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Covid dilemma - what would you do?

Re his passport running out in May, he might not be able to go anyway. Sometimes you can't travel if you have less than six months left on your passport. I can't recall if that's a restriction imposed by some airlines or if it's some countries don't allow you to travel if you don't have at least six months left on your passport, but I recommend checking before buying expensive plane tickets, just in case he can't fly with a passport that's due to run out soon.

I know, it seems weird, if your passport hasn't yet expired, you'd think there wouldn't be a problem, but people with UK passports have been caught out by this before. Don't know if it would affect an Australian passport holder, or is he dual national, does he still have an Irish passport? Will he travel on that?

It might be that the decision is, effectively, already made and he can't go because of his passport? Or could he get it renewed quickly if need be?
 
Chairman Meow Really sorry for your awful situation :(

I'm another who says he should go. It's his brother.

Could you bear- and your marriage survive you being the reason he didn't say goodbye to his brother in person?

Sorry for the guilt trippiness of that, but it's better to consider it now than realise later, iyswim.
 
Agree with what the others have said generally, he'll always regret it if he doesn't go.

As far as closing the borders go while you obviously can't say for sure I think it's likely that ship has sailed in Australia now. Any fast spreading variant will be there before they can shut down again.
 
If it's any consolation Qld modelling was way out, and we were impacted far less than anticipated.
 
Chairman Meow said:
I'm not looking for judgement either way, and its obviously entirely his decision. He has asked for my opinion though. And I'm more worried about him getting Covid here before he goes I think, as it really is starting to sweep through here as no-one has had it here before. Last week I didn't know of a single person who had had Covid here, now I know five. So that making me pretty anxious in general, not just about this situation,
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So, what is your opinion? I think I can gather what your opinion is: don't go, too risky, too much to lose (and personally, I'd agree with that, but it's not my brother) but you are worried that saying that will make him stay and then there will be resentment and guilt? It's a terrible situation. Thanks pandemic shakes fist at pandemic :mad::mad:

Have you already told him what your opinion is?
 
Even when the WA border was closed compassionate exemptions were possible so the worst case, if the border closes again, would be two weeks in hotel quarantine. My neighbour got a compassionate exemption to leave Perth to go to a wedding in India last year!

There were also various 'underground railroad' options for getting into WA via the NT border near Kununurra. The WA border is more than 1,800km long and very porous...

E2A: Having said all of that, if getting stuck outside WA inevitably leads to financial ruin for the entire family then I wouldn't go. I've lost count of how many travel arrangements I have made then abandoned due to covid.
 
My opinion is that I really don't want him to go, but realize he probably has to. He has decided to apply for a new passport, then if he did get stuck at least he wouldn't have to worry about that. Apparently he wouldn't need six months on his passport at the minute as that has been suspended for now due to Covid, but I guess that rule could be re-instated, so best not risk it. Once he has his passport we will see how things are going here with the Covid situation, but all being well he will book a ticket. Have to say I will be shitting myself until he is back home again though. We are still on 2500 cases a day but hardly anyone in hospital, so hoping that the modelling is overly cautious like QLD, although anecdotally its ripping through Perth at the minute.

I know some people have got exemptions to re-enter WA while the border was shut, but a lot more people didn't, so I wouldn't trust that route! Also coming back in via Darwin etc. isn't cheap, although if it came to it...
 
Ok I'm bumping this to see if anyone has any ideas? My husband is flying back on Wednesday ( he just got his new passport). His brother is in very bad shape, in the hospice at the minute and struggling to swallow, so we expect he has weeks left. He has said once he can't eat or talk he wants to be let go. Husband is bringing back gifts for the kids, toys and Aussie sweets. It would be nice if he could bring back something for his brother, but really can't think of anything at all. If anyone has any ideas it would be much appreciated.
 
Ideas on what? I thought the dilemma was whether he should or shouldn't go, but he's going now?
 
Yes he is going. Ideas on something he could bring back to maybe make his brother smile for a minute, as apparently he is understandably very depressed at being about to die and leaving his wife and young family behind. I apologize for being a bit snippy, but its a difficult time as I am sure you can understand.
 
All the family photos are in Ireland already. My husband is bringing stuffed koalas and kangas for the kids so might look a bit odd bringing one for his brother. Its pretty impossible really, I can't think of anything to bring a dying man, there probably isn't anything! But thanks for the suggestions.
 
If it's not too hard to speak about (and it may be, of course), maybe your husband could help his brother with his own words/gifts to leave behind to his kids? Your husband will already have a ton of memories to offer there.

If not/anyway, it's just great that he will be there and that is enough.

Sending love and strength to you all through such difficult days xxx
 
Chairman Meow said:
All the family photos are in Ireland already. My husband is bringing stuffed koalas and kangas for the kids so might look a bit odd bringing one for his brother. Its pretty impossible really, I can't think of anything to bring a dying man, there probably isn't anything! But thanks for the suggestions.
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A piece of local indigenous art, like a small blanket or throw or towel. A bottle of locally produced alcohol, wine etc..
 
12333786-1x1-large.jpg


The most WA gift possible.
 
sheothebudworths said:
If it's not too hard to speak about (and it may be, of course), maybe your husband could help his brother with his own words/gifts to leave behind to his kids? Your husband will already have a ton of memories to offer there.
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Wrt this sort of thing, I remember hearing about something done by nurses working with young parents with end of life cancer. The parents were asked what they love/admire about their kids, and then third person pronouns were changed to second person (eg “I am so proud of their commitment to their art”, became “I am so proud of your commitment to your art”) and written in a book with family pictures for the children to keep. The end results were incredibly moving.

The huge proviso of me even mentioning this is that this was done by professionals with some clinical distance from the families, with training and supervision, and it was still emotionally taxing. So it would be extremely difficult if not impossible to do at length between two siblings. But if it seemed like a shorter version would be welcomed (like a paragraph for each kid) then patients found this process much easier than talking themselves in the second person.
 
Agent Sparrow said:
Wrt this sort of thing, I remember hearing about something done by nurses working with young parents with end of life cancer. The parents were asked what they love/admire about their kids, and then third person pronouns were changed to second person (eg “I am so proud of their commitment to their art”, became “I am so proud of your commitment to your art”) and written in a book with family pictures for the children to keep. The end results were incredibly moving.

The huge proviso of me even mentioning this is that this was done by professionals with some clinical distance from the families, with training and supervision, and it was still emotionally taxing. So it would be extremely difficult if not impossible to do at length between two siblings. But if it seemed like a shorter version would be welcomed (like a paragraph for each kid) then patients found this process much easier than talking themselves in the second person.
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I think it might be too late for anything as draining as that sounds, although I am sure it would be very moving. I think they have already done memory boxes for the kids.
 
I’m so sorry for your troubles Chairman Meow . It sounds very heavy for everyone.

When I dear friend was dying recently I gave him a silk hanky to hold. My friend really liked strong smells and each time I visited him I’d take a different essential oil (cloves, cinnamon, orange...) or aftershave or perfume (sometimes borrowed) and reload the silk hanky. He held the hanky the whole time, close to his face or tucked into his hand and he died holding it. Afterwards it felt like a very precious thing and everyone who loved him wanted to spend a little time holding it. Eventually it went with him to the crematorium.

I think a blanket or scarf is a really good idea. He can enjoy it while he lives and it can become a precious reminder of these precious last days after he is gone. It might sound morbid now but cloth that is in touch with the other person’s skin is evidence that they lived.
 
Just an update. My husband went over to Ireland for ten days and is now back home in Perth. His brother was very happy to see him, and it was a very worthwhile trip , everything went well (apart from him getting a middle row seat beside a screaming baby on the Perth Dubai flight). It was emotionally pretty tough, and there were lots of tears, but he is so glad he went. He didn't take anything for his brother in the end, but the toys and sweets and boomerangs and various Aussie nonsense went down very well with the kids, especially the Perth Monopoly game and the Nanoblock koala and kanga. :DHe took some great family pics too which will be very treasured. So thanks all for the suggestions and reassurance.:)
 
Another update. My brother in law is sinking fast. My husband's other brother is flying home from Florida cutting a family holiday short, and wanted my husband to go back too, understandable really. Phoned the travel agent and to go for a week was quoted over $10k! If he stayed two weeks, $4.5k. So that's not going to happen, he would probably not be back in time for anything other than a funeral anyway. So I'm very glad now he want back when he did. He was able to have a short chat with his brother last night and say last goodbyes, which was lucky as his brother hasn't been able to talk for a few days, think they jacked him up on whatever drugs so they could do it. I think its going to be a very difficult weekend. I'm heartbroken, I've known my brother in law for thirty years, he is like the brother I never had.. He is only 42 ( I think) and will leave a 4 and 9 year old, and a lovely wife.
 
Chairman Meow said:
Another update. My brother in law is sinking fast. My husband's other brother is flying home from Florida cutting a family holiday short, and wanted my husband to go back too, understandable really. Phoned the travel agent and to go for a week was quoted over $10k! If he stayed two weeks, $4.5k. So that's not going to happen, he would probably not be back in time for anything other than a funeral anyway. So I'm very glad now he want back when he did. He was able to have a short chat with his brother last night and say last goodbyes, which was lucky as his brother hasn't been able to talk for a few days, think they jacked him up on whatever drugs so they could do it. I think its going to be a very difficult weekend. I'm heartbroken, I've known my brother in law for thirty years, he is like the brother I never had.. He is only 42 ( I think) and will leave a 4 and 9 year old, and a lovely wife.
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God that’s devastating, so sorry :(
 
All flights out of Perth are insanely expensive right now. Pre-covid we had 2 x A380 to Dubai daily now plus Etihad to Abu Dhabi it's only just got back up to 1 x B777 to Dubai. That's a lot of missing capacity.
 
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