I see the "others" or the "out-group" being the "lads lads lads lager lager" MALE culture of racism, bullying, rape and selfish greed which is an attempt to compensate for their inability to express their emotions properly. And yes, it is all the same types. You find them in every town, usually in the pubs festooned with St George flags.I would advise a short break from this thread to think.
Your post above uses a classic mechanism directly related to racism i.e. you see others in an “out-group” as being very similar (“cultivating a personality is too much like hard work”) and your “in-group” as being diverse.
The "in-group" are of course the people such as those here, open minded and who enjoy the nicer things in life, festivals, music, relationships, inclusivity and art and trying to make the world a more fair and socially just place for all.
I see no problem in the "in-group" refusing to have the "out-group" spoil it for them. It's always been like this. And by sword or semtex, it always will be.