PM Boris Johnson - monster thread for a monster twat

[two sheds]

Shame he didn't do anything about it while he still could.

 

[BCBlues]

Shame he didn't do anything about it while he still could.

He would have but the fridge door wouldn't open

 

[andysays]

I see he co-wrote this piece for the Independent warning of the perils of deforestation. Anything for a few bob eh?

This could be the answer to the climate crisis | Boris Johnson and Iván Duque

In sawing down our ancient forests we are cutting our own throats. It is time to review our legislation so that these crimes face proper sanctions, write Boris Johnson and Iván Duque

www.independent.co.uk

the image of Johnson cutting his own throat has cheered me up a bit

 

[DotCommunist]

Shame he didn't do anything about it while he still could.

I remember a protracted little episode during his run for PM where the very concept of planting trees in any number was declared ludicrous and impossible by all the tv news heads- roundly mocked.

 

[stavros]

Why would Murdoch pay for Johnson to visit? What can he do for him?

 

[LeytonCatLady]

This is hilarious

Liz Truss ‘painted over’ Boris Johnson’s £840-a-roll No 10 gold wallpaper, says Jeremy Hunt

 

[two sheds]

and that it had started to peel off

 

[cupid_stunt]

"The massive disappointment was to discover that that wallpaper had started to peel off of its own accord and had actually been painted over by Liz Truss.

"So I will be saying to my children: scratch over there, there’s gold in them walls'."

 

[quiet guy]

She was only there 44 days and she found time to do a bit of decorating. Bet it's graffiti she left on her last day Sunak is a ....

 

[cupid_stunt]

She was only there 44 days and she found time to do a bit of decorating. Bet it's graffiti she left on her last day Sunak is a ....

And, in that time she buggered both the economy AND the wallpaper.

 

[two sheds]

sounds like an improvement for the wallpaper though

 

[hash tag]

Oh joy. Hopefully an election loser

Boris Johnson will stand again at next general election, source says

Former prime minister to seek re-election for Uxbridge and South Ruislip constituency

www.theguardian.com

 

[Ax^]

hmm when was the last time he was in Uxbridge btw

 

[Elpenor]

Must remember to book the day after a general election off so I can pull an all nighters

 

[Pickman's model]

Must remember to book the day after a general election off so I can pull an all nighters

I did a 24 hour shift for the 2005 election

 

[Dom Traynor]

Dont MPs get a bigger payout if they get voted out compared to if they resign?

 

[Cerv]

Dont MPs get a bigger payout if they get voted out compared to if they resign?

yes. a sitting MP who stands for re-election but loses gets a payout, called the Loss of Office payment.
need to have been an MP for a minimum of 2 years, and the amount varies with length of service, age, up to a cap.

but as it's more than the £5k deposit to stand, it does create a perverse incentive for e.g. the ChangeUK lot to make a token entry they've no intention of trying to win rather than just walk away. I don't think things are quite that bad for Johnson yet though.

there's also a separate Winding Up allowance they can claim expenses for shutting down their office & getting rid of staff. for the month after they're not MPs anymore so can't claim regular MPs expenses. which I only mention because so many MPs employ relatives as assistants, that money will end up the in same household.

 

[Pickman's model]

yes. a sitting MP who stands for re-election but loses gets a payout, called the Loss of Office payment.
need to have been an MP for a minimum of 2 years, and the amount varies with length of service, age, up to a cap.

but as it's more than the £5k deposit to stand, it does create a perverse incentive for e.g. the ChangeUK lot to make a token entry they've no intention of trying to win rather than just walk away. I don't think things are quite that bad for Johnson yet though.

there's also a separate Winding Up allowance they can claim expenses for shutting down their office & getting rid of staff. for the month after they're not MPs anymore so can't claim regular MPs expenses. which I only mention because so many MPs employ relatives as assistants, that money will end up the in same household.

Surely a wind up allowance, it's most provoking

 

[Dom Traynor]

yes. a sitting MP who stands for re-election but loses gets a payout, called the Loss of Office payment.
need to have been an MP for a minimum of 2 years, and the amount varies with length of service, age, up to a cap.

but as it's more than the £5k deposit to stand, it does create a perverse incentive for e.g. the ChangeUK lot to make a token entry they've no intention of trying to win rather than just walk away. I don't think things are quite that bad for Johnson yet though.

there's also a separate Winding Up allowance they can claim expenses for shutting down their office & getting rid of staff. for the month after they're not MPs anymore so can't claim regular MPs expenses. which I only mention because so many MPs employ relatives as assistants, that money will end up the in same household.

It's £500 to stand not £5000

 

[SpookyFrank]

It's £500 to stand not £5000

5,000 is for PCC elections, to discourage anyone but party lickspittles from entering the contest and talking about stuff like making cops solve crimes instead of doing them, actually firing the racist ones etc.

 

[Elpenor]

Latest song by the Kunts - Fuck the Tories



I’ll be seeing them in two weeks time in New Cross

 

[cupid_stunt]

According to Sky News, Johnson has declared £1m in earnings since being removed as PM for just four speeches!

That's complete madness, how is this even possible?

 

[quiet guy]

Does anyone remember anything that was said in any of these speeches? If idiots want to throw their money away...

 

[Pickman's model]

Latest song by the Kunts - Fuck the Tories



I’ll be seeing them in two weeks time in New Cross

Hope they cover the living legends' 'tory funerals'

 

[hash tag]

According to Sky News, Johnson has declared £1m in earnings since being removed as PM for just four speeches!

That's complete madness, how is this even possible?

It's possible because people are prepared to pay what he asks!

 

[Serge Forward]

He should do some NFT trading cards.

 

[Pickman's model]

He should do some NFT trading cards.

he'd only do that if he could snort them

 

[teqniq]

So we continue to pick up the tab:

Partygate: ministers accused of writing ‘blank cheque’ for Boris Johnson legal bills

 

[stavros]

Any further sight on the Parliamentary investigation as to whether he was a lying cunt in the Commons?

 

[hash tag]

So we continue to pick up the tab:

Partygate: ministers accused of writing ‘blank cheque’ for Boris Johnson legal bills

I am sure we will be doing so in years to come in one way or another.