Brixton chitter-chatter & news Apr 2012

[Minnie_the_Minx]

It's mostly on my front gate I'm thinking of fixing up an electric fence tbh. Am fucking sick of having to go up to some bloke pissing and saying "Excuse me mate, but that's my front gate you're pissing on and I'd quite like to get in it" Although it is quite amusing seeing them embarassedly waddling down the street with their cock out afterwards

It's people like London Calling doing it who don't even think it smells. That's because they're men and used to pissy smelling pub loos

You need to electrify the whole lane. The name of the lane will be even more fitting

 

[Mrs Magpie]

The downside of the hot sunny days is the wafting smell of shit around the tube station crossing? Where does it come from? Does someone take a dump in the bins or something?

It comes from the station. There's a vent by the lifts and despite protestations from staff that it's damp, not sewage, I know the smell of shit when I smell it.

 

[Minnie_the_Minx]

The downside of the hot sunny days is the wafting smell of shit around the tube station crossing? Where does it come from? Does someone take a dump in the bins or something?

ah now I could smell piss when I crossed over from M&S to the tube station. I was starting to get worried I'd pissed myself without knowing as the smell of piss seemed to be following me around Brixton

 

[Orang Utan]

I chucked pebbles at pissers a couple of times on Brighton Terrace. That got rid of them!

 

[quimcunx]

It comes from the station. There's a vent by the lifts and despite protestations from staff that it's damp, not sewage, I know the smell of shit when I smell it.

I could smell it outside the body shop.

 

[colacubes]

It's people like London Calling doing it who don't even think it smells. That's because they're men and used to pissy smelling pub loos

You need to electrify the whole lane. The name of the lane will be even more fitting

It's so annoying, especially during the day when there's perfectly good public boys a mere 1 minute away in Popes Road. And it does absolutely stink between men who are old enough to know better, people who let their kids do it and the local tom cats.

Tip for any desperate men who aren't brave enough to use Popes Road - go and ask nicely in the Albert and they'll let you use the bogs. And then I won't have to get your piss all over my shoes when I'm on my way out

 

[colacubes]

I chucked pebbles at pissers a couple of times on Brighton Terrace. That got rid of them!

I got threatened with a slap by a drunk fella who then followed me up the stairs bellowing at me when I had a go at him for pissing on my gate once, so I tend to be a bit less confrontational now

 

[Minnie_the_Minx]

I saw a guy the other day having a piss in one of the doorways of the shops in Elm Park the other day. I gave him a look, but didn't say anything... which was lucky because he then came into the pub and furthermore, it didn't look like he'd just got in, as he already had a drink there

Mind you, the smell that comes out of their loo sometimes...

 

[Mrs Magpie]

I could smell it outside the body shop.

Something stinky under that bit of Brixton Road.....

 

[fortyplus]

It also stinks of shit on Atlantic Road but that's because there's a collapsed sewer the repairs to which are causing so much delivery aggravation.

 

[London_Calling]

Sorry about that. My contribution sailed down the Effra about 07.35.

I'll have a piss in Electic Lane a little later.

 

[colacubes]

Sorry about that. My contribution sailed down the Effra about 07.35.

I'll have a piss in Electic Lane a little later.

You'll get the hose on you if you do. I ain't afraid of the hosepipe ban

 

[Mrs Magpie]

You'll get the hose on you if you do. I ain't afraid of the hosepipe ban

Use of hoses are not banned for the purposes of cleaning stuff like that (this doesn't include cars). I know this because I asked during the last hosepipe ban because we hose down the pen that the guide dogs use for crapping/pissing and I was assured that was OK by Thames Water.

 

[Onket]

It makes things easier to find Onket, especially when the "search thread" function wasn't operating

Pah.

 

[Rushy]

Southwyck House is now a prime Clapham address.
http://www.eigroup.co.uk/auctioneer-templates/LotDetails.aspx?LotID=645748&a=5&c=brn

 

[editor]

Southwyck House is now a prime Clapham address.
http://www.eigroup.co.uk/auctioneer-templates/LotDetails.aspx?LotID=645748&a=5&c=brn

LOL!

 

[Onket]

Southwyck House is now a prime Clapham address.
http://www.eigroup.co.uk/auctioneer-templates/LotDetails.aspx?LotID=645748&a=5&c=brn

 

[stethoscope]

 

[Orang Utan]

You'll get the hose on you if you do. I ain't afraid of the hosepipe ban

It's not exactly enforceable is it? Who's gonna know if you use your hosepipe? Will there be inspectors patrolling people's gardens? We have a leaky pond to fill and a lawn in need of attention!

 

[editor]

Screengrabbed for posterity:

 

[Onket]

Those places are quite difficult to sell, I guess they'll try anything.

 

[Onket]

It's not exactly enforceable is it? Who's gonna know if you use your hosepipe? Will there be inspectors patrolling people's gardens? We have a leaky pond to fill and a lawn in need of attention!

I think they pretty much rely on people grassing folk up.

 

[Orang Utan]

And who would do that? They'd have to take pics. That would be epic busybodied curtain twitching!

 

[Minnie_the_Minx]

And who would do that?

plenty of people

 

[editor]

I'd love it if they forced the car wash business in front of the Barrier Block to stop because I'm fucking fed up with hearing the racket of those high pressure hoses all day long.

 

[Onket]

plenty of people

This^

 

[Minnie_the_Minx]

Households receive a letter and a formal warning or a “yellow card” before the £1,000 fine is imposed in a "three strikes and you are out" system.

In previous years the hosepipe ban was based on vague rules written up before the last war that only prevented the use of a hosepipe to water a private garden or wash a private car.

What you can’t do
Hose down children in the garden on a hot day.
Spray wash the patio before a barbecue.
Water the lawn.
Clean the car or wash the windows with a hosepipe.
Fill a paddling pool, swimming pool or ornamental fountain.

What you can do
Hose down a path or patio for health and safety reasons. For example people who keep chickens can use a power washer to remove manure.
Wash a pet or clean the living quarters of livestock.
Use drip or ‘trickle’ irrigation systems to keep plants alive or water the garden with a watering can.
Wash the car, windows or patio with bucket and mop.
Fill a pond with fish in it or maintain a swimming pool with a water conservation recycling system.

 

[Orang Utan]

So I can accidentally spray the lawn with an out-of-control hose laurel-and-hardy style, whilst filling the pond. Good to know.

 

[Mrs Magpie]

......
In previous years the hosepipe ban was based on vague rules written up before the last war that only prevented the use of a hosepipe to water a private garden or wash a private car......

It's very important to remember it's the hosepipe that's being banned, so effectively using a hosepipe to siphon bathwater from your upstairs bathroom to water the plants is an offence too.

 

[Orang Utan]

Watering cans fine though. Aaah, that's ok then.