding tests better with focus groups.

 

[marty21]

please can we have photos of the smoking elves

 

[ElizabethofYork]

My favourite Winter Wonderland picture EVER ...

I've just been reading the original thread from 2008 and snorting with laughter!

 

[DaveCinzano]

please can we have photos of the smoking elves

They'll stunt their growth

 

[neonwilderness]

They'll stunt their growth

They need to so they can fit into their £10 Wilko suits

 

[DaveCinzano]

I want to know from which branch of Wilko's they've been buying their “£10 Santa suits” - Knightsbridge? Beverly Hills? Are they having them flown in from Dubai?

 

[skyscraper101]

I want to know from which branch of Wilko's they've been buying their “£10 Santa suits” - Knightsbridge? Beverly Hills? Are they having them flown in from Dubai?

Hand crafted by the finest elves in all of Lapland and delivered in advance each year by Santa himself in the pre-Yuletide warm up run, obviously.

 

[Lord Camomile]

yeah, it's certainly no Lapland New Forest

Can anyone prove that isn't what the Lapland car park looks like? Magic can only stretch so far and sometimes you just have to fall back on pragmatism. It can't all be red noses and bells on toeses.

 

[Giles]

Does anyone remember the story from a few years back where one disgruntled dad punched an elf in the face, thus demonstrating to his kids what Christmas is REALLY all about?

 

[neonwilderness]

Someone might as well do a realistic one next year

 

[ElizabethofYork]

Does anyone remember the story from a few years back where one disgruntled dad punched an elf in the face, thus demonstrating to his kids what Christmas is REALLY all about?

I preferred the one where a snowman was so fed up with the whole thing that he just sadly walked away .... still in his snowman costume.

 

[neonwilderness]

 

[DaveCinzano]

I preferred the one where a snowman was so fed up with the whole thing that he just sadly walked away .... still in his snowman costume.

Ironically that was actually the real Santa, in one of his pre-Xmas casual jobs.

 

[gentlegreen]

I'm trying to recall Xmas in the '60s as a small child.
I have a vague recollection of Fairfax House in Bristol (1950s department store that was knocked down in the '80s) having some sort of automata Xmas thing you paid a penny or something to peer into.

There weren't so many distractions back then - we didn't even have a TV.

 

[machine cat]

My favourite Winter Wonderland picture EVER ...

I've just been reading the original thread from 2008 and snorting with laughter!

I love that photo

 

[machine cat]

I struggle to believe anything with Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen's name against it could be so tacky.

 

[DotCommunist]

I've seen some of his less inspired changing rooms disasters, I can well believe it

 

[neonwilderness]

I'm trying to recall Xmas in the '60s as a small child.
I have a vague recollection of Fairfax House in Bristol (1950s department store that was knocked down in the '80s) having some sort of automata Xmas thing you paid a penny or something to peer into.

There weren't so many distractions back then - we didn't even have a TV.

You might have been amazed by a trip to Lapland New Forest back then. Lower expectations and all that.

 

[gentlegreen]

I struggle to believe anything with Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen's name against it could be so tacky.

At the end of the day, Xmas is tacky.

 

[spanglechick]

At the end of the day, Xmas is tacky.

yes. and so it should be. I find the idea of tasteful xmas stuff rather odd.

 

[gentlegreen]

I could never have been a parent.
I couldn't wait to escape Xmas - and birthdays come to that - and I've been happy to opt-out of all the other rites of passage too.

The "magic" of Xmas conditions children to accept lots of other dodgy stuff.
I get a shiver down my spine when I realise just how long it took me to shake off the last vestiges of any kind of respect for religion.

I'm all for eating, drinking and making merry here in the cold North, but you can keep the rest of it.

 

[DotCommunist]

^humbug

 

[gentlegreen]

^humbug

I've taken humbug to the next level.

 

[marty21]

If I went to one of these things and I saw an Elf smoking , or Santa smoking or a fucking reindeer smoking , I would take a picture as it is a touching Christmas image