Duvet cover hell.
- Thread starter 8ball
- Start date
Mrs Magpie
On a bit of break...
Well, I can, but I do find them a pain...I once fell over backwards putting on a duvet cover.
Mrs Magpie
On a bit of break...
I think the main problem I have, apart from short-arsery, is that my bedroom is so tiny, standing on the bed to do it just means things will get knocked over.
quimcunx
imprimeo, lamino, distribuo
Some goes go better than others. What I've found recently is because I don't stand on the bed the shaking out doesn't go that well so the cover is still partly inside out and I have to manually organise the duvet bottom corners and cover bottom corners then shake out again.
teuchter
je suis teuchter
Take shoes off if wearing shoes. Climb on bed. Bang head on lamp hanging over bed.
Oh yes they are, try doing a double duvet when your armspan's 5'0".
stuff_it
Too skool for cool
I need a machine to keep my duvet cover on once I've done it - the buttons don't seem to cut it and I end up with it sideways with one leg trapped inside.Fucking cunting hell!!!
Can't they just invent some kind of machine or something.
Stand on the bed.
Mrs Magpie
On a bit of break...
See post #34
And your armspan (holding the tape measure in the fingertips of both hands) is what?
quimcunx
imprimeo, lamino, distribuo
weltweit
Well-Known Member
No idea, but my trick is to start with the cover inside out laid over the duvet, go into the cover to the top corners, get two corners right - pull through - and then shake the whole thing over the stairs.
quimcunx
imprimeo, lamino, distribuo
Stand on the roof then. No need to take shoes off and you're not tall enough to bang your head on the sun or even a cloud.
teuchter
je suis teuchter
How to put a duvet cover on in 24 easy steps.
1) Take duvet cover out of laundry
2) Find that there are socks etc in various corners inside the duvet cover. Fish these out
3) Check whether or not duvet cover is inside out. Don't think so. Turn inside out.
4) Oh. It was inside out. Turn inside out again.
5) Lay duvet on bed. Is it the right way round? Does it matter? Are duvets square? No-one knows. Guess which way round.
6) Scrabble around inside duvet cover to find top corners. (Do with head inside duvet cover for extra confusion)
7) Match up with corners on duvet whilst half-inside the duvet cover. What if I'm matching up with side rather than top edge of duvet? Doubts about squareness/directionality of duvet return. Go for it anyway.
8) Frenzied shaking to turn cover back inside-in whilst trying to not let go of corners
9) Duvet cover has now turned itself sort of back the right way round but only half way down duvet. Let go of corners to remedy.
10) Previously aligned corners now out of alignment due to actions to remedy point (9)
11) Re-align corners.
12) Duvet is still sticking out bottom of duvet cover. Try to lift duvet high enough to shake down. Not really possible.
13) Stand on bed to complete (12)
14) Bang head on pendant lamp whilst carrying out (13)
15) Cursing and swearing
16) Duvet is now nearly inside cover but still sticking out bottom slightly
17) Repeat (12)-(15) with duvet they other way around
18) Re-align corners
19) Start doing up poppers along the bottom
20) [much time passes]
21) You have done it wrong somewhere along the line because when you get to the end there is one popper left over with no partner
22) Return to (19)
23) Realign corners yet again
24) Complain about process on internet forum
1) Take duvet cover out of laundry
2) Find that there are socks etc in various corners inside the duvet cover. Fish these out
3) Check whether or not duvet cover is inside out. Don't think so. Turn inside out.
4) Oh. It was inside out. Turn inside out again.
5) Lay duvet on bed. Is it the right way round? Does it matter? Are duvets square? No-one knows. Guess which way round.
6) Scrabble around inside duvet cover to find top corners. (Do with head inside duvet cover for extra confusion)
7) Match up with corners on duvet whilst half-inside the duvet cover. What if I'm matching up with side rather than top edge of duvet? Doubts about squareness/directionality of duvet return. Go for it anyway.
8) Frenzied shaking to turn cover back inside-in whilst trying to not let go of corners
9) Duvet cover has now turned itself sort of back the right way round but only half way down duvet. Let go of corners to remedy.
10) Previously aligned corners now out of alignment due to actions to remedy point (9)
11) Re-align corners.
12) Duvet is still sticking out bottom of duvet cover. Try to lift duvet high enough to shake down. Not really possible.
13) Stand on bed to complete (12)
14) Bang head on pendant lamp whilst carrying out (13)
15) Cursing and swearing
16) Duvet is now nearly inside cover but still sticking out bottom slightly
17) Repeat (12)-(15) with duvet they other way around
18) Re-align corners
19) Start doing up poppers along the bottom
20) [much time passes]
21) You have done it wrong somewhere along the line because when you get to the end there is one popper left over with no partner
22) Return to (19)
23) Realign corners yet again
24) Complain about process on internet forum
Do you work from home?
spanglechick
High Empress of Dressing Up
or, y'know, safety pins.Since this has been resurrected, thought I'd mention that I found some clips in a shop that you use to clip the corners of the duvet into the corners of the cover - cost about 2 quid and removes about 70% of the anguish.
8ball
Decolonise colons!
I'm a bloke, I don't know what a safety pin is.
Fez909
toilet expert
Handy tip: if you're 5 ft 10, your armspan is....*drum roll* 5 ft 10!
No need for tape or owt like that
1) The stairs are outside the flat.
2) Even when nobody's smoking or drinking on them you really wouldn't want your bedding touching them. *shudder*
kittyP
Pluviophile
I am about 5'7" and I find it difficult with a superking duvet.
Badgers is not allowed to get involved any more as I have never seen everything make him so angry
I can do it with the inside out over the head job but I fucking hate changing all the bedding. It makes me want to cry.
kittyP
Pluviophile
Our bedroom is tiny with a sloping roof. I bang my head just getting out of bed sometimes let alone standing on the fucking thing!!
quimcunx
imprimeo, lamino, distribuo
You forgot the stage where all the corners of the duvet are neatly in the corners of the cover but it turns out that the bottom left is in bottom right and bottom right is in bottom left with a massive lumpy 180 degree twist in the middle of the duvet.
Sapphireblue
Well-Known Member
i hate doing it as well. i struggle with it due to arm-span and king-size, but i won't usually let OH help as although he does it quickly he also does it haphazardly and tends to put it in side-ways and not bother to fix it so i have to do it anyway. even best efforts usually mean a section of cover without duvet inside it, we plan to get a replacement duvet soon as my mum sells them and i'm hoping a newer duvet will fit better!
i sometimes use hair clips to secure the corners and get OH to shake though, proper shaking is the only way to do it.
i sometimes use hair clips to secure the corners and get OH to shake though, proper shaking is the only way to do it.
teuchter
je suis teuchter
This sounds like a pretty good ruse for getting out of jobs you don't want to do.Badgers is not allowed to get involved any more as I have never seen everything make him so angry
teuchter
je suis teuchter
True. Make that stage 18a.
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