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The office 'scolding email' thread

i have just had the most ridiculous note-based exchange with some bitch who works in the same building (not same company).

someone has been stealing my milk from the shared kitchen. not a couple of cups of tea worth, a couple of bowls of cereal worth. so i put a note on saying stop stealing this.

the bitch then put a note on saying 'only if you stop cutting your nails into the sink in the toilets' *

i didn't think it was that likely it was her stealing the milk, but i pretended to believe that and responded with 'and that concerns you HOW, thief?'

she then left practically an essay about my unhygenic ways.

i removed all the notes except for the first and look forward to encountering her in the communal areas!

my extreme rage has diminished enough that i am now planning to patronise her about how she should have spoken to me directly like a grown-up.


* this is indeed something i've done a few times due to the good lighting. i'm aware that some people might consider this unhygenic but my hands are clean and the sinks get cleaned every single day. also, i wash them down the sink, i'm not an animal.


I don't understand, why would you cut your nails at work anyway? Can't you wait till you get home?

I don't think it's particularly unhygienic but I think it's really weird to do it at work, unless there's something I'm missing.
 
I don't understand, why would you cut your nails at work anyway? Can't you wait till you get home?

I don't think it's particularly unhygienic but I think it's really weird to do it at work, unless there's something I'm missing.

i have netball straight from work on a monday and my nails have to be short. sometimes i don't get a chance at the weekend to do them.

and did i mention the great lighting?
 
i love how the focus is on the nail cutting and not on the fact that some random bitch thought the most appropriate way to compain about said cutting was to attach an anonymous scolding note to my milk in the communal kitchen. :cool:

i really don't see the nail thing as any different to any other personal grooming in the office. Loads of people do their makeup in the loos if they're going out straight from work. i do my nails sometimes if i'm netballing straight from work. should the make up people have worn a full face of slap all day just because it should be done at home? nope.
 
Don't you think it's interesting/illuminating how many other people, other than 'random bitch', think it's weird though?

Make up people will be wearing it all day anyway. Plus, they're not casting waste product from themselves into a communal area.

washing waste product down a sink would be more accurate. as i've said at least once, there's no trace for anyone else.

also, a couple of people have said it's fine and people are more likely to comment if they disagree with a thing.

tbh, i had never considered it before because i don't see a problem with it, but if someone had said something to me directly my reaction would have been to apologise and stop doing it, i'm not unreasonable.

my rage/bewilderment was not to the objection but to the method.
 
As nice as this email sounds the use of the word amnesty is an interesting choice.

Ladies and Gentleman,
There is going to be a Hi-Vis Vest Amnesty next week Monday 3rd April – 7th April 2017.

Please have a look in your cars and at home behind the sofa (you never know!).

If you find that you have accumulated a few, please bring them back to reception so I can replenish the vest wardrobe, as it is feeling lonely without them.


Please help to make a wardrobe happy again.


Many thanks for everyone’s co-operation.
 
i love how the focus is on the nail cutting and not on the fact that some random bitch thought the most appropriate way to compain about said cutting was to attach an anonymous scolding note to my milk in the communal kitchen. :cool:

i really don't see the nail thing as any different to any other personal grooming in the office. Loads of people do their makeup in the loos if they're going out straight from work. i do my nails sometimes if i'm netballing straight from work. should the make up people have worn a full face of slap all day just because it should be done at home? nope.

i'm intrigued how she managed to make the connection between your nails and milk. she must have been stalking you to see who the nail culprit was and then she came up with a devious scheme to get you back.
 
i'm intrigued how she managed to make the connection between your nails and milk. she must have been stalking you to see who the nail culprit was and then she came up with a devious scheme to get you back.

yeah it's very odd. she obviously knows who i am but i don't know for sure who she is. and she wasn't actually the milk thief, she just thought that was an appropriate way to raise a completely unrelated thing!

i'm fairly certain i know who it was, just because everyone apart from one person has always been friendly or at least polite in the communal areas.
 
i have just had the most ridiculous note-based exchange with some bitch who works in the same building (not same company).

someone has been stealing my milk from the shared kitchen. not a couple of cups of tea worth, a couple of bowls of cereal worth. so i put a note on saying stop stealing this.

the bitch then put a note on saying 'only if you stop cutting your nails into the sink in the toilets' *

i didn't think it was that likely it was her stealing the milk, but i pretended to believe that and responded with 'and that concerns you HOW, thief?'

she then left practically an essay about my unhygenic ways.

i removed all the notes except for the first and look forward to encountering her in the communal areas!

my extreme rage has diminished enough that i am now planning to patronise her about how she should have spoken to me directly like a grown-up.


* this is indeed something i've done a few times due to the good lighting. i'm aware that some people might consider this unhygenic but my hands are clean and the sinks get cleaned every single day. also, i wash them down the sink, i'm not an animal.

Does she use your milk on cereal? If so dump a load of tonail clippings in her museli. She'll get the hint
 
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