Help me write a response to an email, it's a bit sexist (construction industry) ..

[Poot]

Fucking hell

This guy did it completely accidentally. You want to do it on purpose out of some kind of silly revenge.

That's gonna help.

Actually I'd have gone with Lizzieloo's response, as I said.

But no, it's not a kind of 'silly revenge' when it happens every day and you have to address it. It's boring. And tedious. And makes you feel small. But your opinion and your advice is not needed unless, as has been pointed out, you have tits and work on a building site.

 

[Spymaster]

Actually I'd have gone with Lizzieloo's response, as I said.

But no, it's not a kind of 'silly revenge' when it happens every day and you have to address it. It's boring. And tedious. And makes you feel small.

This is not a case of a bloke being an out-and-out pig. It's a silly mistake that he's rectified with a massive apology and a side-helping of mortified embarrassment. Anyone wanting to make more out of this is absolutely out for silly revenge and probably doing more harm than good.

But your opinion and your advice is not needed unless, as has been pointed out, you have tits and work on a building site.

Cheers, I didn't realise this was a women only thread but the only advice I've given was for Liz to do exactly what she did, which has proved impeccable, and which you seem to agree with above.

 

[Sue]

Well that's unfortunate but still no reason to take the nuclear option straight off the bat.

But also a chance that he'll immediately see the error of his ways and apologise, as has happened here. Why go for the "withering putdown" or sarcastic response (which will almost certainly be held against you) without first finding out?

Which is why I suggested the 'quiet word' approach upthread. It's really bloody tedious though.

 

[Poot]

This is not a case of a bloke being an out-and-out pig. It's a silly mistake that he's rectified with a massive apology and a side-helping of mortified embarrassment. Anyone wanting to make more out of this is absolutely out for silly revenge and probably doing more harm than good.

Cheers, I didn't realise this was a women only thread but the only advice I've given was for Liz to do exactly what she did, which has proved impeccable, and which you seem to agree with above.

Jesus Christ, the next time it happens I'll be sure to ask your advice about how to handle it! Only been doing it for fifteen years!

 

[Sue]

Bet you're probably one of those humourless feminists, making a mountain out of a molehill...

Oh ffs

Oh I've heard that (and much worse) when I've gone for the 'quiet word' approach. So yes, FFS indeed.

 

[Spymaster]

Jesus Christ, the next time it happens I'll be sure to ask your advice about how to handle it ...

Well since you have agreed with my advice in this case, that may not be a bad idea. I'll be happy to help.

 

[equationgirl]

It does get wearing dealing with this repeatedly, being addressed by the wrong gender, having to correct men because they assumed yet again that women don't do technical work, putting up with the 'just joking' or 'don't be silly' comments literally for years on end.

Some days you just don't have the energy to do it again.

 

[Poot]

Well since you have agreed with my advice in this case, that may not be a bad idea. I'll be happy to help.

Seriously, it's a lovely day, go for a walk or bake a cake or something.

 

[Spymaster]

Seriously, it's a lovely day, go for a walk or bake a cake or something.

I am out

 

[WouldBe]

Yes. Never make a man feel uncomfortable if he makes you feel uncomfortable. That would be wrong. For some reason.

A swift kick in the nackers will do that and save all the angst. Unfortunately you may not keep your job but he'll Def think twice about it next time.

 

[WouldBe]

You've never been someone that has worked regularly on a building site with a pair of tits have you?

I've actually been told I shouldn't be there.

The attitude Sue pointed out is used regularly to belittle women that stand up for themselves, usually behind their backs.

 

[lizzieloo]

No it shouldn't. But how is the "withering putdown" a better option?

Your measured response has achieved precisely what you wanted without creating ill feeling, and at the same time maintaining whatever harmony existed previously. That's how to handle unpleasant situations.

The withering reply is where I'd go on site when some dick has made a comment to me that asked for a withering reply.

Not necessary in this situation.

 

[A380]

I just start all work e-mails with|:

Comrades.

 

[Spymaster]

I just start all work e-mails with|:

Comrades.

I usually go with:

Waaaaaankeeeeeers

 

[lizzieloo]

I'm furloughed so I have no idea how we're being addressed any more.

 

[equationgirl]

I'm furloughed so I have no idea how we're being addressed any more.

Dear The Colleague Formerly Known As?

 

[lizzieloo]

Dear The Colleague Formerly Known As?

"Dear lazy oaf" should do it ATM

 

[equationgirl]

"Dear lazy oaf" should do it ATM

Well you're furloughed, on lockdown, it's not like you can do much else.

 

[lizzieloo]

Well you're furloughed, on lockdown, it's not like you can do much else.

Good answer

 

[Humberto]

needs a 'riposte'

 

[lizzieloo]

It's not bad news Sue, I'm zero hours so I was just expecting to not get any work for the foreseeable, therefore no money.

I'll be getting an average of last year's wages, last year I had more work than I was getting this year.

 

[Sue]

It's not bad news Sue, I'm zero hours so I was just expecting to not get any work for the foreseeable, therefore no money.

I'll be getting an average of last year's wages, last year I had more work than this year.

Good to hear. That bloke's still annoying me on your behalf though . x

 

[lizzieloo]

Good to hear. That bloke's still annoying me on your behalf though . x

He's made a couple of spectacular fuck ups this week, one meaning no one could do any work for a day and a half (he tried to do IT) and the second meant that a surveyor who had travelled 3 hours to site couldn't do his work so had to turn round and go home.

I've actually been feeling sorry for him.

 

[Sue]

I'm pissed and been dealing with annoying work shit all week so all I can say is that you're a better person than I am!

(Loving the trying to do IT thing. )

 

[donkyboy]

When some of us send emails to our group which is predominately male (7 with only one female in the team) we start the email with "Ladies." Everyone gets its a joke. You could do the same when you send an email?

 

[two sheds]

Don't think that would work now, would just come across as sarky and aimed at the original sender.

 

[bmd]

Dear X,

Gents is a funny old word, isn't it? It has a couple of meanings. One is men, the other isn't women.

Curtsey,

You x