How to eat salad leaves and not look like Ed Milliband?

[Fez909]

I've started eating a lot more leaves but I don't know how to avoid getting salad dressing all over my face. Is this a common problem or am I just as awkward as the former Labour leader?

Leaves don't seem suited to forking, and chopping them up for scooping feels strange and ruins the presentation of my dinner.

Tips/advice pls

 

[krtek a houby]

Sod the presentation. Chop them up or juice them.

Or retreat to a corner and face away from other diners.

 

[DotCommunist]

pitta bread. Salad in pitta bread. Jobs a goodun. Other bready options are available

 

[Orang Utan]

This is why I eat alone

 

[DotCommunist]

This is why I eat alone

 

[Sue]

I've started eating a lot more leaves but I don't know how to avoid getting salad dressing all over my face. Is this a common problem or am I just as awkward as the former Labour leader?

Leaves don't seem suited to forking, and chopping them up for scooping feels strange and ruins the presentation of my dinner.

Tips/advice pls

Yes. Sorry.

 

[Orang Utan]

I just force them in whole fwiw

 

[bi0boy]

Pick them up with your fingers, fold them into a suitable contained arrangement, and then place them in your mouth.

 

[Sue]

Stop eating salad leaves?

 

[Thimble Queen]

What dressing do you use? It's only a problem if it's off white

 

[Fez909]

pitta bread. Salad in pitta bread. Jobs a goodun. Other bready options are available

I don't 'do' bread anymore. Hence the leaves

What dressing do you use? It's only a problem if it's off white

Mayo/olive oil/spicy sauce

 

[Thimble Queen]

I don't 'do' bread anymore. Hence the leaves

Mayo/olive oil/spicy sauce

I only have oil and vinegar on mine and keep a napkin handy. Smaller mouthfuls maybe?

Eta you've cut bread out completely???

I'm eating a lot of no cook stuff atm. Like carrots, sweet peppers, salad etc. I've just bought some well fit looking strawberries. Also rice cakes, veggie pate and the like. I'm not intentionally cutting down on bread but its happening.

 

[Fez909]

I only have oil and vinegar on mine and keep a napkin handy. Smaller mouthfuls maybe?

Eta you've cut bread out completely???

I'm eating a lot of no cook stuff atm. Like carrots, sweet peppers, salad etc. I've just bought some well fit looking strawberries. Also rice cakes, veggie pate and the like. I'm not intentionally cutting down on bread but its happening.

Pretty much. No bread, no rice, no pasta, no spuds. At least when I'm eating alone or at work. Bread's now a treat or when I'm eating out with friends etc.

I keep the napkin handy at all times It's a bit annoying being a bearded one, though. Napkin + beard = only mostly clean face

 

[Thimble Queen]

Pretty much. No bread, no rice, no pasta, no spuds. At least when I'm eating alone or at work. Bread's now a treat or when I'm eating out with friends etc.

I keep the napkin handy at all times It's a bit annoying being a bearded one, though. Napkin + beard = only mostly clean face

Beard aka convenient leftovers receptacle in the style of Mr Twit

 

[Fez909]

Beard aka convenient leftovers receptacle in the style of Mr Twit

Next thread: how to eat fish with a beard without looking like Mr Twit

 

[DotCommunist]

maybe mush them together and roll a cigar of leaf out of them. then eat it like a bar of health

 

[Reno]

You tear the leaves to a size where it fits into your mouth. Should be obvious, really.

Also, when you have steak, don't serve the entire cow !

 

[maomao]

Eat rocket. The leaves are littler.