The Histories of Bouldergloves - A Dwarf Fortress Succession Game

[Crispy]

This is the History of Autumn

2nd Limestone, 131

Bouldergloves recuperates. In the hospital lies our most unhappy dwarf, rutabowa. Unhappiness is relative. He has many happy thoughts as befits a citizen of this splendid fortress, but they are tainted by thoughts of death and pain. Maurice Picarda competently sutures his wounds. It will take time, but he shall recover eventually.

Spoils of war include four female cave dragons. These formidable beasts are now property of Bouldergloves. Wild and dangerous, they cannot be tamed. I begin plans for zoo.

7th Limestone, 131

All of Bouldergloves is busy. Constructing replacement pumps. Repairing holes in floor. Storing war booty. Building zoo. Moving caged creatures.

22nd Limestone, 131

Zoo is complete, in East wing of New Bouldergloves. It holds our four great cave dragons. They are named Usbu, Mato, Osta and Usbu again. They will never taste freedom. Zoo is instant favorite with dwarves.

12th Sandstone, 131

8ball receives creative inspiration. She is talented weaponsmith and will no doubt create legendary weapon. I have prepared a workshop for just such occasions. With its own supply of steel and adamantine, she shall use it to create a wonderous artifact. I lock doors to all other forges.

I forget that there is back stair. 8ball claims a regular forge. Her daughter Meng watches over her work.

21st Sandstone, 131

More migrants? What madness is this? Bouldergloves bulges yet still they come. Very well. We have spare beds. Thirteen new dwarves for hauling.

I may enlarge our military soon. Between periods of excitement and construction, we have many idle hands.

Spoiler: game mechanic

I thought I put a limit on migration! I'll have to fix this. Endless growth will end up killing performance as more and more dwarves have to pathfind through the fortress.

22nd Sandstone, 131

8ball is worrying me.

She needs cut gems, stone, leather and metal. Bouldergloves has all in abundance. Perhaps she is being picky. I ask husband emanymanton of her preferences. It seems that her favorite metal is sterling silver. We have none, but we do have silver and copper. I make order at smelter.

5th Timber, 131

My worries were unfounded. Whatever was holding 8ball back has released its grip. She gathers an impressive array of materials and begins her craft.

7th Timber, 131

We have run out of granite blocks! Inconceivable! I order copious mining and set all masons workshops to block manufacture.

12th Timber, 131

8ball has taken adamantine, that magical metal, light as feathers, sharp as glass, and made a blunt weapon with it. Wooden maces are more deadly. She gains no experience from her possessed mood either. At least she is happy.

As she leaves to store useless weapon, she hears a scuttling. A pack of crundles gathers outside the forges. They are pathetic creatures.

We have quite a collection of leather and bone in Bouldergloves, but no crundle parts. I order attack.

While bulk of dwarves chase crundles off into caverns, fractionMan alone approaches the crundles in their lair.

The slaughter is rapid. No crundle gets a blow in.

Spoiler: battle report

Completely pointless reporting. I knew these things were weak, but they go down at the slightest tap of a masterwork steel axe. No fun at all

17th Timber, 131

Thank the gods, the caravan has not been put off by last year's accidental theft. Merchants holler from top of blood hill. Now we can trade back all the weird and useless items they left behind. Bouldergloves does not need toys and flutes. It needs drink, wood and weapons. Let us trade!

24th Timber, 131

I am taken aback. Rith Ellis sends seven wagons of goods for trade. We are honoured. We trade all broken clothes, non-steel weapons and armour, useless toys and crafts, and few gold crafts. We take all wood, drink food and steel. Bouldergloves is stocked for many years now.

As liaison departs, I receive great news. Our position is elevated. These lands are now a county and I am their Count. I order upgrades to my chambers, befitting my rank.

 

[DotCommunist]

Frogwoman and dotcommunist exhibit their skill together. They have brought their baby again, thinking that they can protect it, but this time their enemies are too many and it is soon brought down.

Take that, CSA

 

[stuff_it]

It took you that long? You must lice at the arse end of the internet.

 

[Crispy]

When I get to the end of this year, I'm going to have a think about where to go next (sorry bees, I'll do that train at some point!). Stigmata has a good point - there isn't much risk any more, and grand construction projects are rather boring to write about. I might report year 132 in highlights, rather than the rather obsessive style I've been using so far.

This is by far my most successful Dwarf Fortress game though. Something's *got* to wrong now, surely?

 

[DotCommunist]

It took you that long? You must lice at the arse end of the internet.

arselice is technically crabs

 

[DotCommunist]

When I get to the end of this year, I'm going to have a think about where to go next (sorry bees, I'll do that train at some point!). Stigmata has a good point - there isn't much risk any more, and grand construction projects are rather boring to write about. I might report year 132 in highlights, rather than the rather obsessive style I've been using so far.

This is by far my most successful Dwarf Fortress game though. Something's *got* to wrong now, surely?

can you go to War?

 

[Crispy]

can you go to War?

it is planned for future versions, but not yet
There's loads of goblin forts the other side of the mountains and all...

 

[beesonthewhatnow]

When I get to the end of this year, I'm going to have a think about where to go next (sorry bees, I'll do that train at some point!). Stigmata has a good point - there isn't much risk any more, and grand construction projects are rather boring to write about. I might report year 132 in highlights, rather than the rather obsessive style I've been using so far.

Nah, keep it up, it's ace I like seeing just how detailed some of the stuff in the game is

 

[el-ahrairah]

It took you that long? You must lice at the arse end of the internet.

 

[Crispy]

This is the History of Winter

5th Opal, 131

First floor of New Bouldergloves is under construction. Here will be barracks, armouries and training rooms. First completed training room is dedicated to The Helmed Scratches. Frowoman completes one round of training and becomes Axe Lord. She is mighty.

On square boundary towers, we build fortifications. From here, crossbows will rain bolts on our enemies. Only the very skilled will attempt the reverse.

Spoiler: game mechanic

Dwarves will only see through and fire at things on the other side of a fortification if they are right up against it, so it's wise to construct a wall one tile back to force them alongside. Only legendary enemy archers can fire back through and hit the dwarf within. However, a wall at their back makes dodging incoming bolts difficult, as it removes 3 of the 5 possible dodging directions. The solution is a wall of statues. Statues can be dodged into (and the dwarf pops back out again), but not walked on. They herd the marksdwarves, but do not impede their dodging.

17th Opal, 131

Metalworkers report of strange noises. First one animal, then another. The sounds of surface animals, where there should be none. Even the sounds of dwarven industry: Ringing hammers, rasping saws. We know of the lyrebird's great talent for mimicry, but at this volume, the bird must be of gargantuan proportions. We must plan for the worst. All military dwarves are summoned to the forges.

Uno the Forgotten Beast marches directly towards forges. It can smell dwarf through the doors. ViolentPanda is first to muster. I order him forwards to test the beast's mettle. He is a brave dwarf and heads out alone. I count his chances. It does not take long to count them.

ViolentPanda's first blow is a strong one. Uno's response is to emit noxious poison.

ViolentPanda's poisoned weapon hand begins to throb.

Despite the pain, he makes another strike, fracturing Uno's wing bones. But it is not a killing blow. Uno's vastness is in its favour when push comes to shove. It pushes ViolentPanda's skull through his brain and shoves his body into the wall.

His death was honourable and useful both. He scored severe blows and tested non-lethality of poisons. I feel confident in Bouldergloves ability to slay Uno, so order the attack in full. xes leads charge of good range of weapons.

He carries a legendary steel axe with seven kills to its name. His first attack is a punch to the head. In reply, Uno charges and bowls him over. It begins to go like ViolentPanda's death, but xes is superior dodger and scrambles away from followup.

As frogwoman arrives, xes stands up and they both attack, causing deep flesh wounds.

Uno bleeds profusely from its upper leg. It is fighting poorly.

xes chops uno's beak off. Now its cries emit only from its trunk. They are ragged and mournful. pigtails thrusts her spear into its belly, tearing its guts. frogwoman's weapon hand begins to throb. Now xes removes its trunk with his axe and the only noise it makes is a spluttering gurgle of blood and poison gas. It is savage butchery from all sides. The record will show that xes made the kill, but it is team effort. Glory to Bouldergloves. Death to invaders.

18th Opal, 131

As frogwoman heads home, she trails blood. She has no visible wounds, but the fever continues to ache in her right hand, which so recently held her legendary axe, DredgeWorker. The effects of Beast poisons are as varied as the gems of the earth. She attends hospital and awaits diagnosis by emanymanton.

 

[Crispy]

21st Opal, 131

Spanky Longhorn, our current mayor, is upset with his furniture provision.

Very well, Spanky, I shall order one for you. We have the steel.

frogwoman appears cured of her feverous hand. She spars with her husband in The Scratches' new training room.

23rd Opal, 131

Wilf, ranger, dared to hunt a giant cave spider. He has paid for his daring with entrapment in its webs, and injection with its poison. He struggles in his predicament, but it is futile. Giant cave spider venom is known for its paralysing ability. He will suffocate if he is not eaten first.

This beast must not be engaged at close range. Even the most skilled axe lord may be webbed and bitten. We must engage at range. I order The Wires to attack. May their bolts fly true.

Wilf cannot move from the torso up. His utter defencelessness allows the spider to rip into his head and neck. It is not known if the venom also dulls pain, for those afflicted cannot speak to tell. For Wilf's sake, I hope that it does.

But he is keeping the spider distracted, which is useful.

Stanley Edwards and 5tella arrive and let loose a volley of crossbow bolts. Stanley scores very lucky hit.

But it was never going to be quick enough for Wilf, who bleeds to death. We will weave all this silk into cloth to clothe Bouldergloves.

15th Obsidian, 131

For the second time this year, the goblins mount an attack. They come in three melee squads from the North, and one archer squad from the south. Trolls support from the East and West. The enemy number eighty six in total, by far the largest assault yet. This will be first test of Bouldergloves fortifications and archery defence. All soldiers are ordered to first floor of New Bouldergloves, all civilians are ordered inside, and the North gate is closed. Let them come.

The Eastern trolls are first to arrive. They are not agile, and are all cut into pieces by the traps.

Next, goblin archers test the entrance. Kalidarkone, straggler from construction works on first floor, takes arrows to the thigh and hand. She collapses and gives in to pain. She will be rescued after the battle, providing she retains blood.

Half the archers are messily dispatched in the traps. The other half hold back and continue taking shots at Kalidarkone. She is unconscious, so cannot feel the impact of more arrows. Meanwhile, the Western trolls approach. One of them manages to pass through, but it is grievously wounded; its upper and lower body is cut open, spilling its guts, its spine is broken, and both its kidneys are ruptured. It manages two tiles before collapsing.

Two of our animals were pastured on wrong side of wall - a goose and a rooster. Macegoblins make brief detour to batter them into pulp.

The traps are now so clogged with troll organs that they are sluggish. A pack of them enters the courtyard. Now is the time for combat. All melee troops are ordered into battle. frogwoman and xes lead the charge.

One troll ignores the fight. Trailing blood, it heads down the stairs. It meets fractionMan coming up them.

frogwoman and xes decapitate their foes. The trolls are boisterous and knock dwarves around, but armour protects them and they re-foot themselves. Edged weapons cut deep wounds in soft troll flesh.

frogwoman chases fast troll. xes battles mighty troll, which repeatedly knocks him to the floor. Other loose troll chases a ram around in circles.

As other dwarves clear up in the courtyard, xes regains Axe Lord status and takes fight to goblin pikemen. It is a splendid scene. The traps whir and slice. The mighty dwarf dances between the spinning blades, dealing finishing blows.

Spoiler: I thought he was an Axe Lord already?

Skills get rusty when not used. I had all military on stand-down while constructing the new barracks, so they all lost a few XP in their combat abilities. Getting stuck in to a proper fight soon fixed that.

The ram runs up ramp to first floor.
The troll chases the ram.
Stuff_it chases the troll.

One of The Wires glimpses the chase around corner of wall and lets loose a single bolt. It strikes the troll in the leg, bringing it to the floor. The ram stops running and fights back. Stuff_it joins in with her axe. They are perfect team.

At entrance xes, frogwoman and dotcommunist stand side by side. With their comrades bi0boy, pigtails, rutabowa, Favelado and Grotty Scutta, they number eight. They face nineteen goblins. Those are good odds.

More butchery follows. The Scratches do what they do best and reduce goblins to piles of limbs and organs. Remainder of goblin squad retreats, but reinforcements are on way. Only bi0boy considers them a threat and engages alone.

He is soon backed up by his fellows of The Staves, and they easily overwhelm. Their morale broken, the goblins flee. But dwarves of Bouldergloves show no mercy and give pursuit. All but one are killed.

21st Obsidian, 131

There has been no greater victory in history of Bouldergloves. of eighty six invaders, over sixty are dead. The rest have fled. We have sustained no fatalities. Soldiers have no disabling wounds. Only major casualty is Kalidarkone, who has lived out the battle on top of wall. She is carried to hospital by Red Rose.

Her injuries are many, but she is sturdy dwarf and Maurice Picarda is fine doctor.

 

[Crispy]

I've got Stonesense up and running, which is a live visualiser, but not an interface for the game. It's pretty, but actually makes things confusing, so I don't use it for actual play. Here are some shots of Bouldergloves, from the bottom up. Bear in mind that the play area is 3x as wide in both directions than is visible in these images.

Z-level 20: This is near the very bottom of the world. The only reason to come down here is to mine Adamantium. I also have a small processing industry for it, so dwarves don't have to carry the raw ore upstairs.

Z-level 122: The metalwork industry, powered by magma.

Z-level 141: The top cavern layer (there are three). This is full of water now, after many months of collecting water from the turbine outlet. I made sure the lowest point was tunnelled to the edge of the map so it can drain, otherwise the whole thing would fill up eventually and the system would back up, preventing the water wheels from running.

Z-level 168: Burial chambers. As a noble, Crispy requires a valuable tomb set aside or he gets unhappy. Dotcommunist and Frogwoman are not invincible: When they do meet their ends, they will rest together in fine tombs. Some careless dwarf has discarded a pair of trousers in there.

Z-level 171: Crispy's quarters and typical residential area.

Z-level 174: Main floor. The colour of the walls is determined by the stone type. Here, the Northwest parts of the Great Hall are made of Jet, hence the dark colour. There's little pools of blood by the waterfall grates, because the mist washes it off the dwarves, but there's no flowing water to carry it away.

Z-level 176: The Surface. That trail of blue troll blood stands out a mile. You can see where I'm going to extend the ceiling of the Great Hall. Also note how bare the ground is in the pasture. Hungry animals.

Z-level 178: New Bouldergloves. I turned the dwarf names on but you can't read them at this zoom. Never mind. Four barracks for melee troops on the East side, with a planned archery range in the middle. The Western side will look different.

Z-level 188: Top of the tower. This is as high as any dwarf can get. I would build taller, but it's a pain in the arse.

 

[fractionMan]

it makes my fortress look like a hovel

 

[Crispy]

This is the History of Spring

1st Granite, 132

The prisoners of Bouldergloves are many.

I designate three areas for excavation, one atop the other. Middle layer is adjacent to Great Hall and will be viewing gallery.

Upper level has openings in floor and will be holding pen.

Lower level will be completed later in the season.

12th Granite, 132

Child Amost withdraws from society and claims a workshop. He gathers many items and begins work.

21st Granite, 132

Amost has finished his work. It is magnificent cabinet with decorated images on every face. One side shows dotcommunist's legendary adamantine shield, as crafted by Mrs. Magpie in Spring of 131. The other shows hated Vampire Queen Udil. We will place that side against the wall.

15th Slate, 132

How did this happen? Crundle is spotted in bedroom hallway. Did a dwarf release it from a cage? No matter. Titansound makes short work of it with his mace. Its corpse lies bloody in the doorway.

17th Slate, 132

The lower level is complete. I order The Fair Portals and The Staves of Influencing into the arena.

Civilian dwarves gather on the gallery.

I designate four goblins for dropping. Pieface does duty.

The carnage is almost instant. The drop stuns goblins, who are quickly cut to pieces by waiting dwarves.

Grotty Scutta stands in wrong place and receives takes goblin to the head. It is bad timing.

Other dwarves are also injured. It is not a succesful bout. Casualties are carried to hospital and I rethink my plans for live training exercises. Bouldergloves military is looking thin. I heave book of dwarves onto my desk (it is now a mighty tome) and consider recruiting. We will reorganise. All squads will be disbanded. We will form four new squads of melee dwarfs, each under command of one of our legends. All squads will be brought up to strength. Training schedules will be kept.

There are four squads, each named for the material of their armour stand in their training room. They are Granite, led by xes, Cobaltite led by Old Gergl, Mica, led by dotcommunist and Chert, led by frogwoman. I assign minimum training allocation of half strength, to allow for breaks and socialising. A happy dwarf is a strong dwarf.

7th Felsite, 132

Magneze comes to me with schocking news. Alcohol supplies are critically low. I check brewery and find no record of brewing orders. This is rectified immediately.

22nd Felsite, 132

Two kobold thieves are killed by Squads Chert and Mica. New recruits Upchuck, izz, madamv and Vintage Paw get first taste of blood.

24th Felsite, 132

For our star soldiers, I order axes of adamantine. xes, frogwoman and dotcommunist will lacerate all enemies.

moggy, legendary weaponsmith since 129, works his art.

 

[Crispy]

This is the History of Summer

12th Galena, 132

We have completed the Great Hall roof. Now the ceiling rises three tiles, and the sound of dwarves drinking and eating echoes correctly.

It has come to my attention that I may appoint one dwarf to the rank of Champion. They will be expert trainer, able to dispense wisdom to all squads regardless of ability. There are three reasonable candidates: xes, frogwoman and dotcommunist. dotcommunist. I decide by counting kills. They count as follows:

dotcommunist: nine notable kills, nine other kills
xes: fifteen notable kills including Izem the cyclops and uno the forgotten beast, three other kills
frogwoman: twenty two notable kills including Noloc the forgotten beast and three dragons, four other kills

Decision is easy. Frogwoman is Champion of Bouldergloves.

25th Galena, 132

Arena will be reopened, with improvement. Squad to train will wait in antechamber. Targets will be introduced. And only then will combat take place. No more death by falling goblin. Granite Squad is first.

Three trolls are selected. Truxta, Old Gergl and emanymanton swiftly drop them through trap doors. Some crossbowdwarves are in the gallery and take shots as they fall.

Combat is swift. J Ed, dervish and vixen gain notable experience. No injuries are sustained. I order round two. Goblins this time. Armed.

Combat is just as rapid. More recruits gain experience. The gallery is entertained.

 

[beesonthewhatnow]

*cough* Railway *cough*

 

[Crispy]

*cough* Railway *cough*

I have not forgotten you

 

[Crispy]

This is the History of Autumn

21st Limestone, 132

I think longingly of adamantine, but am frustrated by magma. I imagine the spires of it within magma's clutches. One day, we will harden it and dig out the precious metal. I plan for waterworks to deliver cooling.

28th Sandstone, 132

A new enemy of Bouldergloves arrises in the depths. I make no grand tactical plan. All soldiers muster in the caverns. Usan arrives.

It is over as soon as it starts. Usan is attacked from all sides and does not manage one counter attack. Geminisnake is credited with the kill, for her spear strike to the brain.

We heard tales of such beasts wiping out entire forts. We find them no threat. Bouldergloves has great luck or great strength. Either is welcome.

18th Timber, 132

The liaison and trade caravan have arrived. There is little we need to trade for, but welcome them anyway. They have traveled far and we are kin.

I meet with liaison to receive news. I enquire of the health of our vile vampire ruler. She continues to thrive. She knows of Bouldergloves now. Our efforts are legend. Such is our prosperity that Bouldergloves becomes duchy and I its Duke. Only the Queen ranks above me now.

Next, I receive most unsettling news. Queen Udil grows tired of capital city Sackwalk and considers reigning from other mountainhome. A small trade offering would convince her to choose Bouldergloves. We would be capital city of all the Bells of Thinning.

My first thought is to decline, for we are proudly independent. But my second thought is delicious thought. Yes, I tell him, yes we will make most generous offering to glorious Queen Udil and receive her with the hospitality that Bouldergloves is famous for. Long live the Queen.

 

[beesonthewhatnow]

 

[Maurice Picarda]

I'm surprised to find that I'm genuinely interested in seeing what happens next.

 

[Shippou-Sensei]

*sharpens stake*

 

[Crispy]

4th Moonstone, 132

While carrying gold ore to smelter, Shirl is gored by angry ghost. Foul spectre! I hurry order for memorial slab. The dead must rest.

5th Moonstone, 132

Shirl's wounds are too deep and she dies before reaching hospital. The dead must rest.

15th Moonstone, 132

I order construction of Royal Palace. Nothing but the finest rooms for Queen Udil the mighty. Grand causeway leads from central courtyard.

28th Moonstone, 132

Floor of throne room is of cobaltite and gold. It is also of blood, but that is unavoidable here. It suits her tastes.
12th Opal, 132

Royal Palace will also require furnishing. I set all forges to producing golden statues and furniture. It is important that QUeen Udil knows our history, so I set master engraver Poot to work.

She makes most satisfying choice of subject.

Yes, most satisfying indeed.

My satisfaction knows no bounds.

11th Obsidian, 132

Preparations for Queen Udil's arrival are interrupted by goblin attack. Five squads of sixteen melee goblins each. Two squads of trolls. Each squad is called to duty at its barracks. The Wires take up position on battlements. The forces of darkness approach, but we do not fear them.

The Wires are well positioned to harras invaders. First are trolls, who make usual mess of traps.

Next are swordsgoblins, but their leader is elite bowman. He halts his squad and fires back at The Wires. His aim is good enough to penetrate fortifications, and several dwarves are incapacitated. I order Chert and Mica squads out to bring him down.

But timing could not be worse. Full strength of invasion force is upon us and all dwarves rush into battle. There is no more time for tactics. It is all or nothing.

xes charges onto field and takes out elite bowman. It is only discernible detail from a battle that is hidden by clouds of blood and flying body parts. It is only over when last squad of swordsgoblins flee the battlefield.

We count six casualties: blairsh, feyr and Wouldbe are among them. The fourth is founding dwarf fractionMan, which now leaves five of original seven alive. Somehow, in the midst of the battle, a goblin sword found its way into the skull of xes, axe lord, sending him to death in an instant. But most painful loss is frogwoman, champion of Bouldergloves. No dwarf saw her fall, but there her body lies for all to see. To lose two such heroes of Bouldergloves and one of its founders on the same day is crippling blow to pride.

Many dwarves are taken to hospital. Maurice Picarda and emanymanton have their work cut out. I recruit lemontop, mwgdrwg and Greebo as nurses.

dotcommunist is now champion of Bouldergloves. I will order full set of adamantine armour for his personal use. We cannot lose another hero.

28th Obsidian, 132

This is end of sixth year of Bouldergloves. Its most transformative. We have gained highest recognition of our people and also suffered our greatest loss. But 133 will be year recorded in history. Gods willing, we will claim capital status and house Queen Udil, may she drink the blood of a hundred dwarves.

 

[Stigmata]

But timing could not be worse. Full strength of invasion force is upon us and all dwarves rush into battle. There is no more time for tactics. It is all or nothing.

This is the music in my head when I read this

 

[DotCommunist]

But most painful loss is frogwoman, champion of Bouldergloves. No dwarf saw her fall, but there her body lies for all to see

Nooooooooooooooo

dotcommunist is now champion of Bouldergloves. I will order full set of moggy's masterwork adamantine armour for his personal use. We cannot lose another hero

First my child and now my woman. There shall be vengeance!

 

[Shippou-Sensei]

you're so distressed your images have broken

 

[DotCommunist]

at least one of them works

 

[FridgeMagnet]

You should be able to launch retaliation raids on goblins in DF, really. Train up a hundred or so Axe Lords in the danger room, mine under their defences then sit back and watch limbs fly.

 

[Crispy]

This is the History of Spring

3rd Granite, 133

Royal palace progresses well. In order to correctly furnish it, tribute must be brought from the forges. But tribute is heavy and dwarves move slowly up staircase. To speed up delivery, we will build a railway. It is a complex business, requiring careful and precise designation of digging and carving of tracks. I designate track for elevation of 2 levels, to test design.

14th Granite, 133

Child Zas is held in grasp of creative urge. He assembles ingredients in adamantine workshop, far underground.

24th Granite, 133

tommers is first to test cart design. Impulse ramp should speed cart uphill in violation of natural law.

Natural law remains unviolated. Cart rolls back down ramp and narrowly misses tommers. We will try again.

26th Granite, 133

Zas makes a bracelet. Pretty bracelet.

28th Granite, 133

I identify track construction error and order another push. stuff_it gives minecart a shove and it heads up track.

This time, impulse works, but cart is stuck at top. Final connecting track must be carved.

2nd Slate, 133

beesonthewhatnow gives minecart push for the third time. Cart enters impulse ramp and spirals upward. We have elevated without the use of powered rollers. It is abuse of heretical physics, but it works.

Spoiler: What the?

This is an exploit, plain and simple. To get a cart to go uphill, you either have the dwarf push it, which is no faster than walking, or you have powered rollers, which need power from turbines, and a power transmission network, which also needs power. It's a colossal undertaking and quite frankly I cannot be bothered with building 50 levels of the fucking things. So instead, I'm abusing a bug where when a minecart derails onto an upwards ramp, it behaves as if it fell first, so accelerating it. This lets me build a 3x3 minecart elevator without any moving parts.

6th Slate, 133

We have two wells and 50 idle dwarves. Why did no dwarf bring this injured soldier water? Now we have lost a valuable archer.

24th Slate, 133

Reports of trumpet calls. The royal party has arrived! Welcome, Queen Udil. We are just preparing your quarters. Bear with us for a brief moment.

She brings with her expert soldiers. They may be her bodyguard, but they will make excellent replacements for lost heroes and squad leaders.

She makes the rounds. Children find her enthralling.

11th Felsite, 133

Udil is satisfied with all parts of Palace, but still finds quality of mausoleum wanting. She has good engraving skill, so I invite her to engrave her own tomb.

She has studied history of Bouldergloves well. Among her carvings are:

The fall of Migrurost, Searpent Woman
http://www.urban75.net/forums/threa...s-succession-game.309562/page-5#post-12286908

The most recent election of dotcommunist to role of champion

longdog's election to mayor in 130
http://www.urban75.net/forums/threa...s-succession-game.309562/page-6#post-12304963

My election as baron in the same year

Such expert engravings soon raise quality of mausoleum to royal status. Now Udil wants for nothing. But Bouldergloves' generosity overflows. I remove all labours from the Queen and allow her to relax in her palace. Soon, we will raise all tribute to her and lay it at her feet.

 

[Crispy]

This is the History of Summer

2nd Hematite, 133

Excitement of Queen's arrival has begun to fade and now I do not feel happy at all.

Many things bother me. My clothes are ruined. I order fresh clothes made. Criminals are unpunished. I elevate Kizmet to Captain of The Guard. He is very weak, quick to tire and clumsy. Any beatings he delivers will be inconsequential. I build a prison for internment.

4th Hematite, 133
Kizmet identifies four criminals. redsnapper and stavros are guilty of exporting prohibited items. SubZe0Cat produced a forbidden item. And dotcommunist, despite exalted position in Bouldergloves' history, is also guilty of violating export prohibition.

redsnapper is first to face justice. She is hauled away to jail. Her son Adil keeps her company.

11th Hematite, 133

It is like a torch is lit in my mind. For some unknown reason, I have not left my quarters in months. My clothes are in tatters and I have been eating raw dimple cups day in and out. I wake from my stupor and fetch an exceptional plump helmet stew and bring it to my dining hall. I walk under waterfaller and it lifts my heart.

Spoiler: I'm a moron

I'd been restricting Crispy to his quarters all this time. I can't even remember why. He had a food supply, but was unable to leave and meet with other dwarves, see the waterfall, and get himself new clothes. I've released him now, so he *should* cheer up. Fingers crossed I've realised in time. Don't want him going insane.

22nd Hematite, 133

Last goblin attack was damaging to dwarves and moral of entire fortress. While our attentions are diverted by the construction of tribute to Queen Udil, I decide to build closing door for South Gate. Brogdale goes to building site to lay out design. He feels a chill and sees ghost of frogwoman, hovering still and silent above the place where she fell.

It is due to idiotic burial procedures. If first dwarf to die cannot be buried, then other dwarves in queue will not be buried, regardless of pre-assigned tomb.

I build more coffins.

22nd Hematite, 133

Child Lor has responded well to the creative spirits. He is now legendary bone carver, but will not carve again until adulthood.

9th Galena, 133

It was inevitable. The Queen is always hungry and must feed. Her count is now one thousand two hundred sixty.

16th Galena, 133

The goblins have returned. This time, I have no taste for battle and make simple decision to close gates of Bouldergloves. We have more important tasks.

I raise the palm of my hand and apply it to my face. I built the wrong sort of bridge. Instead of raising up to form an impenetrable barrier, it has retracted into itself and disappeared. The South Gate, although trapped, is wide open.

I curse my mistake. Lookouts identify the invading force as very large, led by hammer and axe lords and sword and pike masters. Sixty four goblins and eight trolls.

Very well, Bouldergloves is ready to be tested.

Against first wave, traps do their work particularly well. Not one spear, pike or troll makes it through.

Second wave of pikegoblins is more agile and some make it through traps. Sihi is already in the fight, collapsing goblin skull with her steel mace. They are led by Amxu, Goblin Axe Lord, a dangerous opponent. But we have strength in numbers and axe lords of our own.

At first sign of massed charge, Amxu turns and flees, leading his pike squad away.

Crossbows arrive also, led by hammer lord Ngokang. Sihi engages him in combat amongst the spinning traps, where his supreme agility lets him dance between all attacks.

He dances free into courtyard, where army of Bouldergloves comes to greet him. Bembul, legendary axe dwarf of the Queen's retinue, leads the charge.

But Ngokank's own agility is his downfall. Dodging Dervish's mace swing, he dodges into a cage trap and is prevented from further dancing.

dotcommunist performs his duties with usual panache.

He meets goblins punch with his own punch, shattering bone.

The fight goes well and goblins are crushed sliced and dismembered. Three lashers chase Liberty to the South. She parries and blocks well, but they are too numerous and eventually overwhelm.

Revenge is quick and army swarms remaining lashers. She is only casualty.

 

[Bob_the_lost]

What of me oh mighty hermit leader? How do i serve you, do my children still live?