“If you want a lot of chocolate on your biscuit . . .

[Silas Loom]

….join our club!”

The memorable line from an advert for Jacob’s club biscuits, of course. But to the tune of Paranoid, by Black Sabbath.

Despite the lack of any evidence for this cover version, I’m pretty sure it was recorded by someone or other, possibly as a commercial release, and that it was on a housemate’s compilation tape.

Anyone else recall this existing?

 

[blairsh]

like

 

[maomao]

….join our club!”

The memorable line from an advert for Jacob’s club biscuits, of course. But to the tune of Paranoid, by Black Sabbath.

Despite the lack of any evidence for this cover version, I’m pretty sure it was recorded by someone or other, possibly as a commercial release, and that it was on a housemate’s compilation tape.

Anyone else recall this existing?

Sounds like something Snuff would have done (though I have no idea). What was the second line or did it just keep repeating? It does have the right number of syllables though. You might have just dreamed it though.

 

[Silas Loom]

Sounds like something Snuff would have done. What was the second line or did it just keep repeating? It does have the right number of syllables though. You might have just dreamed it though.

IIRC it just repeated. Like the ad.

I don’t think I dreamed it. I had an earworm for a while years and years ago of Wake/FALAA-era Sisters doing a lugubrious cover of Nellie the Elephant, but I still knew it was a hallucination. This presents as a genuine memory of a compilation tape.

 

[Kevbad the Bad]

I used to give blood for many years. I always looked forward to the club biscuits at the end. I always took two.

 

[Silas Loom]

like

Need. Crave. Whatever.

 

[blairsh]

Need. Crave. Whatever.

"want"...

 

[Silas Loom]

"want"...

A very minor failure in recall. It doesn’t cast any doubt on the memory itself.

 

[DaveCinzano]

...and with that tiny crack in the witness' recollection, the entire case collapsed amidst howling from the gallery and an angry tattoo from the judge's gavel...

 

[DotCommunist]

Not as good as the Treo song.

 

[DaveCinzano]

Not as good as the Treo song.

Trio

 

[Happy Tree]

The best confectionery advert song was Fry's Turkish Delight. Full of Eastern promise.

 

[pbsmooth]

“If you like Leeds United then you must be fucking scum… scum!” Is the version I remember

 

[Silas Loom]

“If you like Leeds United then you must be fucking scum… scum!” Is the version I remember

The scansion there is terrible, though, compared with the Club version, which is absolutely spot on.

Only works if there is a missed beat before Leeds. Is that how it goes?

 

[Ax^]

not what your looking for but



first thing that came to mind

 

[pbsmooth]

The scansion there is terrible, though, compared with the Club version, which is absolutely spot on.

Only works if there is a missed beat before Leeds. Is that how it goes?

If you liiiike Leeds United… scans fine with a long like!

 

[Silas Loom]

If you liiiike Leeds United… scans fine with a long like!

Fine by me. Don’t want one of those arguments about meter in football chanting which end with someone giving it the big iamb.

 

[maomao]

Fine by me. Don’t want one of those arguments about meter in football chanting which end with someone giving it the big iamb.

It only scans that way if it's a trochee match.

 

[Silas Loom]

It only scans that way if it's a trochee match.

Yep, if you follow Leeds United would work.

 

[Happy Tree]

Screeching into this tangent, I would just like to ask where these football chants come from. Who makes them up? How? When? How do they tell the fans about their new song? Do they get it in the club newsletter or something? Do they have choir practice? How does this meme propagate?

Ooh, ahh, Cantona

 

[Silas Loom]

If you like a lot of screeching into tangents chant for clubs. It’s probably all driven by TikTok these days.

 

[pbsmooth]

Screeching into this tangent, I would just like to ask where these football chants come from. Who makes them up? How? When? How do they tell the fans about their new song? Do they get it in the club newsletter or something? Do they have choir practice? How does this meme propagate?

Ooh, ahh, Cantona

Someone shouts it out in the stand, pub, on the train… or shares it in a fanzine, on a forum, maybe TikTok now

 

[Humberto]

Rocky Robin, the rock Geordie robin character selling chocolate biscuits to children in the good old days was an unimaginative rip-off of Rockin' Robin by the Jackson Five.

 

[Voley]

Sounds like something Snuff would have done (though I have no idea).

Snuff were the first thing that came to my mind too. This sort of thing:

 

[Voley]

Oh God, you've sent me down a rabbithole.

 

[Silas Loom]

The good thing is that if Snuff didn’t do it in the first place, they could probably, on that evidence, be persuaded to cover the cover.

 

[Voley]

We had Snuff on at Thames Poly while I was there. Wat Tyler and Axegrinder supported. Cellar bar, probably cost about three quid. Tepid, flat Fosters a quid a pint.

 

[PTK]

Fine by me. Don’t want one of those arguments about meter in football chanting which end with someone giving it the big iamb.

Very good!

 

[Happy Tree]

I'm sure we all remember chancing upon the Holy Grail of chocolate bicsuits: solid chocolate, no biscuit inside! I remember it happening with Kit Kats. Can't remember if Club ever did it but it probably happened.

My favourite was Breakaway. With the lined pattern on top, obvs. They really knew how to give you a nice chocolate border to bite off.

 

[Silas Loom]

I'm sure we all remember chancing upon the Holy Grail of chocolate bicsuits: solid chocolate, no biscuit inside! I remember it happening with Kit Kats. Can't remember if Club ever did it but it probably happened.

My favourite was Breakaway. With the lined pattern on top, obvs. They really knew how to give you a nice chocolate border to bite off.

Imagine that happening with a Viscount. Jackpot.