Worst film ever?

[kerb]

Fez, we're told certain films are "great", but that is never questioned. Why are they great? They're great because they're in some list? Or because some poncy critic says you should like them?

Well, to me a great film is a film I have enjoyed, and I didn't enjoy any of the films listed.

fair enough point mate. i happen to have enjoyed all those films you cited but that just taste ain't it.

its just seems that you dont have a very good one

if someone's views are based on channel 4 best film run downs that you have no opinion.

Worst film ever..? Jaz and Silent Bob Strike Back comes to mind

 

[kakuma]

fucking hell dub, you should be a soul singer, the amount of trouble that follows you round

 

[hiccup]

...

Worst film ever..? Jaz and Silent Bob Strike Back comes to mind

I walked out of that film, and I was watching it at home.

 

[kerb]

I walked out of that film, and I was watching it at home.

innit. i actually felt embarrassed for them all and my brother apologised for buying it for me. now thats bad

 

[8ball]

I've never walked out of a film.

Gladiator came close but everyone I was with loved it and there wasn't a pub nearby so I had a nap instead. Bloody loud bits kept waking me up

 

[Poi E]

Freddie Got Fingered has to be up there. Or down there, rather.

 

[The Boy]

I'm gong to have a proper think about this, but the first thig that came to mind was the Start Wars trilogy. Or the Bond movies.

Cannot fucking stand them.

 

[danny la rouge]

Fair point but I think if you're going to talk about the 'Worst fiilm ever', rather than 'Films I think are massively overrated', then I think an element of looking at how others respond to it comes into play.

In order to know which are the worst films ever, rather than the worst films I've seen, you'd need to have seen all the films ever made. And I haven't. Not even close. And neither have you.

Have you never listened to some music and thought 'well I can tell that there's something there, that it isn't just shit, but it really ain't my bag'?

Yes, of course. And I've seen films like that, too.

But not the ones I've listed; the ones I've listed are the Beatles of films. The Emperor's New Clothes of Films. People only think they like them because they know they're supposed to.

 

[danny la rouge]

I'm gong to have a proper think about this, but the first thig that came to mind was the Start Wars trilogy. Or the Bond movies.

Cannot fucking stand them.

Good man.

 

[kerb]

People only think they like them because they know they're supposed to.

but on the flipside you get people who dislike films because they know they are not meant to.

 

[8ball]

In order to know which are the worst films ever, rather than the worst films I've seen, you'd need to have seen all the films ever made. And I haven't. Not even close. And neither have you.

Umm . . ok. I haven't said anything that really contradicts that point, though.

. . . people only think they like them because they know they're supposed to.

So you don't think anyone really likes these films?
They just pretend to because the Guardian Film Guide told them to?
Fair enough, it's a bit of a 'pretentious elitist snob' attitude to have, though.

 

[fear-n-loathing]

highwaymen is complete toss. the only time i've nearly walked out of the cinema, well second, one hour photo is very shit too

 

[Idaho]

Difficult to know what's worse - overwrought pretention/overratedness, imaginationless adaptation/remake, or just plain shit.

The fifth element is in there somewhere. Peter Greenaway/David Lynch tortured nonsense will have a few offerings. 90% of V for Vendetta and Constantine too. And for the final catagory - has anyone had the misfortune to see the film Practical Magic?

 

[danny la rouge]

Umm . . ok. I haven't said anything that really contradicts that point, though.

Didn't say you did.

So you don't think anyone really likes these films?
They just pretend to because the Guardian Film Guide told them to?
Fair enough, it's a bit of a 'pretentious elitist snob' attitude to have, though.

Some people like them; people have different tastes, obviously. But a lot of people try to like them because they think they should. We've all done that. I tried to read Finnegan's Wake. For longer than I should have. But actually; it's rubbish.

And I think that's the opposite of a "pretentious elitist snob" attitude.

~~~​

What's your favourite film? Mine's Harvey, with Jimmy Stewart.

 

[Cid]

Imo for something to qualify as worst film ever it can't just be overated or something you don't like because it doesn't appeal to you... It has to have something outstandingly bad about it that might negate any possibility of it being 'so bad it's funny'. It has to have no redeeming features, ie shit cinematography, shit soundtrack, shit acting. A lot of films mentioned so far have been pretty dreadful imo, but to be truly bad a film must be universally villified, fit only for utter contempt. There is, after all, some very tough competition... For example I agree that American Beauty is shite, but it has a vaguely coherent (if pretty bad) storyline (unlike Battlefield Earth), Titanic is truly awful but has Leonardo DiCaprio dying in it (unlike Battlefield Earth), Star Wars III is absolutely dreadful with some of the worst scripting and editing ever (look at the fades between scenes) but it does have Yoda, and it's amusing watching Ewan McGregor being too bored to even bother trying to act (unlike Battlefield Earth). There is really no word that quite describes how awful that film is... Read The Groke's review.

 

[upsidedownwalrus]

Spawn is up there

Agreed. And I was really looking forward to it cos I liked the soundtrack.

Made Blade look like the best film ever.

Worst film for me in terms of huge disappointment: Phantom Menace
Worst film in terms of everyone saying how great it was: Shakespeare in Love

 

[upsidedownwalrus]

And as to films people like to be cool, I bring you: Pulp Fiction.

At the time it was out, everyone went on and on about how amazing it was. But when people are talking about films now, and their faves, this is rarely, if ever, mentioned.

 

[Idaho]

The Phantom Menace really was poor. Definately worthy of scorn.

 

[upsidedownwalrus]

I remember someone (I think Orang Utan) saying that complaining about Phantom Menace was like moaning that Police Academy 7 was shit. I (still) beg to differ. The original Star Wars films, whilst not exactly Shakespearian, were iconic, and had a certain charisma and chemistry about them. Phantom Menace was almost entirely lacking in anything like that.

I don't mind something being mindless. To me a bit of mindless art is just as worthwhile as a bit of 'high' art when it's done well: Raiders of the Lost Ark, Star Wars originals, Die Hard.

And I don't mind something being for kids: I love Toy Story, the Incredibles, even cheesy 80s films like Flight of the Navigator.

The Phantom Menace, though, managed the amazing feat of being both mindless and boring. They had this cool villain, Darth Maul, yet we hardly saw him at all. Half the film was taken up by people talking about tax blockades. The pod race took way too much of the film. Jar Jar Binks was just annoying, rather than funny.

Compare that with the original star wars film - the Cantina scene, Han Solo, Chewbacca, the Death Star destruction sequence - you can see that Phantom Menace was simply shit by comparison, it's not a matter of one always being crap in teh first place.

 

[Pie 1]

Paid to see: Ocean's 12.
Possibly the most pointless film ever. Walked out towards the end as I wanted to catch last orders.

 

[Flashman]

With the amount of drivel on offer from cinema history, some very odd choices being thrown up; "overrated" I grant you, but worst filums ever?

Some more:

Cool as Ice
Grease II
Barb Wire
Anaconda
Ishtar
Armageddon
Halloween III: Season of the Witch
Hudson Hawk
The Three Amigos

 

[felixthecat]

With the amount of drivel on offer from cinema history, some very odd choices being thrown up; "overrated" I grant you, but worst filums ever?

Some more:

Cool as Ice
Grease II
Barb Wire
Anaconda
Ishtar
Armageddon
Halloween III: Season of the Witch
Hudson Hawk
The Three Amigos

Now I thoroughly enjoyed Anaconda. It was so bad it was entertaining!

 

[Dirty Martini]

It's Boxing Helena, no question.

 

[Flashman]

I definitely subscribe to the so bad it's good philosophy, although there's no way I could sit through Armageddon again. I do like Deep Impact though which is similar.

 

[shakespearegirl]

I went to the premiere of Armagedon. Deciding in advance it was going to be utter tosh we got quite pissed and agreed the group of us would go in so our client saw us attend and then leave and go back to the bar. Unfortunately we were sat right in front of the client and had to stay for the entire awful film.

 

[upsidedownwalrus]

With the amount of drivel on offer from cinema history, some very odd choices being thrown up; "overrated" I grant you, but worst filums ever?

Some more:

Cool as Ice
Grease II
Barb Wire
Anaconda
Ishtar
Armageddon
Halloween III: Season of the Witch
Hudson Hawk
The Three Amigos

But personally I think it's much more interesting to look at the chronically overrated rather than films that everyone knew were poppycock in the first place.

 

[Flashman]

But this thread is about the worst films ever made, not the chronically overrated half-decent ones that have at least some merit.

The likes of Dr Strangelove being in such a thread is absurd, frankly.

 

[pk]

"Romeo Must Die" ranks as one of the most shite films I've seen for a while.

Went to see "Deep Water" ?? (the low budget one about the sharks and that scuba couple) and was so incredulous that any cunt could actually charge someone to see it, we walked out at the end and got a full refund!

 

[Yetman]

any steven seagal film

Nah, Under Siege (2?) has got Erika Elinacks enormous tits in it.

That automatically removes it from the 'worst' category to the 'would be worst but features a cracking pair of norks' category

I vote for that shit film with the dragons in that was out a few years back. Utter chod.

And Carry On films, I hate them too

 

[Louloubelle]

I'm a great fan of Broken Blossoms but I can't forgive Griffiths for this piece of filth

I hate the film more that I can say, partly because the specatcle, cinematography and direction are awesome and could have been used to make a great film. The representation of African Americans and the explicitly, viciously racist themes in the film that turn it into something horrific beyond belief. The film is used to this day to recruit people into the KKK to this day and I think it's important to see and understand as a piece of propoganda.

So I can't deny that the film is 'good' in some respects, you can't argue with the fact that it represented a milestone in cinema, however it's legacy is poison and I would like to think that Broken Blossoms was griffith's apology to the world for making such a viciously racist film.

Other films I hate, for their one dimensional, racist stereotypes

Raid on Entebbe

True Lies

Live and Let Die

And just for being a really, really crap film (although it's also about the 'secret occult powers' of native amaericans)
The Manitou