The Histories of Bouldergloves - A Dwarf Fortress Succession Game

[Crispy]

First dragon picks up minnie_the_minx in one hand, and her baby in the other. Foolish soldiers and their war babies.

With one hand, it dashes disemboweled baby Zasit against the floor. With the other, it disables Minnie_The_Minx by strangling, before crushing her brain.

frogwoman steps in and kills murderous dragon with with axeblows to head. Battle otherwise goes well. dotcommunist beheads a dragon with one swipe. Even novice soldiers make kills. FractionMan makes five strong hits to a dragons head:

When blood ceases to fly, the outcome is eight dead dragons and one dead recruit. This is a favourable trade.

21st Timber, 129

I order all squads to gather inside courtyard in perparation for next wave. Two main forces oppose us: To the East, ranged troops. To the Southwest, pikemen. After some indecision on both parts, they begin their approaches. At last moment, pikemen swerve and ignore traps.

Badgers decides to engage. Those are not your orders, dwarf! To preserve his chances, I send in The Scratches and the raw recruits. I order to concentrate on goblins, not their mounts. Pikes are more deadly than bites.

As last caravan enters trade depot, I send out The Wires to intercept incoming crossbowmen. Ranged enemies are deadly to unarmoured dwarves. Meanwhile, Badgers has initial success with combat, driving his spear into Gobin limbs. But doom now faces him in the form a Goblin Swordmaster, leader of this pack. Badgers' blows are easily deflected. The swordmaster takes off his foot with one swipe. dotcommunist would be useful now, but he is already in hospital with an injured foot.

It is recruit Lord Camomile who overcomes the Swordmaster. Knocking it off balance and removing its hand. Without two hands, it cannot grip its two-handed sword. Now this formidable enemy is declawed, I order all squads to attack crossbowmen.

But it seems that the goblins have had enough. Both packs retreat rapidly to the East. Gramsci, fisherdwarf, minding his own business, is in wrong place at wrong time and goes down in hail of corssbow bolts.

Lord Camomile, desperate to finish what he started, harries the one-handed swordmaster accross the brook. Now the goblin is steady on its feet, all blows are parried. Straggling pikeman goblin uses distraction as opportunity to strike unopposed. Lord Camomile goes down.

24th Timber, 129

At exact same moment as last Goblin crosses our border and retreats for good, moggy completes his masterpiece. It is a fine weapon, but of even greater use is moggy's new-found legendary weaponsmith skill. Now Bouldergloves can be armed with the finest weapons known to dwarfkind!

 

[Shippou-Sensei]

Gramsci used to be a dwarf like you until he took an arrow to the everything.

Gramsci 'Boromir' Honestmind

 

[Crispy]

3rd Moonstone, 129

Drainage shaft to caverns is complete. Treefrog prepares to release cistern overflow. Breakthough is carefully aligned to minimise current.

Spoiler: game mechanics

Water will flow through a diagonal gap between tiles, but in doing so reduces its pressure to "sea level". Water tiles with more water tiles above act under pressure and can flow much faster than a dwarf can outrun. By digging out the corner tile, treefrog should be able to escpae through the door and avoid the flood.

The procedure is a smooth success and the Great Hall can finally start to drain. The caverns begin to flood.

13th Moonstone, 129

The Great Hall is now sufficiently drained for Dwarves to wade. Some immediately take seats and eat their meals. Despite wet feet, the hall is still impressive enough to inspire happy thoughts.

15th Moonstone, 129

I almost forgot to send Fridgemagnet to the trade depot. I buy all their wood, food and alcohol, plus some steel items for melting. We are running low on gold crafts for trade, so I order more made.

21st Moonstone, 129

I realise catacombs are full. I order more coffins. Some dwarves are still reported missing. The full tally of deaths from first great battle of Bouldergloves may never be known.

27th Moonstone, 129

Three levels above the ground, on top of resumed Sky Tower construction, stuff_it is carrying granite block and finds goblin limb. Three levels up! It must have been impressive combat move to have it travel so far. No combat log exists of the event. Congratulations, whichever dwarf managed this, it is a fine dismemberment.

Spoiler: game mechanic

When a combatent uses an edged weapon to attack and the target body part "sails off in an arc", then it really does go flying in the game world. This particular body part flew at least 9 meters in the air (DF tiles are 2m wide and 3m tall, including floors.

8th Opal, 129

A mournful hooing and flapping is heard in the cavern.

It is a surity that such creatures will eventually find any entrance to a fortress. I order all military dwarves to the forges, where we have just such an entrance. We wait.

20th Opal, 129

Waiting is tedious and thirsty work. I detask military and resume overseeing Sky Tower construction. It is delicate work, for dwarves easily wall each other in.

Spoiler: game mechanic

God, I wish I'd never started this bloody thing! I'm having to designate construction block by block, because the dwarves just love to build things in stupid order and trap themselves on the wrong side of an impassable wall. I might try lots of staircases as scaffolding

2nd Obsidian, 129

Noloc the forgotten beast continues to flap and hover in the cavern, many tiles away from forterss doors. My fear is that we will think ourselves safe until the months dull our memories. Combat with the beast is inevitable. It should be on our terms.

Our strength is diminished after the battle against the Goblins. Dotcommunist's left foot will never work again and he will be on crutch for rest of his life. But he maintains high spirits and still has firm grip of his axe.

I order all combat dwarves to muster at the forges and consider strategy. I will send crossbows first, to bring it out of the air. Once grounded, The Scratches will come in for main attack.

Before dwarves even reach the forges, Noloc reaches the door. He rushes in and heads straight for the main stairwell. This is bad news for Bouldergloves. Now we must fight in confined conditions.

My fears are misplaced. frogwoman shows martial skill to match her husband's. Meeting the beast on the stair, she is vicious with her axe, inflicting multiple wounds. Flesh is torn. Bones are broken. Finally, she takes aim at its head and removes it in one stroke. A superb kill.

frogwoman and dotcommunist are now husband and wife team of superlative soldiers.

 

[DotCommunist]

 

[Crispy]

Something like that, yeah

 

[fuck seals]

what of me? the lack of commentary is worrying me now.

froggy & dwarfcommunist worry me more tbh

excellent work crisps

 

[Crispy]

what of me? the lack of commentary is worrying me now.

froggy & dwarfcommunist worry me more tbh

excellent work crisps

You have no kills, I'm afraid, despite being drafted for the goblin battle.



I should set a bunch of animal traps tbh and put your animal training skills to use. A pack of War Mountain Goats would be a thing to behold.

 

[DotCommunist]

what of me? the lack of commentary is worrying me now.

froggy & dwarfcommunist worry me more tbh

excellent work crisps

Frodwarf still has use of both feet, I'm stuck with a laming here. If I take point again I fear that I shall be undone by something shit like a Kobold or a Quagga.

 

[DotCommunist]

Or a slime mold. 'You have eaten the slime mold. It was disgusting!'

this is like a really arcane dungeon builders type of rougue-alike is it? I just realised this

 

[Crispy]

You're not as fast as you were, so I suspect froggy will be point dwarf from now on. However, with time, your crutchwalking skills will let you keep up.

Or a slime mold. 'You have eaten the slime mold. It was disgusting!'

this is like a really arcane dungeon builders type of rougue-alike is it? I just realised this

It totally is. The games has two main modes - Fortress mode is what I'm playing, but there's also Adventure mode, which is a full-on roguelike. The world map I included in post #1 is fully explorable on foot. The total area that I'm playing Bouldergloves on takes up 4x4 pixels on that map. It's huge. I could abandon this fortress and come along with my adventurer and reclaim its treasures

 

[frogwoman]

wow ive got this secret life i didn't know about.

do i have an invisibility cloak? and a dagger

 

[frogwoman]

also how do i play this game? or are you playing it on my behalf crispy like some sort of vanguardist fighting the revolution on behalf ofd the class

 

[Crispy]

wow ive got this secret life i didn't know about.

do i have an invisibility cloak? and a dagger

You have clothes made of spider silk and pig tail fibre (pig tail is a sort of plant)
You're wearing steel armour (breastplate, greaves, gauntlets)
You carry a steel battle axe and you have six kills - 1 serpent man, 1 troglodyte, 3 cave dragons and 1 forgotten beast: Noloc Arrowslaughter, the Murky Roar of Bites.
Both your hands bear deep scars. You are very muscular and durable, quick to heal, slow to tire and rarely sick.
You have willpower, and good kinesthetic and spatial senses.

You are getting used to tragedy.

 

[Crispy]

also how do i play this game?

With great difficulty

or are you playing it on my behalf crispy like some sort of vanguardist fighting the revolution on behalf of the class

Pretty much

 

[frogwoman]

You have clothes made of spider silk and pig tail fibre (pig tail is a sort of plant)
You're wearing steel armour (breastplate, greaves, gauntlets)
You carry a steel battle axe and you have six kills - 1 serpent man, 1 troglodyte, 3 cave dragons and 1 forgotten beast: Noloc Arrowslaughter, the Murky Roar of Bites.
Both your hands bear deep scars. You are very muscular and durable, quick to heal, slow to tire and rarely sick.
You have willpower, and good kinesthetic and spatial senses.

You are getting used to tragedy.

i think the willpower thing is the only one that's correct in that

 

[Stigmata]

Do I exist in this game? Am I the gong farmer or what

 

[fuck seals]

/snip
this is like a really arcane dungeon builders type of rougue-alike is it? I just realised this

head this is nail; nail let me introduce you to head

 

[fuck seals]

You have no kills, I'm afraid, despite being drafted for the goblin battle.

I should set a bunch of animal traps tbh and put your animal training skills to use. A pack of War Mountain Goats would be a thing to behold.

i am married to pingu? i mean wtf wtf wtf. i was secretly hoping for callie

 

[Crispy]

Do I exist in this game? Am I the gong farmer or what

Yes, you're in.



You're a useful Armorsmith. Maybe one day you'll have a mood and produce an artifact armour...

 

[Crispy]

I had to install a special viewer app to get an idea of how the Sky Tower's looking. I think this one visualises each tile as a cube, which is incorrect, as it's much squatter than I planned. The little sub-tower on the left is an extension of the central stair core. The view is from the top of Blood Hill.

 

[Stigmata]

Yes, you're in.

View attachment 33428

You're a useful Armorsmith. Maybe one day you'll have a mood and produce an artifact armour...

"Doesn't go out of own way to do more work than necessary"

The bit about liking bees is accurate as well

 

[DotCommunist]

You're a useful Areorsmith. Maybe one day you'll walk this way and talk this way
ftw

 

[frogwoman]

Is there a picture of me on this thing?

 

[Crispy]

Is there a picture of me on this thing?

No picture as such, but you can let your imagination draw something from this description:



Basically, you're badass, but a bit socially awkward

 

[frogwoman]

a short sturdy creature fond of drink and industry

I can deal with that

 

[Shippou-Sensei]

Those text blocks need better punctuation

 

[Crispy]

This is the History of Spring

17th Slate, 130

All spring long I toil at the Sky Tower. It occupies my every waking hour and I neglect rest of fortress. But fortress is self sufficient now. All food and alcohol needs are met. All soldiers are finely equipped. It is six weeks since the new year and I have barely paid attention to matters below ground. I am interrupted by a shout from below. Migrants! Curse them and their bedroom needs. There are thirty of them and they will all need naming.

I come to the great hall to greet them. What I find disgusts me. The floor is coated with mud. There are shrubs growing. Shrubs! This must not stand. I order construction of new floor.

21st Slate, 130

Another dwarven child is gripped by a creative urge. Bouldergloves desperately needs more untradeable mastercraft jewelry. Edzul gathers a worryingly varied list of materials.

28th Slate, 130

He is finished. The object is garishly overdecorated. Edzul, you have an overactive imagination.

 

[Crispy]

This is the History of Summer

3rd Hematite, 130

The new Great Hall floor is almost complete, but dwarves are being put off their food by sprectral baby. There is no record of parentage. I order slabs to be made for engraving. Once memorialised, this baby will rest properly.

18th Hematite, 130

The summer election has brought a change of mayor. I step down from position and give up fine quarters to rich! who shall set mandates for next year.

Great Hall will have grating in center to prevent any future flooding. It will drain directly into cistern. I order cistern unsealed. Dwarf child Amost does the demolition work.

Upon breaking through, he gazes into the depths of the pool. He is shocked by what he sees.

The skeletons of many dead dwarves. isvicthere, equationgirl, MrsDarlingsKiss, Hollis and migrant Olon Likotbekar. Watching over the dead is ghost of Hollis, a mournful spirit that lingers at the site of its death.Retrieving these bodies is impossible without some significant water management. They will have to remain when cistern is resealed.

22nd Hematite, 130

Frogwoman has become one with her axe. She knows its weight and balance. It is as much a part of her body as her hands are. It is an extension of her very being. She names it.

In your tongue it means DredgeWorker MustyCeiling Scandal. The meaning is lost somewhat in translation.

4th Malachite, 130

I negelected to dissallow hunting amongst new migrants. As a result, three of them have been merrily exploring the caverns without permission. They have unearthed a small flock of Elk Birds and got themselves into trouble. Reno has had his left foot torn open and is bleeding on the floor. He must be rescued. They must be destroyed.

The combined forces of The Scratches and The Staves (recruit squad) are unleashed. Recruits TitanSound and yardbird are first to strike. TitanSound takes one bruising swing of his mace before caving Elk Bird skull in with toe of his boot. Yardbird stabs repeatedly and takes many opportunites to wrench her spear around in the wounds.

xes, professional sodlier, strolls up and demolishes Elk Bird brain with one axe blow.

The scene is bloody. But it is solely Elk Bird blood. No combat dwarf is injured in raid. Further glory to Bouldergloves.

12th Malachite, 130

Migrants. Eleven of them. One half competent armoursmith among them, named Mrs Magpie. I immediately put her to work fulfilling mayor rich!'s mandate for shield production.

15th Malachite, 130

The time has come. We will dig deep once more and locate that most precious metal. I dare not speak its name until I see it with my own eyes. I designate opening of mineshaft.

25th Malachite, 130

Ah. There it lies. Embedded in magma, rooted in the deepest levels of the world. Adamantine. Most precious. Most sharp. Object of all dwarven desire. And we will mine it.

I note location spied through hole in ceiling and mine sideways to approach from above and below. Mining the substance is a delicate challenge. Some veins are known to be hollow and we do not, under any circumstances at all, wish to examine the contents.

3rd Galena, 130

Very very carefully, we are revealing raw adamantine. I order workshops built at this low level, for refining the ore into strands.

12th Galena, 130

Ringo, peasant, is taken by a mood. This is perhaps most unskilled dwarf in entire fortress. What he makes will be entirely up to chance. He claims a craftsdwarf's workshop and gathers bone, mica, sheep's wool and many gems.

A goblin master thief is spotted by Firky, woodcutter, as he heads out to chop trees. Goblin responds by chopping Firky's leg off. Goblin chooses to do this in full sight of training yards. It does not bode well for goblin.

xes and frogwoman take turns removing body parts before tearing apart the brain. Gore is spread everywhere.

19th Galena, 130

Ringo completes his artifact. It is a chest made of bone. Another decoration for the Great Hall.

20th Galena, 130

A small squad of goblins has come to harrass. A large force of dwarves is sent to counter-harass. All military dwarves get taste of blood as the goblin bolts fly wild. Our armour is strong and they mostly bounce off. Even dotcommunist, not as fast on his feet foot as he once was, is close enough to join in the slaughter.

The battle gore blends in with the pools of human blood. Only dwarven casualty is Ceej, struck in the spine with crossbow bolt, paralyzing her and preventing her from breathing.

 

[Crispy]

This is the History of Autumn

18th Limestone, 130

It is complete. Bouldergloves' first pure refined bar of adamantine. In time, moggy will create masterful edged weapons with this precious metal. In The Scratches' hands, they will be unstoppable.

19th Limestone, 130

I have brought our collection of trapped creatures to the surface. They are a source of great interest to our soldiers, who crowd round them, taunting the captives. I order a lever connected so that the creatures may be released for entertainment purposes.

I forgot to save a picture of the slaughter. Sorry!

21st Limestone, 130

A goblin thief is spotted at the fortress entrance. He does not live long. To think that a mere two years ago, such attackers stood serious chance of killing large proportion of Bouldergloves dwarves. Now we butcher them casually and without danger.

16th Sandstone, 130

The refuse pile is becoming unwieldy. There is a solution. We build a small drawbridge in an enclosed room. I designate garbage zone under its footprint. I order dwarves to dump all contents of refuse pile. When lever is pulled, garbage items will be obliterated.

18th Sandstone, 130

Thirteen migrants. Unskilled. Naming. Make beds. Etc.

23rd Sandstone, 130

rich! alters his production mandate.

This will be difficult. Gem cutters cannot be ordered to specifically create the large variety. Indeed, they are quite rare. I assign much gem cutting and hope for best.

4th Timber, 130

Surface Bouldergloves is a mess. From humble beginnings, construction has been piecemeal and unplanned. There is no symmetry. There are no ramparts. We do not say to the world that dwarves are great architects, we say that dwarves do not care for their structures. There are forty seven idle dwarves. This labour can be better used.

17th Timber, 130

The caravan has arrived. They are expectant of gold riches. Bouldergloves can oblige.

18th Timber, 130

Calamity! In a foolish designation, I have sealed dwarves in while constructing bedrooms. Among them, Fridgemagnet, founding dwarf and trader, and Citizen66, legendary stonemason. They have died of dehydration; an ignoble end for such noble dwarves. This is a dark day for Bouldergloves and a stain on my record.

Meanwhile, xes has reached pinnacles of axedwarfship, attaining rank of Axe Lord. Surviving dwarves of sealing-in accident are unhappy and throw tantrums. With time, quality of Bouldergloves decorations will cheer them up.

25th Timber, 130

Rich! is in his quarters when approached by liaison from Rith Ellis. An important question is put to him.

This is an honour. We will gain the title of Mountainhome, and will join the ranks of nobility. We will no longer be an outpost, but a true dwarven city. But this means submitting to Queen Udil's ultimate rule. The vampire queen is many miles away, however. She cannot dictate our actions. In time, she might even visit us and that will be a grand opportunity for all of us. I advise rich! to accept the offer. Naturally, I am selected for the role of Baron.

 

[Crispy]

This is the History of Winter

7th Moonstone, 130

Frogwoman joins xes in Axelord status. Dotcommunist is not far behind.

10th Moonstone, 130

Snadge, victim of the Great Trapping has had enough. His will has snapped and he has gone berserk and sets out to pick fights with any dwarves he can find. I order The Scratches to hurry things along.

xes is vicious. It is neccesary.

17th Moonstone, 130

What? How? Where have the traders gone? Why have they left all their items? Where is the trade depot?!?

I realise my mistake. In amongst building and demolition orders for New Bouldergloves, I have ordered the trade depot destroyed. While the merchants were in it. And now our own dwarves are carrying the items inside as if they were our own. This will not go down well with the queen.

21st Moonstone, 130

shakespeargirl is next dwarf to go insane and be put down by our skilled soldiers. Two such happenings force me to pay attention to moral of all dwarves. There are five who are truly unhappy: JimW, who has lost much family recently: child, spouse and father. He is skilled crossbowdwarf, but is slow to anger and should not be a danger. Lazy Llama, Ms T, Reno and toggle are also unhappy. We must watch them carefully for any signs of insanity.

23rd Moonstone, 130

I spoke too soon. toggle has snapped and gone stark raving mad. Lazy llama follows soon after. They have both begun to babble incoherently and remove their clothes. A pitiful sight but we can do nothing but wait for the inevitable.

1st Opal, 130

Dwarf Sirena has claimed a magma forge, bringing adamantine, zircons and cloth. She must use that adamantine well, for it is a very limited in supply.

15th Opal, 130

Sirena has made a fine amulet.

17th Opal, 130

The liaison has finally left Bouldergloves, and I have become Baron. My tastes are immediately more refined and I demand more lavish quarters. I resign as mayor and longdog is elected in my place. I am sure he will do well. Now dwarves! Build me my palace!

21st Opal, 130

Reno, one of our unhappy dwarves, must think hard on what he has done. His sorrow is understandable, for he has endured much.

However, he should not have taken out his frustrations on other dwarves.

A terrible waste of newly legendary craftsdwarf. Let us hope that he cheers up soon.

3rd Obsidian, 130

Hoping was not enough, for Reno has gone beserk. When insanity takes him, he is in Mayor Longdog's quarters. He wastes no time in killing the mayor. The Scratches hurry down the stairs.

dotcommunist arrives to dispense justice the only way he knows how. He systematically chops off all of Reno's limbs.

That is one fewer miserable dwarf in Bouldergloves. Maurice Picarda is elected mayor.

5th Obsidian, 130

The perimeter wall of New Bouldergloves is complete. A full seventy in diameter, it menaces with foundations of granite and chert. Two entrances, as before. The Northern for friends, the Southern for foes. Both are lined with gold. I designate obsolete structures for demolition. This area will be paved. Statues will line the avenues. Fountains will delight with their mists. Civilisation on the surface, in the name of The Lean Rim I command it as Baron!

24th Obsidian, 130

To work fountains, we will need to tame the brook. With wheels, we will draw power. With power, we will drive pumps. With pumps, we will elevate water to great heights. Water falling from great heights is perhaps the finest sight a dwarf can see. All unhappy thoughts are to be banished in happy clouds of mist.