Rees-Mogg's "rules"

[a_chap]

ITV News exclusive: Jacob Rees-Mogg issues style guide to staff

Style rules:

• Organisations are SINGULAR
• All non-titled males — Esq.
• There is no . after Miss or Ms
• M.P.s — no need to write M.P. after their name in body of text
• Male M.P.s (non-privy councillors) — in the address they should have Esq., before M.P. (e.g. Tobias Ellwood, Esq., M.P.)
• Double space after fullstops
• No comma after 'and'
• CHECK your work
• Use imperial measurements


Banned-words/phrases:

• Very
• Due to
• Ongoing
• Hopefully
• Unacceptable
• Equal
• Too many 'I's
• Yourself
• Lot
• Got
• Speculate
• 'invest' (in schools etc)
• No longer fit for purpose
• I am pleased to learn
• Meet with
• Ascertain
• Disappointment
• I note/ understand your concerns


Clearly some rules are Good (e.g. no full stop after Miss/Ms) and some are barking mad (e.g. "Use imperial measurements")

Some of the banned words/phrases appear to be driven by a desire for plain English ("meet with", "ascertain", etc.) but without context it's difficult to ascertain (ha ha, just joking) to know why "lot", "got", "very", etc. are included.

Whatever your view of the top-hatted one I am pleased to learn of the insistence on (naughty! "I think it is good he insists on") checking your work.

Also "Organisations should be SINGULAR" brings joy to my heart. It boils my piss when I hear (or read) that "The
Football Association are going to stop being homophobic". There is only one Football Association! It should be
"The Football Association is going to stop being homophobic".

What are your views? (apart from him being a swivel-eyed loon)

 

[SpookyFrank]

ITV News exclusive: Jacob Rees-Mogg issues style guide to staff

Style rules:

• Organisations are SINGULAR
• All non-titled males — Esq.
• There is no . after Miss or Ms
• M.P.s — no need to write M.P. after their name in body of text
• Male M.P.s (non-privy councillors) — in the address they should have Esq., before M.P. (e.g. Tobias Ellwood, Esq., M.P.)
• Double space after fullstops
• No comma after 'and'
• CHECK your work
• Use imperial measurements


Banned-words/phrases:

• Very
• Due to
• Ongoing
• Hopefully
• Unacceptable
• Equal
• Too many 'I's
• Yourself
• Lot
• Got
• Speculate
• 'invest' (in schools etc)
• No longer fit for purpose
• I am pleased to learn
• Meet with
• Ascertain
• Disappointment
• I note/ understand your concerns


Clearly some rules are Good (e.g. no full stop after Miss/Ms) and some are barking mad (e.g. "Use imperial measurements")

Some of the banned words/phrases appear to be driven by a desire for plain English ("meet with", "ascertain", etc.) but without context it's difficult to ascertain (ha ha, just joking) to know why "lot", "got", "very", etc. are included.

Whatever your view of the top-hatted one I am pleased to learn of the insistence on (naughty! "I think it is good he insists on") checking your work.

Also "Organisations should be SINGULAR" brings joy to my heart. It boils my piss when I hear (or read) that "The
Football Association are going to stop being homophobic". There is only one Football Association! It should be
"The Football Association is going to stop being homophobic".

What are your views? (apart from him being a swivel-eyed loon)

The content is irrelevant, the purpose of this is to excercise arbitrary power.

 

[a_chap]

The content is irrelevant, the purpose of this is to excercise arbitrary power.

A given.

But I was kind of hoping people might also discuss the content.

 

[SpookyFrank]

And the only sane rule with Oxford commas is to use them or not as appropriate in context. There are many cases where it removes ambiguity.

 

[SpookyFrank]

A given.

But I was kind of hoping people might also discuss the content.

'Full stop' is two words for a start.

 

[Supine]

Imperial measurements is just plain swivel eyed lunacy. Unless we are talking about pints obviously.

 

[Pickman's model]

ITV News exclusive: Jacob Rees-Mogg issues style guide to staff

Style rules:

• Organisations are SINGULAR
• All non-titled males — Esq.
• There is no . after Miss or Ms
• M.P.s — no need to write M.P. after their name in body of text
• Male M.P.s (non-privy councillors) — in the address they should have Esq., before M.P. (e.g. Tobias Ellwood, Esq., M.P.)
• Double space after fullstops
• No comma after 'and'
• CHECK your work
• Use imperial measurements


Banned-words/phrases:

• Very
• Due to
• Ongoing
• Hopefully
• Unacceptable
• Equal
• Too many 'I's
• Yourself
• Lot
• Got
• Speculate
• 'invest' (in schools etc)
• No longer fit for purpose
• I am pleased to learn
• Meet with
• Ascertain
• Disappointment
• I note/ understand your concerns


Clearly some rules are Good (e.g. no full stop after Miss/Ms) and some are barking mad (e.g. "Use imperial measurements")

Some of the banned words/phrases appear to be driven by a desire for plain English ("meet with", "ascertain", etc.) but without context it's difficult to ascertain (ha ha, just joking) to know why "lot", "got", "very", etc. are included.

Whatever your view of the top-hatted one I am pleased to learn of the insistence on (naughty! "I think it is good he insists on") checking your work.

Also "Organisations should be SINGULAR" brings joy to my heart. It boils my piss when I hear (or read) that "The
Football Association are going to stop being homophobic". There is only one Football Association! It should be
"The Football Association is going to stop being homophobic".

What are your views? (apart from him being a swivel-eyed loon)

So we should say litres instead of pints or gallons and kilometres instead of miles? Rods, pecks, even furlongs - yes, archaic. But your blanket obvs imperial units are barking is itself barking.

Tbh the gist of his rules actually sensible. But it's patronising and condescending to impose these as a diktat esp when he's just arrived. But 117.5 days...

 

[farmerbarleymow]

• Double space after fullstops

Agree totally. I have to resist the temptation to rewrite stuff colleagues have wrote wrongly.

• Equal

Very telling, and not in the least bit surprising.

• Speculate

Surprising, given his history.

• No longer fit for purpose

Would rather not have staff describe the boss in such terms.

• Disappointment

Indeed, don't we all feel that. Along with horror and embarrassment that that fuckwit has a public office.

 

[farmerbarleymow]

Imperial measurements is just plain swivel eyed lunacy. Unless we are talking about pints obviously.

Why though? Imperial measurements are OK, and useful.

I use both tbf, interchangeably.

 

[Proper Tidy]

Agree on singular organisations and tbf I mostly use imperial measures. Apart from that it's shit. Can't stand double spacing, nobody uses typewriters any more so why bother ffs, also don't like using full stops in initials so MP not M.P. and esquire, fuck off. Some of his banned words are sound and useful, what's wrong with ongoing the knob

 

[farmerbarleymow]

What the fuck is rees-smeg anyway - minister for monocled cunts?

The news is so fucking depressing I've tried to ignore it.

 

[andysays]

Although some of the rules are arguably quite sensible, the overall impression I get from them, and from the fact that his first action as Leader of the House is to impose them on his staff, is that he's a petty dictator with a tenuous grip on the importance of such things.

No great surprise, in other words

 

[skyscraper101]

Less than 100 days til Brexshit and this is top of his agenda

“CHECK your work”

Fuck off you very creepy teachery not fit for purpose, cunt.

 

[Supine]

This sums it up

 

[stavros]

What would the punishment be for transgressions by staff, if indeed there is one?

 

[19sixtysix]

11 pence 3 farthings short of the shilling

 

[skyscraper101]

He’ll send his nanny over

 

[Yossarian]

I am pleased to learn that due to the ongoing concerns with the very disappointing Jacob Rees-Mogg MP, the revolutionary committee have ascertained that he is no longer fit for purpose. They have got a lot of other things to deal with but I can hopefully speculate that they will choose to invest in a couple of meters of rope or, equally good, set up an appointment with Ms. Guillotine.

 

[SpookyFrank]

What would the punishment be for transgressions by staff, if indeed there is one?

An invite to Moggy's christmas party.

 

[weltweit]

There are some people I would be happy not to see anymore, or hear, Rees Mogg is definitely on the list.

 

[farmerbarleymow]

There are some people I would be happy not to see anymore, or hear, Rees Mogg is definitely on the list.

Frankly, I wish he'd drop dead, the odious cunt.

 

[weltweit]

I was amazed he won his seat.

I am not sure what it says about North Somerset that they elected him, but I would have thought he could only appeal to a minority anywhere in the West Country. Shows what I know.

 

[Fez909]

Shame that 'optics' isn't one of the banned words

 

[ItWillNeverWork]

Well I like it

 

[a_chap]

What would the punishment be for transgressions by staff, if indeed there is one?

At work I made sure everyone in my team went on a basic one-day course run by the Campaign for Plain English.

Subsequent to their attending the course transgressions merely involved public humiliation.

 

[Pickman's model]

Shame that 'optics' isn't one of the banned words

Should never be used unless in a pubs or physics context

 

[JuanTwoThree]

The silly fuckwit thought this was a priority. That's the story.

 

[Pickman's model]

There are some people I would be happy not to see anymore, or hear, Rees Mogg is definitely on the list.

I think his whimperings, declining over the days he is locked in an oubliette without food or drink, would be something to enjoy

 

[agricola]

I think his whimperings, declining over the days he is locked in an oubliette without food or drink, would be something to enjoy

He'd relish being imprisoned in an oubliette though; better to call it an 'ole.

 

[Pickman's model]

He'd relish being imprisoned in an oubliette though; better to call it an 'ole.

The estate agent called it an oubliette but it's little more than a really deep sub-cellar