Best Red Dwarf Quotes

[Ralph Llama]

United America? Who's that? - Well, at the end of the 23rd century, America attempted to bring peace to the world by asking every nation on Earth to sign a peace treaty.
Any nation that refused, they invaded.
Now, a war ensued that was called the War Against War.
Those countries who went to war because they were so against war, they were prepared to go to war to fight in a war against war, called themselves United America.

political saitires from the last series

So this is really me? A no-style gimbo with teeth the Druids could use as a place of worship?

from Back to Reality one of the best episodes imao.

 

[A380]

Three minutes. And that includes the time it took to eat the pizza.

 

[Steel Icarus]

Even as a kid I sort of instinctively realised it was mainly unfunny, dorky nonsense. The epitome of wacky. The only kids I knew who liked it were that particular subset of kids one rung below the losers like me (who at least could pretend there was some kind of dignity and self-determination in our estrangement). Those kids with like incurable diseases or obsessive interests in home electronics and modems.

 

[Crispy]

"Smeg off, smeg for brains"

 

[jusali]

Dwayne Dibley?

 

[kabbes]

His only crime is being Arnold J. Rimmer. That is also his punishment.