Alan Partridge: The Movie

[neonwilderness]

There's no point finishing the sentence, Lynn, because I am not driving a Mini-Metro

 

[Firky]

You know if King Arthur had an extending table it would have been a very different story. Well it wouldn't have been round.

 

[Firky]

Flushed on the first yank!

 

[Stigmata]

Feels more Coogan than Partridge, this one

 

[joustmaster]

lynne, I've got my foot impaled on a spike

After she tells him to pull it off in one go, he replies "all the blood will run out, you old mess."

 

[Gingerman]

Do you know what this bathroom says to me? Aqua. Which is French for water. It's like being inside an enormous Fox's Glacier Mint. Which, again, to me is a bonus

This chemical toilet is a Saniflow 33, now this little babe can cope with anything, and I mean anything. Earlier on I put in a pound of mashed up Dundee cake, let's take a look...not a trace! Peace of mind I'm sure, especially if you have elderly relatives on board.

Guide dogs for the blind. It's cruel really, isn't it? Getting a dog to lead a man round all day. Not fair on either of them

If you see a lovely field with a family having a picnic, and a nice pond in it, you fill in the pond with concrete, you plow the family into the soil, you blow up the tree, and use the leaves to make a dress for your wife who is also your brother

Sunday Bloody Sunday. What a great song. It really encapsulates the frustration of a Sunday, doesn't it? You wake up in the morning, you've got to read all the Sunday papers, the kids are running round, you've got to mow the lawn, wash the car, and you just think 'Sunday, bloody Sunday!

 

[Firky]

Sunday Bloody Sunday. What a great song. It really encapsulates the frustration of a Sunday, doesn't it? You wake up in the morning, you've got to read all the Sunday papers, the kids are running round, you've got to mow the lawn, wash the car, and you just think 'Sunday, bloody Sunday!

 

[joustmaster]

Has anyone ever ordered a round of lady boys?

 

[Firky]

I Am sorry, Michael, that was just noise.

 

[eatmorecheese]

Please don't do that, lieutenant colonel Kojak slap-head the third...

 

[eatmorecheese]

I don't want to alarm you Lynn, but I HAVE popped out again...

 

[Gingerman]

Big Yellow Taxi there by Joni Mitchell, a song in which she complains that they 'paved paradise to put up a parking lot' - a measure which actually would have alleviated traffic congestion on the outskirts of paradise. Something which Joni singularly fails to point out, perhaps because it doesn't quite fit in with her blinkered view of the world. Nevertheless, nice song.

 

[Gingerman]

I don't want to alarm you Lynn, but I HAVE popped out again...

That wasn’t deliberate, I promise you. It’s not a cry for help. I’ve had these shorts since 1982. They did have an underpant lining, but it’s perished. They’ve taken a bit of a pounding over the years.

 

[Favelado]

"Seve Ballesteros. The Bullfighter, that's what I call him although, er, technically he's a professional golfer. Friend of mine said recently, "What do you get if you cross a ballerina with a bastard?" "Ballesteros!" was his answer. I guess, if you analyse it, that Seve combines the qualities of both those animals. He has the lithe sophistication and nimbleness of a ballerina, combined with the hard-nosed, ruthless thuggery of a bastard."

 

[MillwallShoes]

I Am sorry, Michael, that was just noise.

love it when michael then repeats himself and partridge just says, "what?" with a frown on his face ha ha

 

[neonwilderness]

I've got a scam going on with a 12 inch plate

 

[MillwallShoes]

I'M LEAVING YOU YOU COW

 

[Gingerman]

I've got a scam going on with a 12 inch plate

 

[Firky]

love it when michael then repeats himself and partridge just says, "what?" with a frown on his face ha ha

I used to get a lot of that myself when I lived down south. Took me a bit to cotton on they were aping Alan Partridge

 

[Stigmata]

If you are gay, please remember, 'rubber up'.

 

[danski]

hmm, I get that one quite a bit

 

[xenon]

Dan! Dan! Dan!

 

[xenon]

Anyone listened to the I Partrridge audiobook? Read in character.

 

[Firky]

Anyone listened to the I Partrridge audiobook? Read in character.

No but it is going on the DL list.

 

[xenon]

No but it is going on the DL list.

Starts off slow and obviously a bit contrived as it's filling in his back story. But as it goes on you get stuff like him giving his perspective on incidents we've seen in the TV shows, it has more comic impact.

That's just basic.

 

[Gingerman]

Wings...They're only the band the Beatles could have been.

Lynn's a good worker, but she's a bit like Bert Reynolds. Very reliable, but she's got a moustache. Bit like ladyboys. Looks like a woman, but really it's a man. I mean, I don't find them attractive, just confusing

There is a schoolboy humour that surrounds bodily functions and I don't think there should be. I am very happy to say that I try to maintain a healthy anus. I am largely successful. There is the odd mishap but the law of averages is you are not going to get it right every time.

God created Adam and Eve. He didn't create Adam and Steve

 

[Gingerman]

Lynn I've pierced me foot on a SPAIIIIIIEEEEEEEEKE

 

[MillwallShoes]

I'll be your friend.

 

[Ted Striker]

Sunday bloody sunday

 

[spanglechick]

Written by Steve Coogan and Armando Iannucci, should be good. First heard rumours of this about 10 years ago but now it is actually being made.

It could be great.

Wonder if they'll pitch it to the US market like Borat? Coogan has some profile...