Cats the movie has some awesomely scathing reviews...

[donkyboy]

why waste time and money Cats when you have so much better available.

 

[Favelado]

Yes, only interested if the cats are anatomically and behaviourally correct, so if there's no arsehole-sporting or -licking, no sale

I'm getting on a bit, but for the right price, I'll certainly try and lick my arsehole for you.

 

[Mrs Miggins]

 

[equationgirl]

The stuff of nightmares Mrs Miggins .

 

[T & P]

Some people appear to like it, or even love it!

‘Can't believe the negative publicity’: your reviews of Cats

 

[equationgirl]

Some people appear to like it, or even love it!

‘Can't believe the negative publicity’: your reviews of Cats

Some people like tripe cooked in milk.

 

[purenarcotic]

I love musicals but never got the point of Cats. The original book of poems are good though, recommend reading them.

 

[Looby]

A confession. I went to see this on Saturday.

My bezzer suggested it and I was curious.

The CGI stuff didn’t bother me after a bit and I did enjoy it. The story was a bit flimsy but the cast were good and it was fun.

I don’t like the song Memories at all but Jennifer Hudson did give me goosebumps.

It’s not a classic or anything but it was a nice couple of hours. We went to a more expensive cinema so it cost me a fortune. £27 quid including parking and popcorn!

 

[Saffy]

Ouch Looby that is pricey.
I've still got every intention of going to see this.

 

[Manter]

The Daily Mail likes it, so it must be good:


“Moreover, I detect a strong whiff of metropolitan snobbery towards Lloyd Webber, one of the film's producers, who is so often and so unfairly belittled.
The truth, unpalatable to the liberal so-called intelligentsia, is that he's a genius, and a versatile one at that.”

Will Cats be the latest box office smash that the critics mauled? | Daily Mail Online

He predicted it will be a box office smash despite the critical mauling but according to early box office takings, it’s already flopped big time.

They just have such enormous chips on their shoulders. It must be *exhausting*

 

[Manter]

There's a thread on twitter about Starlight Express. I'd forgotten it existed! I've been in hysterics laughing. Basically how it's Cats, but on roller skates.

It's here...

That thread made me laugh so much

 

[Looby]

Ouch Looby that is pricey.
I've still got every intention of going to see this.

Isn’t it. We upgraded to premium seats so with my student discount it was 14 quid. Then £9 for a drink and some popcorn. I don’t go often or I’d take my own!

You should! I bumped into two other friends at the same showing. They didn’t love it. [emoji1]

 

[Orang Utan]

Never buy snacks or drinks at the cinema is the golden rule of cinema going

 

[Looby]

Never buy snacks or drinks at the cinema is the golden rule of cinema going

I know and if I went more often I’d stick to that but it was a treat.

 

[A380]

I hate musicals. But I actually quite liked this.

 

[Crispy]

This is very entertaining

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birthmoviesdeath.com

when the first cat appeared on the screen, I let out an audible shriek and started laughing. It was the most ridiculous thing I'd ever seen, I couldn't even process that it was really happening. There were maybe ten other people in the theater by the time the movie started (thankfully I got a seat on the very edge), and I tried to look around to see if they were losing their minds, and they weren't. They were just watching it like it was a normal film, and that made me paranoid, like I was an outsider, they were against me, or I was somehow seeing something different than what they were seeing. I thought anyone seeing the movie at this point would be doing so ironically, but they WEREN'T. They weren't laughing at all. After the first song, some of them CLAPPED! I was in a room full of CATS FANS, and I feared they would find out that I was an undercover agent in their bizarre cult.

 

[Mrs Miggins]

Has anyone here seen it yet?

 

[killer b]

I was planning on seeing it this week, but the only cinema I would consider seeing it in has stopped showing it. I'm not overly bothered.

 

[skyscraper101]

It's the opposite of anything I'd ever want to watch.

 

[Mrs Miggins]

I am intrigued but doubt I will go out of my way for it.

 

[cupid_stunt]

This is very entertaining

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birthmoviesdeath.com

That's a brilliant read!

I guess now would be a good time to mention that, because I thought the mushrooms were weak and wasn't sure at all of the dosage I took, I brought the rest of them with me and took a couple more right before the trailers started. I was not thinking straight, and it seemed like it would be entertaining if they kicked in even stronger about an hour into the film. HUGE MISTAKE.

 

[8ball]

That's a brilliant read!

Absolutely wonderful stuff.

Also:

... and that's when I tweeted that everyone involved in the movie should be in jail

 

[Reno]

(((((Shirl’s son)))))))

 

[Voley]

This is very entertaining

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birthmoviesdeath.com

'I felt like everyone in the theater was in a Cats cult and they were going to sacrifice me and skin me alive. I whispered to Steph, "This is fucking evil, they're evil, we're not supposed to be here, they all know."

 

[spanglechick]

I saw it yesterday. It made me cross because many of the problems are just down to a lack of consistency... in cinematography, set and art design, character rendering...

Film is a visual medium and yet Hooper spent $90million without having a unified visual concept.

As weird as the hybrid feliosapiens are, I think you’d get past that fairly quickly if there was a predictability about whether cat feet were supposed to be furry / not furry but cat-coloured / plain human feet.
(See also cat noses, cat chins, cat hands, cat cheeks...)

Why do the sets look exquisite in the derelict theatre but like a 1980s panto around the bins?

Why do some oversized props look beautiful, and others like they were made for a school play?

Why do the cats keep changing size relative to their environment?

Why is Idris Elba wearing 90s rave contact lenses the colour of green glow sticks??

Why is Taylor Swift only in one scene??? I know - busy celeb - but you’re making a single unit of cinematic art, not filling in the slot during the viewer vote on X Factor.


All that stuff is just poor filmmaking. I can forgive the final result being too uncanny valley. Forgive too the choice to make Elba’s macavity a short haired cat with very obvious human muscles... it made me sick in my mouth when he took his coat off (even though I fancy him), but I can forgive the bad artistry.

It’s the incompetence, the laziness, the lack of artistry that I don’t get.

 

[Celyn]

I am reminded, very irrelevantly, of another message board, in which a member, possibly in Manchester or Leeds, I don't recall, remarked on the occasion of a theatre performance of "Cats", not so much about the thing itself, but about when some cast members took a chance to get outdoors, both to get fresh air and to have a smoke, and an old drunk guy wandered along, stopped for a moment, took a bit from his vodka, saw people playing at being cats, thought about things, then he said "WOOF!"

 

[Reno]

 

[Reno]

...and apparently that isn't even much of an exaggeration. Some of the FX artists have been spilling the beans on what a nightmare this was to work on:

Cats VFX Editor Confirms the “Butthole Cut” Was Very Real, Very Terrible

“We went to call our supervisor, and we’re like, ‘There’s a f--king a--hole in there! There’s buttholes!’”

www.vanityfair.com