Help! 10 year old has spent loads of money on games and apps….

[beesonthewhatnow]

At the moment I have given him a factory reset iPad with about four things on it to make do with while I figure this out so it’s an upgrade from that

Dunno how far you’ve gone before with the Apple parental controls, but it is possible to lock things down completely, to the point where even installing an app requires confirmation on a linked device, no payments possible etc Apple have many faults but they way they’ve done the kid security stuff is pretty good.

 

[Manter]

Dunno how far you’ve gone before with the Apple parental controls, but it is possible to lock things down completely, to the point where even installing an app requires confirmation on a linked device, no payments possible etc Apple have many faults but they way they’ve done the kid security stuff is pretty good.

I have now set that up. And as long as he never gets his hands on any other device I have absolute control.

Sadly other devices and other people are variables

 

[Boris Sprinkler]

When I was 10 I signed up for Britannia music club. By post.
And records coming via the postman are kind of hard to conceal. And the red envelopes. I was shitting myself at the fake bailiff letters and tings.my stepdad let it continue until he eventually took the records they had sent, posted them back with a letter saying I was 10.
Humac on Gammel Mønt might be able to help, since they have apple certifications as part of their employment program. Failing that, there’s anymac who are danish apple specialists but they cater more to small to medium businesses.

 

[moochedit]

I don't think under 18's can agree to "contracts"? Maybe can be challenged on that point? (I'm not a lawyer though).

 

[Saul Goodman]

If the PayPal account is linked to a card, get in touch with the card issuer and initiate a chargeback for unauthorised use.

 

[Manter]

I don't think under 18's can agree to "contracts"? Maybe can be challenged on that point? (I'm not a lawyer though).

Def worth trying if there are any subscriptions. I think I caught all of those though

 

[cesare]

Def worth trying if there are any subscriptions. I think I caught all of those though

Have you looked at the new apps' ts and cs to see if you're liable for your child's unauthorised use?

 

[ATOMIC SUPLEX]

And once things have been settled.....or even now....set up paypal to require authentication via a text to your phone... so you will have to authenticate any Paypal purchase. Your lad will never be able to use it again for a purchase...ananywhere.

I have had terrible trouble with PayPal and security. Nothing has actually been nicked, but I asked for the password and two step notifications to always be used on every device. Somehow it keeps reverting and I find I'm not only logged in, but only 'one convenient click' from purchase (rather than double checking the details in a basket). I must have clicked on something? If so it's waaay too easy and easy to miss.

 

[moochedit]

I have had terrible trouble with PayPal and security. Nothing has actually been nicked, but I asked for the password and two step notifications to always be used on every device. Somehow it keeps reverting and I find I'm not only logged in, but only 'one convenient click' from purchase (rather than double checking the details in a basket). I must have clicked on something? If so it's waaay too easy and easy to miss.

I think there is a box you can tick when you use paypal that says to skip the 2 factor stuff on this device (not sure exact wording) which saves a cookie on your device so it doesn't request a code.

 

[two sheds]

It's not as if the companies have actually lost anything like a physical product that they've bought materials for.

 

[tommers]

I don't know what the rules are in Denmark but is there a 14 day cooling off period? And, if so, did you make the claim in that period?

 

[Saul Goodman]

I don't know what the rules are in Denmark but is there a 14 day cooling off period? And, if so, did you make the claim in that period?

I don't think that applies when you're buying pixels.

 

[tommers]

I don't think that applies when you're buying pixels.

I thought it applied for everything except pants and food.

 

[Aladdin]

I have had terrible trouble with PayPal and security. Nothing has actually been nicked, but I asked for the password and two step notifications to always be used on every device. Somehow it keeps reverting and I find I'm not only logged in, but only 'one convenient click' from purchase (rather than double checking the details in a basket). I must have clicked on something? If so it's waaay too easy and easy to miss.

That's odd...

I always get a text code.

( It can be annoying. )

 

[Riklet]

Maybe claim on your travel insurance or via credit card company if that's what you use to pay on Google Pay. Imo this is where you get great benefit to using a credit card for any online purchases when stuff like this happens.

Sounds very hard on you anyway and he will doubtlessly find it hard to understand fully why youre so stressed and upset so be patient with him.

 

[Boris Sprinkler]

Nah. Transfer it to chores. May as well convert it to preparation for wage slavery. Trust me, he will understand the system then.*
Read the small print small ones.
What I did. Was use a card for an account I kept nothing in. If my daughter wanted something she would ask and we would discuss. Then I’d transfer the amount she needed. As she got older she got the physical card. That way if lost or stolen or exchanged for xp the damage is minimal.

*This is taking the piss btw.

 

[ATOMIC SUPLEX]

That's odd...

I always get a text code.

( It can be annoying. )

I think it's been better lately. I think the problem was that there used to be a small box to tick to NOT switch off all the security (or something). Sure I would have to log in with a password and the two step, but the very next time I went I would be already happily logged in again as if I had never logged out. . . even if it was from a third party connecting to pay pal.

 

[pogofish]

I don't think under 18's can agree to "contracts"? Maybe can be challenged on that point? (I'm not a lawyer though).

That’s the letter of the law in the U.K./EU but it’s interpretation is a bit more flexible IRL.

A lot depends on how capable of understanding the nature of a contract the child is and for a 10yr old autistic, that is likely to be not a lot. Taking it to court will likely cost a lot more than the sum involved though.

Manter - do you have access to an equivalent of the UK’s small claims court or other forms of legal consumer resolution that won’t bankrupt you?

 

[existentialist]

My experience of quite a large proportion of children, neurotypical and otherwise, is that they rarely have much of a concept of money, certainly other people's money. Parents have bottomless pockets. It's hard not to get outraged by it, but when I think about it, I was only really beginning to get a handle on the idea of budgeting in my mid-20s, and I'm sure I am not unusual.

I used to get a bit irritated when my step-granddaughter would come around the shop with me demanding stuff, and wanting the latest iPhone for Christmas every bloody year . And then I realised that she really didn't have any idea of what the cost of an iPhone represented, and it wasn't outrageous greediness, so much as "I would like one of those".

I guess what I'm getting at is that any "punishment" (eg making him pay it back via labour) beyond the natural consequences of what he's done (which it sounds like he is now experiencing) would be pointless, and quite possibly counterproductive - can we assume that a neurodiverse 10 year old even has the capacity to begin to understand what he's done?

 

[trashpony]

Not really the same thing but E has set up subscriptions for many things (including prime) and only realised once he’s been charged. I got a load of money back from
Microsoft as he swore blind he hadn’t set up a Minecraft sub and then I found it on an email address he’d forgotten about. The latest is a photoshop subscription which he forgot to cancel within the 14 day free trial period so had to pay £100